I'm not wound up, just amused. In theory it's fairly simple and straightforward to find PL players that could/would be in Madrid's XI but you somehow managed to make it funny by mentioning players who were clearly inferior.
The non exhaustive answer is Courtois and De Gea for the goalkeepers not Lloris because of his kicking game and for the midfielders Kanté, Fernandinho, maybe Herrera because they are mobile and defensively good enough to compete with Casemiro.
The rest of the league have no chance because they would have to compete with arguably the best players in their positions Carvajal, Marcelo, Ronaldo, Bale, Benzema*, Ramos, Varane, Modric, Kroos.
* For example Benzema in CL scored 51 goals in 95 games, you are not going to take his spot easily.