Film The Redcafe Movie review thread

And also Violent Shit 4: That's The Last Time I Have Curry Pot Noodle.
 
Wait, Pauldy has misled us. The Violent Shit he watched is a 2015 remake set in Rome; the sequels are actually sequels to the original 1989 Violent Shit, they were respectively released in 1992 and 1999.

Pauldy please watch all originals for us please. They are in German so they should be enjoyable to watch.
 
Oh come on, this must be an elaborated spoof by Pauldy, it's not possible. First phrase of the IMDB synopsis of the 1992 sequel:
Drilled by his deranged mother
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Is Mr. Violent Shit, a.k.a. Karl the Butcher, actually Cina?
 
Those prequels will never match the original Bourne Identity for violent shit; just look at OAP Richard Chamberlain in a wig and former Charlie's Farleys bimbo Jaclyn Smith: they're like caged tigers...

bourneidentity88.jpg
 
Rooney in Paris said:
Wait, Pauldy has misled us. The Violent Shit he watched is a 2015 remake set in Rome; the sequels are actually sequels to the original 1989 Violent Shit, they were respectively released in 1992 and 1999.

Pauldy please watch all originals for us please. They are in German so they should be enjoyable to watch.
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The world needs a Pauldyson/ Violent Shit version of Gogglebox.
 
Rooney in Paris said:
Wait, Pauldy has misled us. The Violent Shit he watched is a 2015 remake set in Rome; the sequels are actually sequels to the original 1989 Violent Shit, they were respectively released in 1992 and 1999.

Pauldy please watch all originals for us please. They are in German so they should be enjoyable to watch.
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I had no idea it was a remake. It was one of those really bad films U just have to watch till the end.
The last 20 mins is sick, one point you see a guys balls cut off and that is one of the tame bits.
 
Batman vs Superman

It had moments of fun and parts that I enjoyed, but it was boring for long stretches and there were a lot of things not explained very well or that did not make sense (or at least to me they didn't). Some characters motivations and the reasons that certain things happened were pretty bad and silly IMO. Like I said, I had fun watching this at times, but it is nowhere near as good as some of the very good-great superhero movies and shows that have come out in recent years. Affleck was good though, and I am happy for him. I remember there was a silly, dramatic meltdown on the internet when he was announced as Batman a few years ago. I am glad that he proved those guys wrong. I would give it a 5/10.
 
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Watching Pretty Woman.... What has my life come to?
 
Sigma said:
:lol: I love that film, watching it too now.
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Its awful. The piano sex scene was awkward as shit. Richard Gere's character is too cliche and perfect and Julia Roberts character is annoyingly bubbly, again another cliche. Also, the random musical upbeat montages just annoy me.

Its the biggest general rom com cliche and I hate them. The only redeeming quality it has is knowing she likely has an STD and has passed her AIDs/Herpes infested loins on to the billionaire business man.
 
Just watched Youth . Thought it was superb - very understated at times but quality scenes. Loved the Maradona character :lol:
 
The Secret in Their Eyes (2015)

Yet another Hollywood remake that destroyed most of what was good about the original and assumed the twist at the end would work just as well in an entirely different context. The central story is still the same but it handles the jumps between past and present so incoherently that most of the key scenes lose their impact, the initial introduction to the story is so much more implausible for no apparent reason, and the key relationship to the person murdered is changed so dramatically that the twist loses all its impact and credibility. Really strange.

I do think there's a replace for Hollywood remakes because there is a sizeable audience who just don't enjoy subtitled films. I watched it this evening because some people in my family are like that. I wasn't expecting it to be as good as the original either, and I think it's a passable film that served its purpose. I just don't quite understand why they're so poorly translated into American films.
 
Raul Madrid said:
Batman vs Superman

It had moments of fun and parts that I enjoyed, but it was boring for long stretches and there were a lot of things not explained very well or that did not make sense (or at least to me they didn't). Some characters motivations and the reasons that certain things happened were pretty bad and silly IMO. Like I said, I had fun watching this at times, but it is nowhere near as good as some of the very good-great superhero movies and shows that have come out in recent years. Affleck was good though, and I am happy for him. I remember there was a silly, dramatic meltdown on the internet when he was announced as Batman a few years ago. I am glad that he proved those guys wrong. I would give it a 5/10.
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I will give it a 5/10 as well, batman was always a genius but was played by Lex, superman almost destroyed a city fighting the general and 18 months latter they had a statue of him. Superman was better here than the man of steel when even hulk was stronger than him. Why accusing superman of killing some terrorists in Africa when they were shot to dead? And really after half of a city was demolished with thousand of people dead they would care about a few terrorists?
 
Brwned said:
The Secret in Their Eyes (2015)

Yet another Hollywood remake that destroyed most of what was good about the original and assumed the twist at the end would work just as well in an entirely different context. The central story is still the same but it handles the jumps between past and present so incoherently that most of the key scenes lose their impact, the initial introduction to the story is so much more implausible for no apparent reason, and the key relationship to the person murdered is changed so dramatically that the twist loses all its impact and credibility. Really strange.

I do think there's a replace for Hollywood remakes because there is a sizeable audience who just don't enjoy subtitled films. I watched it this evening because some people in my family are like that. I wasn't expecting it to be as good as the original either, and I think it's a passable film that served its purpose. I just don't quite understand why they're so poorly translated into American films.
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I've not heard of this one, i'll def check out the original!
 
Had no idea they remade it. Original was fantastic but I'll give the new one a swerve after reading that.
 
Remakes always just seem lazy to me. I get that some people hate subtitles, but if you're going to remake good films, at least make them decent.
 
August Underground
Two bellends go on a murder spree with one of them filming the whole thing. To start, I have to say that I only watched about 35 minutes of this so my review might be a little inaccurate. Now, I have seen some really violent and horrific movies, from Serbian Film to Martyrs to Cannibal Holocaust but nothing compares to this. Filmed like found footage, this ultra violent, ultra pointless film depicts the murders so realistically, that it almost feels like snuff. I was watching this afraid that the cops would come in and arrest me faster than an Albuquerque cop arresting Jon Jones. I actually felt sick watching it and had to have a shower to cleanse myself. fecking awful motherfecker of a film. The director needs to be bitch slapped for making this 0/10
 
barros said:
I will give it a 5/10 as well, batman was always a genius but was played by Lex, superman almost destroyed a city fighting the general and 18 months latter they had a statue of him. Superman was better here than the man of steel when even hulk was stronger than him. Why accusing superman of killing some terrorists in Africa when they were shot to dead? And really after half of a city was demolished with thousand of people dead they would care about a few terrorists?
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I don't get your point about Superman and The Hulk?
 
Caught Midnight Special at a preview screening and really enjoyed it. Some definite ET influence and excellent performances all round. Unfortunately doesn't seem to be getting a major release in the cinemas.
 
Dirty Schwein said:
August Underground
Two bellends go on a murder spree with one of them filming the whole thing. To start, I have to say that I only watched about 35 minutes of this so my review might be a little inaccurate. Now, I have seen some really violent and horrific movies, from Serbian Film to Martyrs to Cannibal Holocaust but nothing compares to this. Filmed like found footage, this ultra violent, ultra pointless film depicts the murders so realistically, that it almost feels like snuff. I was watching this afraid that the cops would come in and arrest me faster than an Albuquerque cop arresting Jon Jones. I actually felt sick watching it and had to have a shower to cleanse myself. fecking awful motherfecker of a film. The director needs to be bitch slapped for making this 0/10
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Worse than Serbian Film? That was awful on so many levels.
 
Dirty Schwein said:
This was worse. Serbian film was horrible but it had a "storyline" and the violence and stuff didn't feel real. This was much more like snuff
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Know what you mean about Serbian- the twist the end was beyond ridiculous.
I doubt I'll watch this August. Can't see it being on TV and I'm not a big downloader. Not entirely sure I want to see it, but you know what's like, you hear something's bad and you become curious as to how bad it is...
 
Mad Dog and Glory - Decent crime film, Uma Thurman >>> ... 5/10

Jennifer's Body - Pretty terrible film but Megan Fox is in her prime here. 3/10
 
Jippy said:
Know what you mean about Serbian- the twist the end was beyond ridiculous.
I doubt I'll watch this August. Can't see it being on TV and I'm not a big downloader. Not entirely sure I want to see it, but you know what's like, you hear something's bad and you become curious as to how bad it is...
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Trust me don't watch it. I wish I hadn't.
 
Watched Taxi Driver. Didn't know what to make of it and was feeling a bit weirded out until the last couple of scenes. Made everything click in my head and really tied the film together well. 8/10
 
Sounds ominous, given how much horror you've watched. Thought I'd seen more than my fair share 'til I started reading this thread.
 
Gol123 said:
Watched Taxi Driver. Didn't know what to make of it and was feeling a bit weirded out until the last couple of scenes. Made everything click in my head and really tied the film together well. 8/10
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Skunk pussy!
 
Hello my name is Doris
Weak plot that quickly runs out of ideas. If Sally Field has made a worse film I have yet to see it. 1/10
 
The more I think on it, the more Taxi Driver goes up in my rating.
 
Jippy said:
Sounds ominous, given how much horror you've watched. Thought I'd seen more than my fair share 'til I started reading this thread.
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See I really like supernatural films and don't mind the occasional Gore fest if there's justification for said gore. August Underground had no story and was very realistic, making me wonder why I was even watching it... I felt like a dirty schwein :lol:
 
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