The Redcafe Novel

The latest update.... up to 13 pages now....

Redcafe's Spastic Authors Collective said:
Goat-Man wonders if Cabbage-Face has really died. “Yes” moaned his boy-toy who is also known by many lesbian Power Rangers who call him “The Special One” (aka Mourinho), the cnut-sniffing, dwarf, minge bastard. Deficient in all aspects of life, which sucks and will follow him til the end.

Mr. Darcy rimmed the gay Baz, whilst he is fingering Sol Campbell again and again until he started to pounce on Jose the pea-sized Ihni binni dimi diniwiny anitaime, who ate Cashley’s bushy pubes. Lille is cnutish even while players walk off holding white flags attached to their noses. Le Arse had their rectums pillaged by PSV, who grabbed little Fabregas’ dinkle. The lovely PSV players cheered on Neil Buchanan’s favorite bike forever in ecstacy; however, psycho Bellamy stomped his cock, which throbbed of course. It swam through the gaping asshole of life.

Muskrats, the fathers of Earl, aka “Gray the Gay fecking cnut” A pangolin was ridiculed by a lemur, who is a relative of the so-called Goat-Man, who some believed to be Baz in a mask, who is also believed to support Liverpool, the team of decidedly idiotic, commoners, better known as scousers.

When they arrived from Lille, they assisted in migrating ducks into Benito’s anal whole in Dubai, where it went pear-shaped for all to see. The spermicidal freak nutted, as Dick-head decided to eat large turnips and wank a lot.

At the Reebok Stadium, where El Hadji Diouf was diving into Lampard’s groin because he likes the fat man’s balls across his tongue, Roman Abramovich was excited by the milky tits of goats. Of all the scousers and mustachioed thieves, the rat-faced Ivan Lendl shit on the heads of those known as Geordies.

From another dynasty, which eats the sphincters out of camels owned by Roman, the butt-plug sniffing commie bastard fellated Drogba while Bazalini masturbated and rimmed Lumpard and Robben behind the old oak tree. There Ronaldinwhore, Goat-Man, Sven Goran Eriksson, Lumpard, and even Sly Stallone daisy-chained around a Christmas tree covered in hallucinogenics.

Watching the Rent Boys fisting each other, provoked Thierry Henry’s miniature penis to droop like a bratwurst rotting away in the upper echelons of George Bush’s rectum. Meanwhile in Lille, Goat-Man struck again by exposing Balloonless as a shameless arsehole again.

Whenever possible, hairy palms ravage the surface of Vlad’s buttocks, which is a frightening and gay experience. Vlad wishing he was Richardson, dribbled the ball past Terry and took it over the goal. Vlad, who is a sweaty, cheating knob of the highest order, liked imposing standards on deckchairs.

Dwarves trembled in the presence of leprechauns, then began riding and licking the smoldering bastard’s bread knife. Kenyon who is a whimpering cum-stain muscle, known as the cummiest cum-stain that broke the cum-stain record, then licked his bread knife.

Miracles prolapsed through the work of Roman the Fifth, who enjoys devouring sphincters. Doing so mostly to get the finest juices of sperm available, he dribbled over Cluade Puel, the most famous wanker of all wanktards, which is associated with Scottish lunatics and drug dealers.

Scousers, including Penis-Head, are the reason to prevent the painful screwing of Man-Shitty, the homosexual, incestuous, and infectious bastards.

Goat-Man raped Twat-Face (Cabbage-Face’s cousin) with reptilian pleasure, unlike insectoids spreading manure gleefully over Goat-Man’s mustache. There was an unexpected discovery of dildos, repeatedly in motion inside pussies that had been viciously rammed into Cabbage-Face before his death.

Meanwhile, Eric Braamhaar (the referee of MUFC v Lille) disguised as an assassin who was womanizing Jennifer Aniston, who is a big fan of ducks and Llama-Man. The llamas conquered south Wales, which resulted in the horrific felching of handbag crabs.

Cashley Cole pretends he is a bad ass, but is really a pussy, who loves taking George Michael and Tweedy from behind, which encouraged lapses in judgment. The conspiracy theory, which is latent to the other side of the world-wide network of side-networkers, who took advantage of drugged-up Britney Spears, who enjoys anal fisting.
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Dresilved said:
captivated,

(very sad that cabbage face is dead BTW, this could turn into an episode of 24, whos next, goat-man FFS, please not)
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Editor said:
Editor's Note - Cabbage-Face apparently died early on at the hand's of Goat-Man, but there has been many hints that this may not be the case and that Cabbage-Face survived and is waiting for his time to strike....
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pangolins
 
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