Rules of the United Thread. ( Blue Moon forum - Baby boomers edition)
1) Clock up 25k posts on one thread saying the word 'Rag' over and over, like it actually stings our eyes, which it doesn't. Most United fans find it quite endearing. It's like that Monty Python sketch, "We are the knights who say NI."
2) Say something about Munich. Mostly to deflect away from the horrific tragedy, and paint MUFC in a bad light. Completely ignoring the capabilities and finances available to football clubs in the 1950's.
3) Say something about Louis Edwards meat factory circa 1966. (Louis Edwards has been dead 41 years!)
4) Mention the Martin Edwards toilet cubicle rumour. (Martin Edwards retired 20 years ago!)
5) Try to make Sir Alex Ferguson relevant in every post, and not an 80 year old man who has been retired for 8 years. "I don't care what they say about his brain operation, he's still running that club from his secret lair inside Mere Golf Club."
6) Mention Ryan Giggs/Wayne Rooney shagging habits. They love a bit of tabloid tittle tattle from the daily mail.
7) Act like schoolboys and make up childish non PC names for players and managers. Tranaldo, Camel Gob, Ratboy, Gashford, Slur Alex, Poobag, Slabhead....these are grandparents posting on a football forum at 2am!
8) Every United victory is down to bent refs, the FA, sky sports, UEFA, Rupert Murdoch, the Pope… they even try to find out where the ref is from to find some sort of connection to United. Oddballs!
9) Present random factoids from Gary James, such as,“ In 1906, Earnest Boothroyd was a centre back for the Red Devil’s. They stole this nickname from Salford Rugby club. Earnest was 1792 millimetres tall. Nathan Ake is 1997 millimetres tall. Which is considerably taller than Earnest. Have that you dirty rags! P.S. I was born without a willy.”
10) Repeat all of the above for 50 years, even though the majority of their fans under the age of 30, cringe themselves inside out, every time they trot down this laboriously well worn path