Television We didn't all go to Gudger College

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Hello, my name is Mr. Burns, I believe you have a letter for me.
Ok, what's your first name Mr. Burns?
... I don't know.
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It's weird that I've seen every episode up to season 11, but beyond that have perhaps seen 10-20 episodes from season 12 onwards.

We need a list of the best episodes from season 12 onwards. Maybe in another thread?
 
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Hello Marge
Hi Homey!
Sign this please!
You're the boss!
Daddy! Ask the man for some candy!
No no, no candy for you!
Well at least get some candy for yourself!
Hehehe... kids.
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Montgomery Burns: Why is that man wearing pink? Smithers, who is that?
Waylon Smithers: Homer Simpson, one of your boobs from sector 7-G.
Montgomery Burns: Simpson, eh? Judging from his attire, he must be some kind of free-thinking anarchist.
Waylon Smithers: I'll alert security.
Montgomery Burns: Excellent! These color monitors are already paying for themselves.
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Kent Brockman: Good evening. Springfield is still grappling tonight with the departure of Reverend Timothy Lovejoy, local Bible nut. How is our community coping with this spiritual vaccuum? Let's ask Arnie Pie in the Sky!
Arnie Pie: You wanna know what I see, Kent? I see a slow news day with nothing to fill it!
Kent Brockman: Arnie, you're supposed to be filming people coping with the loss of their church!
Arnie Pie: And how am I supposed to do that? Do I have a magic lens that can see into peoples' SOULS? Well, yours would be BLACK, Kent! BLACK AS THE ACE OF SPADES!!!
 
Homer: He's got all the money in the world, but there's one thing he can't buy
Marge: What's that?
Homer: ......... A DINOSAUR.
 
OnlyTwoDaSilvas said:
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Principal Skinner: Superintendent, I hope you're ready for mouth-watering hamburgers.
Superintendant Chalmers: I thought we were having steamed clams.
Principal Skinner: Oh, no, I said, "steamed hams." That's what I call hamburgers.
Superintendant Chalmers: You call hamburgers steamed hams.
Principal Skinner: Yes, it's a regional dialect.
Superintendant Chalmers: Uh-huh. What region?
Principal Skinner: Uh, upstate New York.
Superintendant Chalmers: Really. Well, I'm from Utica and I never heard anyone the phrase, "steamed hams."
Principal Skinner: Oh, not in Utica, no; it's an Albany expression.
Superintendant Chalmers: I see.
[Chalmers takes a bite of the "steamed ham"]
Superintendant Chalmers: You know, these hamburgers are quite similar to the ones they have at Krusty Burger.
Principal Skinner: Oh, no, patented Skinner Burgers. Old family recipe.
Superintendant Chalmers: For steamed hams.
Principal Skinner: Yes
Superintendant Chalmers: Yes, and you call them steamed hams despite the fact that they are obviously grilled.
Principal Skinner: Uh... you know... one thing I sh -... 'scuse me for one second.

[Superintendant Chalmers sees Principal Skinner's kitchen on fire]

Superintendant Chalmers: Good Lord, what is happening in there?
Principal Skinner: The Aurora Borealis?
Superintendant Chalmers: The Aurora Borealis? At this time of year? At this time of day? In this part of the country? Localized entirely within your kitchen?
Principal Skinner: Yes.
Superintendant Chalmers: May I see it?
Principal Skinner: No.
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:lol:

The best scene!
 
The dialogue between Chalmers and Skinner is always incredible.

Ralph: What's a battle?
Skinner: Haha! Lets go.
Chalmers: Did that boy say what's a battle?
Skinner: No he said What's that rattle, it's about the heating duct.
Chalmers: Hmm, it sounded like battle.
Skinner: I've had a cold, so--
Chalmers: Oh so you hear r's as b's?
 
Just saw the Simon Cowell one again, when Moe is approached by an agent to appear on American Idol:

Producer: And not British
Moe: Good, I hate the British. People think I'm British but don't be fooled by my pasty face and bad teeth.

Haha, any chance of a dig at our teeth. :) They're not wrong. :(
 
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Homer: Lisa, you like homework. Would you fill out this form for me?
Lisa: Well, all right - if you listen to the poem I just wrote.
Homer: D'oh...! Uh, okay.
Lisa Simpson: "Meditations on Turning Eight," by Lisa Simpson.
"I had a cat named Snowball, she died, she died!
Mom said she was sleeping, she lied, she lied!
Why, oh why is my cat dead?
Couldn't that Chrysler hit me instead?
I had a hamster named Snuffy, he died!"
Homer: No deal.
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Whenever Burns asked who homer was he got a different description everytime :lol:
 
Zina said:
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Homer: You don't understand. My son just threw his red hat in with the white laundry!
Mr. Burns: Spare me the tiresome antics of the Simpson family! Take him away.
Smithers: You know, Mr Burns, his body cavity search revealed nothing, and we must have X-rayed him a hundred times. Maybe he's telling the truth.
Mr. Burns: Hmph...or perhaps you two are in cahoots! Smithers, I seem to recall you had a penchant for bell-bottom trousers back in '79.
Smithers: Sir, that was my costume from the plant prodution of H.M.S. Pinafore.
Mr. Burns: Oh, yes. Your spirited hornpipes stole the show, as I recall.
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Kodos: My friends and I come in peace to find your vulnerabilities...and cure them with more peace.
Bart: Is that a ray gun?
Kodos: No! It's a... er... deodorant applicator! Yes, I'll just...
[Shoots himself with ray gun and winces in pain]
Kodos: Ughhhh. Er... Smells like a summer breeze.
 
Dental plan!

Lisa needs braces....

Dental plan!

Lisa needs braces...

Dental plan!

Lisa needs braces...
 
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Homer: Question two. Who was your last employer?
Shary Bobbins: Lord and Lady Huffington of Sussex.
Homer: Marge, do we know them?
Marge: No.
Homer: Come on! Isn't he the guy I bowl with? The black guy.
Marge: That's Carl.
Homer: Oh yeah. So! You worked for Carl, eh?
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