The Redcafe Novel

Today's Update....

redcafe's spastic authors collective said:
Caftards everywhere sang jolly show tunes and danced around spastically like gimptards spasticating wildly and spastically. In the haphazardly hazards of Hazard County, Daisy Duke straddled the hog of Boss Hog repeatedly and enthusiastically chugging Uncle Jesse’s slimey, wrinkled, and revolting todger.

Into the darkness, where pigeons shag transfer muppets without lubrication, were orangutans feeling naked and horny, so testicles exploded into Canadian’s wearing RedFlag’s red flag-embroidered gigaboob. Fountains spewed whiskey everywhere. Led Zeppelin blaring from dolphins blow holes caked with clam chowder and parsnips marinated with KK’s moldy cat vomit. However, KK canoodled with Boy George and licked Mongolian cameltoe excitedly, dribbling all over herself with joy.

MS MSP (who liked to call himself stud although everyone knew the truth) slurped, Marcos swallowed cock deeply as strange Argie’s fellated waffles brought by Topper. Turtle doves spontaneously combusted resulting in mass exuberance without exhilaration. Red Canadian was munching bearded clam. Dick bitch slapped rockers while Twat-Face (Ed. – the long lost cousin of Cabbage-Face) humped Goat-Man aggressively, sweating, stinking, and saying “that is so gay, freaky”.

Racists were beaten by Skralck and bludgeoned busted sofas with a Brassica. Melissa, the slut, was hovering cheeseburgers and squirming like Goat-Man, honoured by this, goat-Man was satisfied. Twat-Face conspired with Peter Kenyon to usurp Goat-Man’s bridge of power.

Meanwhile, Abramovich oiled Cashley’s Tweedy with motor oil.
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