Fair play to you for being honest...I think your post is indicative of the real issues surrounding racism that is a lack of education about what racism actually means.
As you mentioned why isn't racsim on the same level as being fat, ginger or bald. One of the answers lies in history which MANY individuals don't know about. In recent history, yes, recent history, as in there are still people walking around who have seen or witnessed some of the worst types of behaviours and discrimination that human beings can dish out on another human being simply for being black.
When have masses of fat, ginger, bald people been physically, mentally and emotionally persecuted for being what they are? When has that ever happened in history? When has a bald person been put in chains, sent have way across the world, separated from their family, beaten, branded, denied access to basic human care and murdered just for being bald...when has that ever happened? You can put baldness, being overweight or being bald next to the issues that black people have had to and still go through.
Then there is the "yeah but all that happened eons ago! Its not like that now" argument. Many white people dont understand that racism is about "power". Because of the historical element mentioned above the average white person has more power than the average black person. This power can be re-inforced by negative stereotypes, such as black people look like monkeys, golliwogs, prehistoric man etc. This is why we have to be conscious of the stereotypes.
You're born black, you cant change your skin colour, you cant wake up and say oh, I think ill be white today! A bald man can wear a hat or a wig, an overweight person can lose weight and someone who has ginger hair can dye their hair...totally different to being born black.
I'm not trying to attack you with my post, I generally think a lot of decent white people just don't understand because they havent been educated properly and that is the fault of society and the education system specifically. We should be learning this at the school level that there is more to being racist than just saying the N word. In my experience that what I have been realized that many white people only think they are being racist if they mention the N-word or similar words. But its also the negative stereotypes too.