Alexis Sanchez | Done deal

Status
Not open for further replies.
SalfordRed18 said:
I don't get it personally. Pep spends 130mil on 3 fullbacks and he's called a perfectionist. We spend £30mil on Sanchez, a genuine world class talent, and the games dead.

Solid fecking logic there.
Click to expand...
And on the same fecking player, city we're ready to spend £60m, less than 6 months ago:rolleyes:
 
Latest from Howard Nurse (genuinely) was this!



"Soon" as of 16 hours ago.
 
Howard Nurse: "Mr Sanchez and Mrs Sanchez are about conceive Alexis Sanchez, I'm hearing. No, nope, Sorry! It's his sister."
 
Just a reminder lads and lasses - wumming isn't allowed, even on a speculative thread like this one. Don't wind people up more than they already are!
 
buchansleftleg said:
The Ballade of Pep Guardiola

Whilst his Merrye Man City club have been heaped with praise, few have been given access to the inner man, the quiet genius that is Pep Guardiola. So it was with a hushed reverence and supplicant bowing that I was finally allowed behind the scenes to meet the great man himself.

Others might have picked their office, or the gym, or the heaving trophy cabinet for such an interview, but not the one some have called the hooded Catalan!

To the gentle strains of a mediaeval madrigal we met in a secluded wood near Manchester and through the misty haze of smoke that seemed to make his features even more chiselled, I listened to the great man speaketh….

“you know it’s not about money or glory or trophies….I’m here to educate and help people be better people” said the shiny headed prophet. “Do you know when Kyle Walker arrived, he knew nothing of the songs of Merry Englande, and had to be taught the difference between a Lute and a Lyre – shocking!”

As the great man speaks he absent-mindedly binds two vines together to create a rudimentary rope which he effortlessly then forms into the shape of 2 swans passing a ball back and forth.

He speaks eloquently for some 10 minutes, putting right the wrongs of Football in England, suggesting a cheap and simple reform of the distribution of wealth and land rights, as well as offering a home to the oft forgotten King Richard, for so long, lost to foreign lands.

His Merrye band gradually join us, hanging off his every word….”look at this man there…my “little John” Stones – we have worked together to make him a better player, not just bought him a bigger staff or surrounded him with lots of others to defend the wood from the evil Sheriiff!”

His team grew tense at the mention of the Sheriff Mourinho and the conversation soon moves onto a different subject. “Here we nurture the group, we offer fresh air, good food, a fruit based vitamin drink that is totally above board and I’ll take you to the Court of Arbitration for Sport if you disagree and the chance to truly express yourself as a merrye man!”

But what of those that say the backing of club by Moorish forces beyond these shores represents a threat to the nation and that they have suspect practices in the building of their castles, halls and football stadia?

A strange calm comes over him, like a monk in prayer and he responds “This criticism of the owners of the Merrye Men is unjust and racist. These simple farmers of the land have placed their faith and oil in me to bring glory to the band. We will ensure they never hear the word No or are not able to buy the swiftest horse in the land or another left back.”

“What about those that have left the merry band such as Will Scar-Hart – were they not merry?”

Again, bathed in serenity and showing no anger the great leader responds…”I consider that a goalkeeper should be a wandering minstrel…touring the land to bring music, laughter and clearing out the last third of the pitch as a sweeper, not just staying in the woods stopping arrow shots!”

I hesitate before asking my final question as I want to spend more time in this beautiful man’s presence….”So what do you say to those who say you are a lucky outlaw; who inherited a great team in the land of Aragon, then again in the Germanic lands of the holy roman empire and have spent legion of silver ducket and gold doubloon to assemble a merrye band of mercenaries here in olde Englande!”

A single tear traces down his manly stubble and he shakes his head….”No…No….it’s not about the money…..it’s all about the glory….the majesty…..the echoing sound of a half full wood of people cheering the band on...in memory of this great man!” and at that point he reaches down and from his hairy but well-groomed chest he produces a heart shaped locket that he carefully places on a simple wooden stool with gold plated handles…”this man knew what it was all about….he is our inspiration!”

He leaves the clearing, clearly emotionally moved. With a shaking hand I reach out and pick it up, noting the inscription on the front. ”Our #10” I open it to reveal… a faded picture of Shaun Goater and cry bitter tears of regret for having ever questioned the great man’s genius!
Click to expand...

Haha
 
The press are in large going down the route of him going to United because it’s a bigger story and him going to City. If he turns around and does go to City, they get to use the u-turn/powershift narrative as an even bigger story. They’re unsurprisingly putting them self in a position where they can’t lose really.

This isn’t done. How long does Sánchez wait for City to put the money up? United aren’t in a position of power either so can’t issue a deadline or ultimatum.
 
Ubik said:
Latest from Howard Nurse (genuinely) was this!



"Soon" as of 16 hours ago.
Click to expand...


Wow that's a miracle! he actually replied on something recent.

Or maybe not. The question was not specific. Maybe he means Sanchez moving to Barca from Udinese.
 
Hey guys, I wonder what Howard Nurse is saying about all of this. Maybe he’s found out that Barca are willing to sell hurr hurr *waves penis around*
 
Ubik said:
Latest from Howard Nurse (genuinely) was this!



"Soon" as of 16 hours ago.
Click to expand...


AH Howard Nurse, nice to see you again old friend.

Back in 2013 when United were trying to sign Sneijder, Howard Nurse would ring up the Old Trafford reception asking for updates
 
Getting alerts on my phone now that he’s going to City after all. This is the worst transfer saga ever.
 
Howard Nurse has probably only just realised he's a meme, he'll write about it next year.
 
Jazz said:
No Martial in that deal. Absolute madness. Just leave Sanchez and Ozil with ARsenal.
Arsenal taking the piss wanting Martial, and for nothing. Why can't the club just come out and say Martial is not for sale to anyone. Exchanging a talented young player for some petulant 30 year old. Absolute madness which better not be true.
Click to expand...

Jesus Christ calm down Martial wont be going anywhere.
 
el3mel said:
So Martial has been a consistent starter for 2 or more months now, scoring and assisting regularly and anyone is thinking he can actually leave mid-season ? Ok.
Click to expand...

Not anyone that has more than 2 brain cells. It's just lazy journalism because of the rumours of last summer (re: Inter) and because they both play in similar positions.

Martial on current form and value is going nowhere. Arse couldn't even afford him. If Coutinho and Dembele are worth £150m, Martial is not far off.
 
loop said:
I think a lot of people are forgetting that we are still in the champions league and we can add him to the squad. Yes it's not going to be "easy" as winning the Europa League, but we have more of a chance with Alexis.
Click to expand...
:lol: I like your optimism
 
Listen if Jose decided to sell Martial, really, people would have doubts but surely there would be a reason for it. It's not like he's some stupid feck that can't tell right from left.

And don't start about KdB - He wanted to leave Chelsea.
 
Obiorahking_ said:
Wouldn't you prefer we get older more expierenced players for our youngins to grow into instead of getting more young players that would crowd them out in the long term?
Click to expand...
Id prefer us to sign players just entering their prime who can play alongside our young players, not players at the end of their prime who play in the same position who it will be politically hard to drop considering the £350,000k a week reported wage.
 
Status
Not open for further replies.