While I'm no expert in football statistics, these are my thoughts on what I think is working for City (as an example) when I looked at their individual player stats:
Ederson - In the bottom 2% of goal kicks taken across top 5 leagues in Europe. He's also in the bottom 10% for passes over 40 yards.
Ake, Dias, Stones, Akanji, Walker, Gvardiol - Every single one of those 6 players are at 90+ percentile for passing. If you look at our players, only Martinez is up there with that group, so a good place to start would be those ball playing CBs and FBs. 1 or 2 of these City players are also excellent at progressive carries.
Rodri - leads every stat when it comes to passing, and is also 99th percentile for progressive passes and carries. Case while he's great with the defensive side of things (top percentiles across Europe for tackles, blocks, clearances and aerial duals), is well behind in progressive passing and ball carrying.
Bernardo - Also great with his progressive passes and carries, while being in the 98th percentile both for passes attempted and passes completed. Mainoo might still get there but he doesn't impose himself in a game in that same way yet.
De Bruyne (Small sample size with him this season admittedly) - Also in the top of Europe in his passing stats (passes attempted, progressive passes, progressive carries, take ons and touches in the attacking penalty area). He is 99th percentile for progressive passes received, which shows how well everyone behind him works to get the ball safely to him while being higher up the pitch (And how good he is at receiving). Bruno on the other hand is the only midfielder in our team that is in the 99th percentile for progressive passes but is only in the 25th percentile for progressive passes received and is well behind KdB in those other areas I mentioned earlier, while being ahead in the defensive actions - Which means, he's not able to play a proper No 10 role with this team as he doesn't have the right profile of midfielders/defenders behind him that are ball carriers and most of the time, he's got to do his progressive passing from behind the half way line.
From their usual wide attackers -
Doku, Grealish, Alvarez and Foden are high up in those passing/carrying stats. Rashford is well below par in these stats, and Garnacho only excels in progressive carries plus touches in attacking pen. area. Alvarez and Doku are high up in the tackles stat (Above 80th percentile), while Rashy for example in the 4th and 5th percentile respectively for tackles and interceptions (None of the City wide players this season are below the 40th percentile in at least one of these stats)
Garna at least is doing well with interceptions and Antony for all his faults is high up with his defensive contributions. It's painfully obvious we need wide attackers who can carry the ball, make progressive passes and can put those tackles/interceptions in.
Haaland - Decent pass accuracy for a CF, and takes a lot of touches in the box (90th percentile). Hojlund on the other hand takes far less touches in the box (50th percentile), but is well ahead of Haaland in terms of ball carries and take ons. He is also quite high for progressive passes received (78th percentile, whereas Haaland is in the 12th percentile). I think what this shows is that Hojlund is not able to be a fully functioning centre forward in this team, he has to do a lot of the ball carrying in the final third - Whereas he should just be the final piece of the puzzle, that is able to do some passing, but is there solely to score goals.
Putting all this together, if we want to play with more control, I think we need CBs/FBs who are able to pass progressively, while also carrying the ball well. The midfield 3 themselves need to be passing and carrying the ball to a high standard. This composed spine of the team allows our GK to play short/flat passes to distribute the ball. The ability to pass well with composure then leads to more possession, and less defensive actions required from the midfield and defence. The wide attackers also need to pass more often, pass more accurately, pass progressively, carry the ball forwards more often, and contribute defensively at a high level (Either via tackles or interceptions). Our CF then just needs to make more runs into the box, and utilise the passing abilities of the wide players / FBs / midfielders to have more effective touches inside the box. I think Rasmus, Garna, Kobbie, Bruno, Shaw, Licha, Dalot, Onana, Mount are all capable of playing this way. I'm just not convinced with the rest of our squad - Case, Varane, and Rashford just needs to get replaced for cheaper/younger options that suit this kind of football more. Perhaps Bruno needs to go as well, but I think he will improve with better players around him - I don't see him necessarily as the biggest problem, but if he is, he will get found out next to those better players quite quickly. Then we need better squad options who are also good at passing and ball carrying - This means Maguire, Lindelof, AWB, McTominay, Antony, Sancho, Greenwood all need selling. That's 10 players to sell and then 4 defenders, 3 midfielders, and around 3 wide players to add.
10 years of mismanagement + two bad decisions by ETH/Murtogh on Antony and Case (Good player but not for us imo) results in this mess, hope that INEOS themselves see that the squad still needs a lot of work. Oldest player we signed during the Gill/Fergie era was RVP so I hope we return to that policy when we buy from outside, and I hope some more of our youth players will also help us bridge this gap.