Haven't played a CM/FM game properly in years but treated myself to this over Christmas and got into it. Just finished my first season with United, which went OK. Blew most of my transfer budget on Stones before the season kicked off but did manage to flog Fellaini to PSG for 17 million so that worked out well. Last I heard Ligue 1 wasn't exactly shaking beneath the shadow of his 'fro. Aside from that I pretty much went with the team I had.
First half of the season went well - Martial was raw but scoring at a rate of just worse than one in two and Memphis was destroying teams from an inside forward position on the left. Those two were really powering my good form and aside from a couple of silly losses to shit teams we looked good. Rooney picked up a three month injury at one point so, in a stroke of genius, I went out and picked up Michu on a free. In he came, the wee little Spanish magician, to serve as backup and although stats of 1 goal and 1 assist in 10 games don't look great he goes down as a fans favourite, in a Henrik Larsson style, for the short time he spent at the club. What the stats don't tell you is that most of his games were off the bench. Or that his one goal was a 35 yard lob at Anfield to win the game. Legend.
3 months before the end of the season, though, disaster strikes and Martial and Memphis decide to have a leg kicking contest or something and both end up breaking legs within a week of each other. After that we're slow, sluggish, and limp to 4th place. Chelsea ran away with it. It wasn't all shit though, we made the CL semis due, I can only assume, to Woody bunging the knockout stage draw officials (Olympiakos in the round of 16, Porto in the QF - cheers UEFA). We had to play a proper team in the semis because there were only proper teams left. Juve smashed us 2-0 in Turin and then played the most quintessentially Italian game of "feck you" to get a 0-0 at Old Trafford (I shit you not. How else do you explain "extended highlights" meaning I got to see one shot from Herrera sail over the crossbar in 90 minutes). Story of the season, though, was the FA cup win. 3-1 over Chelsea in the final with two goals for Antonio Valencia. You could see the little 3-D rendition of him running over to the home fans with his arms aloft and, I swear, a facial expression that said "Nah, I can't believe it either, I'm rubbish"
The board basically ejaculated £140m at me at that point and excitedly demanded that I spend it. I bid for Embolo, he fecked off to Spurs. I bid for Berardi, he fecked off to Spurs. I bid for Icardi on the basis that if Spurs made an offer I was marching down to White Hart Lane with a ski mask and a molotov. Levy took the hint and kept his distance. Tielemans and Bazoer cam too, for £26m combined. That's my "BFS and Carrick ain't getting any younger" business. I blew £27m on Alex Texeira, after receiving a scout report that basically said "If someone served you a meal of broken glass and liquid faeces and promised to sell you this lad after dinner you'd have to eat it. He's that good."
Now my squad is huge, though. Januzaj's come back from loan. Gribbin will be expecting something, too. I gave him a few minutes at the end of last season and he scored two goals in three games. I tried to flog Rojo and Young but no bastard wants them and Juan Mata's thrown a hissy fit because I rejected £55m from Barca for him. I'm almost hoping for an injury crisis just so everyone will get a chance to play.
I remember when I was 16 I stayed up all night the night before a GCSE mock exam due to an exhilarating Champions League run. We lost in the final, Philip Mexes got sent off in the 2nd minute and I foolhardily decided to be gung-ho and play for 88 with 3 at the back until we were 4-1 down and I finally accepted my mistake and sent Wes Brown on to make it 4 again. Could barely keep my eyes open in the exam the next morning. I'd always thought that "ChampMan addiction" stuff was a bit juvenile and behind me but as I sit at work today and tinker with a report that's due this week it's probably not a good sign that the thing at the front of my mind is how I'm going to find room for Rooney in my team this year and whether playing without a dedicated holding midfielder is going to leave me vulnerable against the big teams.
