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09/10 Season Preview Part 3
09/10 Season Preview Part 3
@Samid and @Stobzilla on the San Antonio Spurs (52-30, 2nd Round)
The Spurs actually did quite well last season. Their regular season record was very good, and they made it to the 2nd round of the playoffs. The summer has not been nice to them, though. Every single player in the starting 5 has declined, including the 21 year old Stobzilla II. I wouldn't be too worried if I were him, though, since 60 at 21 probably means he's going to be pushing 70 at least. Samid doesn't have that long, though. He's still only 28, mind, so there's no need to panic quite yet. He's also one of those players were his rating hides the fact that he's absolutely going to score a lot of points no matter what.
@The Cat on the Phoenix Suns (43-39, 1st Round)
The Cat is another Cafite who saw a decline over the summer. In his case it might actually be countered by several other Suns players getting better, but they're still not likely to be particularly good. Then again they weren't supposed to be laset season either, and they made the playoffs (as The Cat is wont to do). Who knows, maybe they could do it again?
@oneniltothearsenal and the Sacramento Kings (34-48)
oneniltothearsenal also saw quite the decline, after staying remarkably stable even as he got into his early 30s. Mind you, 69 makes him still a very good player, and he'll still probably be a Triple-Double machine. His biggest challenge is probably just the fact that his team is incredibly poorly balanced. It's not a fantastic sign when you've got 39-rated Delonte West starting.
@Dan is on the Denver Nuggets (37-45)
It's an epidemic. When not even solid, dependable Dan is immune from the march of time, who is safe? Most of the decline is purely physical, which makes sense for a 32-year old. It remains to be seen what effect that will have, but what seems certain is that his Nuggets aren't going to be very good this season.
@P-Nut and the Memphis Grizzlies (2nd Round)
Finally! After all those declining oldeads, we get a young(ish) lad just approaching his prime. P-Nut had a fine run in the playoffs last season, and he's got every reason to hope for a repeat of that this year. His improvements were matched by several of his Grizzlies teammates. Despite that, however, he's not at all happy in Memphis. It's mainly got to do with the small market and mean spending, so they'd have to have a really good season to convince him to re-sign after his contract expires at the end of the season.
@altodevil and the Los Angeles Lakers (67-15, NBA Champions)
altodevil keeps declining physically, marginally, but he also keeps making up for it by getting technically better. It doesn't mean much at this point, but if he starts seeing the 20s in some of those technical skills he might actually start taking more than two shots per game. Still, his dominance is very much reliant on his physique, so it will be interesting to see how this affects the Lakers. They did get marginally worse overall, but it's still a very, very deep team.
@Dr. Dwayne and the Utah Jazz (36-46)
I'm not sure Dr. Dwayne is going to be happy to see his chance at re-signing with the Utah Jazz as high as 7%. The Jazz are in the same spot as a few other teams at this point: not very bad, but probably not good either. A starting 5 all between 58 and 65 rating probably isn't going to cut it. Luckily for Dr. Dwayne he's only got another couple of seasons on his contract, so his championship dreams aren't over quite yet. If he stays in the 60s as he gets older he's still got every chance of ending up on a cheap contract on a very good team.
@Samid and @Stobzilla on the San Antonio Spurs (52-30, 2nd Round)
The Spurs actually did quite well last season. Their regular season record was very good, and they made it to the 2nd round of the playoffs. The summer has not been nice to them, though. Every single player in the starting 5 has declined, including the 21 year old Stobzilla II. I wouldn't be too worried if I were him, though, since 60 at 21 probably means he's going to be pushing 70 at least. Samid doesn't have that long, though. He's still only 28, mind, so there's no need to panic quite yet. He's also one of those players were his rating hides the fact that he's absolutely going to score a lot of points no matter what.
@The Cat on the Phoenix Suns (43-39, 1st Round)
The Cat is another Cafite who saw a decline over the summer. In his case it might actually be countered by several other Suns players getting better, but they're still not likely to be particularly good. Then again they weren't supposed to be laset season either, and they made the playoffs (as The Cat is wont to do). Who knows, maybe they could do it again?
@oneniltothearsenal and the Sacramento Kings (34-48)
oneniltothearsenal also saw quite the decline, after staying remarkably stable even as he got into his early 30s. Mind you, 69 makes him still a very good player, and he'll still probably be a Triple-Double machine. His biggest challenge is probably just the fact that his team is incredibly poorly balanced. It's not a fantastic sign when you've got 39-rated Delonte West starting.
@Dan is on the Denver Nuggets (37-45)
It's an epidemic. When not even solid, dependable Dan is immune from the march of time, who is safe? Most of the decline is purely physical, which makes sense for a 32-year old. It remains to be seen what effect that will have, but what seems certain is that his Nuggets aren't going to be very good this season.
@P-Nut and the Memphis Grizzlies (2nd Round)
Finally! After all those declining oldeads, we get a young(ish) lad just approaching his prime. P-Nut had a fine run in the playoffs last season, and he's got every reason to hope for a repeat of that this year. His improvements were matched by several of his Grizzlies teammates. Despite that, however, he's not at all happy in Memphis. It's mainly got to do with the small market and mean spending, so they'd have to have a really good season to convince him to re-sign after his contract expires at the end of the season.
@altodevil and the Los Angeles Lakers (67-15, NBA Champions)
altodevil keeps declining physically, marginally, but he also keeps making up for it by getting technically better. It doesn't mean much at this point, but if he starts seeing the 20s in some of those technical skills he might actually start taking more than two shots per game. Still, his dominance is very much reliant on his physique, so it will be interesting to see how this affects the Lakers. They did get marginally worse overall, but it's still a very, very deep team.
@Dr. Dwayne and the Utah Jazz (36-46)
I'm not sure Dr. Dwayne is going to be happy to see his chance at re-signing with the Utah Jazz as high as 7%. The Jazz are in the same spot as a few other teams at this point: not very bad, but probably not good either. A starting 5 all between 58 and 65 rating probably isn't going to cut it. Luckily for Dr. Dwayne he's only got another couple of seasons on his contract, so his championship dreams aren't over quite yet. If he stays in the 60s as he gets older he's still got every chance of ending up on a cheap contract on a very good team.
Think i’ve had the worst career out of everyone.
Lakers looking weaker. Not a fan of the JR Smith trade. I'm also getting old. All that being said, we still have a chance at a threepeat. But I'm not betting on it. Grizz look scary.
What are the rules again to retire gracefully after this season and get a new replacement in?
Don't want to end up in some slumhole like LA.
Great writeups again!
Don't want to end up in some slumhole like LA.
Great writeups again!
Thanks!
If you're under 60 rating (and over 25 years) you can take early retirement and your brother/son in the next draft.
My species reproduce by binary fission so how is that going to work when it comes to retirement?
Career ending?
You'll miss 90-95 games, tops.
Elon is going to attempt to mate with you, but in the end you are going to self-annihilate and spawn a... well, spawn.
Those of us stuck on losing teams our careers should get to band together for one final playoff run before we all retire
09/10 25-Game Update
09/10 25-Game Update
Standings:
Trades:
@Skizzo (IND), @Dan (DET) - Good news Dan! No wait, this is your team getting rid of decent players in return for future picks (and also giving away one pick though??)
@Stobzilla & @Samid (SAS) - I suspect the Spurs aren't trying to be good.
@P-Nut (MEM), @hobbers (BOS) - This seems very even. It does leave Boston without a great Center, but Kobe though?
@V.O. (NJ) - a "win now" move for the Nets
@weetee (ATL) - I guess that means no Solius-level money for Atlanta next season
@Dr. Dwayne (UTA) - simply unhinged behaviour by Oklahoma
Standings:
Trades:
@Skizzo (IND), @Dan (DET) - Good news Dan! No wait, this is your team getting rid of decent players in return for future picks (and also giving away one pick though??)
@Stobzilla & @Samid (SAS) - I suspect the Spurs aren't trying to be good.
@P-Nut (MEM), @hobbers (BOS) - This seems very even. It does leave Boston without a great Center, but Kobe though?
@V.O. (NJ) - a "win now" move for the Nets
@weetee (ATL) - I guess that means no Solius-level money for Atlanta next season
@Dr. Dwayne (UTA) - simply unhinged behaviour by Oklahoma
That OKC trade is bizarre.
Looks like Lakers no longer top dogs. That's fine though. We won our rings, had the best season of all time, and got paid.
Looks like Lakers no longer top dogs. That's fine though. We won our rings, had the best season of all time, and got paid.
You will at the very least remain the most successful for sometime. I have got a taste for the high life and am retiring this season.
Been carried my entire career so thanks chaps it's all coke and hookers for me from here.
You were both Semi-Finals MVP and Finals MVP in 2006, so I think that one at least was your own doing.
Was looking for myself higher up the league 
fecking Bulls never feck off do they
Never understood why I get paid that much - decent playmaking aside - they could afford a solius kinda player for that dough. Gotta hang with Lebron and maybe make the playoffs- wohoo.
09/10 Trade Deadline Update
09/10 Trade Deadline Update
Oof. That's a lot of red.
Trades
@weetee (ATL) - That's a lot of players.
@Salt Bailly (DET > DEN), @Dan (DEN > DET)
@Samid (SAS > CHA), @Stobzilla (SAS) - that's Samid's 9th different team, making him joint 8th in NBA history for most teams. He's only 28, will he retire or go for the record?
Oof. That's a lot of red.
Trades
@weetee (ATL) - That's a lot of players.
@Salt Bailly (DET > DEN), @Dan (DEN > DET)
@Samid (SAS > CHA), @Stobzilla (SAS) - that's Samid's 9th different team, making him joint 8th in NBA history for most teams. He's only 28, will he retire or go for the record?
@Salt Bailly nice trade mate.
feck this noise.
Thanks for the jinx, @nimic. Hope you're proud of yourself.
Ooh look at us getting ready to just miss out on the playoffs!
@Salt Bailly nice trade mate.
How many ruptured acls do my team have then
Fecking LeBron
Looks like imma have to hodor durant
09/10 All Star Weekend
09/10 All Star Weekend
Standings
Slam Dunk Challenge
Another win by @BenitoSTARR! Suck it, LeBron James, Kevin Durant and Eric Gordon.
3 Point Contest
Another Caf-dominated list of participants, with @Dr. Dwayne, @BenitoSTARR, @P-Nut, @Samid, @hobbers and @V.O.. But can they beat Kyle Korver?
1st Round (4 advance)
Martell Webster: 20
Kyle Korver: 24
23 isn't enough for Samid, he's out.
hobbers is eliminated from his first ever 3 Point Contest.
25 is enough for V.O.! He goes through with BenitoSTARR, P-Nut and Dr. Dwayne. Kyle Korver is out!
2nd Round (2 advance)
Dr. Dwayne is out, and V.O. needs at least 28!
Oof, that's not 28. It will be BenitoSTARR against P-Nut in the final round. The last time that happened was in 2005, and BenitoSTARR won by one point.
Final Round
Very good start! Can P-Nut match it?
Nope! BenitoSTARR is the 3-Point champion for the 5th time, pulling away from Kyle Korver and Solius (who missed out due to injury)
All Star Game
@BenitoSTARR, @hobbers, @V.O. and @Samid return for the East. @Solius barely misses out due to injury.
@P-Nut, @altodevil, @oneniltothearsenal and @Dr. Dwayne return for the West, and @Salt Bailly makes his All Star debut at the tender age of 32.
Standings
Slam Dunk Challenge
Another win by @BenitoSTARR! Suck it, LeBron James, Kevin Durant and Eric Gordon.
3 Point Contest
Another Caf-dominated list of participants, with @Dr. Dwayne, @BenitoSTARR, @P-Nut, @Samid, @hobbers and @V.O.. But can they beat Kyle Korver?
1st Round (4 advance)
Martell Webster: 20
Kyle Korver: 24
23 isn't enough for Samid, he's out.
hobbers is eliminated from his first ever 3 Point Contest.
25 is enough for V.O.! He goes through with BenitoSTARR, P-Nut and Dr. Dwayne. Kyle Korver is out!
2nd Round (2 advance)
Dr. Dwayne is out, and V.O. needs at least 28!
Oof, that's not 28. It will be BenitoSTARR against P-Nut in the final round. The last time that happened was in 2005, and BenitoSTARR won by one point.
Final Round
Very good start! Can P-Nut match it?
Nope! BenitoSTARR is the 3-Point champion for the 5th time, pulling away from Kyle Korver and Solius (who missed out due to injury)
All Star Game
@BenitoSTARR, @hobbers, @V.O. and @Samid return for the East. @Solius barely misses out due to injury.
@P-Nut, @altodevil, @oneniltothearsenal and @Dr. Dwayne return for the West, and @Salt Bailly makes his All Star debut at the tender age of 32.
Bad
Didn‘t realize Denver is dead last. @lebronjames
That was quick
I’ve only checked the caf twice today as well. I always seem to log on the second after you’ve posted
Not exactly taking the East by storm are we. Had similar numbers with the Bobtwats
I’ve only checked the caf twice today as well. I always seem to log on the second after you’ve posted
I'm Truman Show'ing you.
I hear nimic had to move to Fiji on very short notice.
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Dunk, drop and destroyed you all.
Scared of Dallas. Scared of Durant.
09/10 End of Regular Season & Playoff Bracket
09/10 End of Regular Season
@Dan has fallen down the stairs. As a result his overall rating has dropped to 58.
Final Regular Season Standings
East: Of the four Cafite teams who made it, two are in great form (@V.O.'s Nets and @BenitoSTARR's Knicks), and two aren't (@hobbers' Celtics and @weetee's Hawks). That might give us an indication of how the playoffs are going to play out. I'd be worried about those Wizards either way, though.
@Dan missed out barely, fittingly going 50 wins since the last update and 50% for the entire season (though of course he'd be injured for the full playoffs and more anyway). @sebsheep and @Skizzo were never going to make it, but they made a much better impression towards the end of the season regardless. @Samid, @Solius and @reelworld made a different kind of impression.
West: @altodevil and @P-Nut seem to be serious contenders in the West. @Stobzilla's Spurs took quite the leap up the standings since the last update, barely making the playoffs. It's a rather disappointing end of the season for @oneniltothearsenal, @The Cat, @Dr. Dwayne and @Salt Bailly.
League Leaders
Playoff Bracket
Finally, a reminder of the retirement rules. The Cat has already decided to retire at the end of the season. The others who are eligible for early retirement (and reincarnation) are Samid, Skizzo, reelworld and Dan after his injury. You don't have to retire, and you can still win stuff even if you're not top dog. Or, if you're Samid, you could be going for the all time NBA 'most different teams' record.
@Dan has fallen down the stairs. As a result his overall rating has dropped to 58.
Final Regular Season Standings
East: Of the four Cafite teams who made it, two are in great form (@V.O.'s Nets and @BenitoSTARR's Knicks), and two aren't (@hobbers' Celtics and @weetee's Hawks). That might give us an indication of how the playoffs are going to play out. I'd be worried about those Wizards either way, though.
@Dan missed out barely, fittingly going 50 wins since the last update and 50% for the entire season (though of course he'd be injured for the full playoffs and more anyway). @sebsheep and @Skizzo were never going to make it, but they made a much better impression towards the end of the season regardless. @Samid, @Solius and @reelworld made a different kind of impression.
West: @altodevil and @P-Nut seem to be serious contenders in the West. @Stobzilla's Spurs took quite the leap up the standings since the last update, barely making the playoffs. It's a rather disappointing end of the season for @oneniltothearsenal, @The Cat, @Dr. Dwayne and @Salt Bailly.
League Leaders
Playoff Bracket
Finally, a reminder of the retirement rules. The Cat has already decided to retire at the end of the season. The others who are eligible for early retirement (and reincarnation) are Samid, Skizzo, reelworld and Dan after his injury. You don't have to retire, and you can still win stuff even if you're not top dog. Or, if you're Samid, you could be going for the all time NBA 'most different teams' record.