RAWK Goes Into Meltdown (2011/2012)

He's right.
Leeds won the last "first division championship" in 1992.
Man Utd won the first premiership in 1993.

I love the He's right. A He that doesn't exist.
 
Olly said:
It's amazing how many of them have apparently had conversations like that with United supporters :rolleyes:
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It really is, the amount of times i've read about a supposed conversation with a united fan from liverpool fans.
Its almost as if they make it up.
 
Badunk said:
The story of Manchester United vs Liverpool

A thread about a fictional conversation with a fictional United fan, in which the Rawkite author mocks the fictional 'manc' for his lack of knowledge,
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:lol: x 10.000!

Now I have a new fanfic favourite!

Me: It was. You see, he stretches his hand one metre away from his body and the shot was on target
Him: But the ref didn’t give it, so it wasn’t intentional
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Old favourite --

"R2-D2 aproached Optimus and asked permission to land.

"Granted my fellow cilindrical pal, you can enter my dark caves of mystery." said Optimus.

"Blip Blop Blop!" said R2-D2. This was his first time fecking a robot. He was completely virgin, and was very ashamed he had to expose his intimacy in front of an audience of millions. But their lifes were at stake, so he must swallow all of his prejudcies and engage full head in this life altering experience."
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Fan Fiction Friday: Optimus Prime and Princess Leia in "Love Beyond Circuits, Love Beyond Flesh" - Topless Robot

ETA: :lol: at Steve & absolutely losing it at --
Me: What did you expect Drama Queen? We were playing Manchester United. If I wanted a more educated conversation, then I will travel to the pre-season friendly game against Rapid Vienna.
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Olly said:
Yep, Evra deserves abuse for being racially abused...
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And 'actually racist', that's a new one.

Let's turn away from the bigoted idiocy for a moment and indulge in the pure idiocy of Liverpool fanfic --

hitnrock@RAWK said:
Me: I'm a liverpool fan. who do u support???
Him: I support united..sheh mahn you support shit team.
Me: We're the most celebrated club in england.
Him: Whatever man!!
Me: I bet you don't know shit about your own team.
Him: I do.
Me: Okay so tell me, who was your *best* striker when you won the European Cup for the first time?
Me: Take a guess.
Him: Rooney?
Me: Ha Ha Ha.
Him: I don't know, you tell me.
Me: Its best.
Him: Yes but who is it?
Me: Dude, Its Best.
Him: Yeah, I know you are talking about the best striker, but who is it?
Me: You dumbfeck, Its George Best.
Him: Who's that?
Me: Your real dad.
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The story of Manchester United vs Liverpool

That whole thread is unbelievable.

ETA: More to come! "The dialogue can be much better, so I will update with new (real) conversations from time to time." \o/
 
that thread puts the "my black mate said..." quotes into an interesting context.
 
Me: How long have you been supporting Manchester United?
Him: Always
Me: From when was that?
Him: Since the beginning
Me: Of the match?
Him: No, since the beginning of the Premier League
Me: Who did you support when it was known as the First Division?
Him: I only watch the Premier League. So – Manchester. They won it first
Me: Leeds
Him: No, I told you, I don’t watch the First Division. Only the Premier League
Me: Don’t you remember Leeds winning the Premiership?
Him: I bet you Leeds never won. The First Division maybe.
Me: You don’t remember them in even the Champions League?
Him: Of course that’s when I first started to watch football years ago. I don’t know how these teams get in it, but they didn’t even win the league! It supposed to be a Champions League so how can it be when you are not even a champion?
Me: Never mind. That was never a penalty! Clear dive there.
Him: There must have been some contact.
Me: No contact at all. Look at the replay.
Him: But the ref has given it so it must be a penalty
Me: If the ref has given it doesn’t mean it should be a penalty
Him: 1-0 to United. Hahahahha.
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Outwitted by a fictional United supporter of his own creation... :lol:
 
Somewhere in Liverpool tonight, a grown man is talking to a sock with a face drawn on it.
 
Me: (Extremely frustrated but remain focused, giving him a full analysis during the last beer)
Him: (in response)… but, we won. And, you lost. Hahahahah.

Back home with the wife...
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Wow, this guy gets to drink imaginary beers with an imaginary United supporting friend and has an imaginary home with an imaginary wife. Plus a real account on RAWK. This guy truly has it all, doesn't he.
 
Yes, but he was right Leeds have never won the Premier League though.
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Hmmm. Thanks for the correction. My slip up on the season dates there. I was meant to double check before posting, but was in a hurry
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Yes, he had to get to an imaginary meeting with an imaginary Everton supporter straight afterwards.
 
SteveJ said:
Somewhere in Liverpool tonight, a grown man is talking to a sock with a face drawn on it.
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And losing the argument.

Personally I'm looking forward to the much better (real) new dialogue, although I don't think it's humanly possible to top his current effort.

"Me: (In depth tactical analysis).
Him: (In response to my tactical commentary) I don’t know about that"
 
Andy @ Allerton said:
I don't hate Manchester United. They are like little pebbles caught upon a rocky beach. Little pebbles that have rocked and rolled and milled around for ages, but then were picked up for a few minutes by a crosseyed gimp of a flying squirrel with peanuts on its mind. They were dragged hither and thither then finally they were plucked and put atop a little pile of marbes cunningly constructed by a wandering albatross. At one time a little shoal of fish used to follow the little pebbles as they swilled around, but they couldn't get onto the beach, so the albatross knowing a good thing sold them to a giant wombat. The giant wombat started getting lots of little baby pebbles and sticking them on and attached loads of cunningly constructed helium packets to keep them bobbing about at the top. All this bobbing about attracted lots of little diseased bats that flew from dark caves and they wondered and goggled at the little dancing packets keeping the little pebble afloat. The little fish weren't happy about this and some went off and made a new little pebble which swished and swooshed and rolled around their little pond. But more and more cross eyed demented bats oggled the little floating ball help up by its little packets.
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What I glean from that incomprehensible story is that whatever happens, United will always be at the top. Nice to see they're coming to accept that in a round about way.
 
I like the fact that even in a fictionalised version of his life, the pillock still manages to feck up getting laid.
 
Why would you give your wife a tactical analysis of a football game instead of having sex with her? Why?
 
Even if it's totally true, which is highly unlikely, he's equating one unknowledgable fan to all united fans.

Not sure I'd consider Best to be a 'striker' at any rate.
 
Andy @ Allerton
Spoke to my mate that works at the club. Police have discovered that there is a plan for hundreds of Manchester United fans are going to try and smuggle in pillow cases with eye holes cut out into the ground. Police have orders to confiscate such items.
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:wenger:
 
Lastwolf said:
Even if it's totally true, which is highly unlikely, he's equating one unknowledgable fan to all united fans.

Not sure I'd consider Best to be a 'striker' at any rate.
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When I read the question the name that came into my head was Denis Law. I always associated Best more as an off the front player or winger rather than a striker.
 
Xander45 said:
When I read the question the name that came into my head was Denis Law. I always associated Best more as an off the front player or winger rather than a striker.
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Yep, in modern terms he'd probably be a wing forward or in a Messi type role. I've only seen highlights but I don't think he really had a great game in the '68 final either. John Aston on the other hand was taking them apart. I really must watch it in its entirety one day.
 
A@A said:
You don't know much about the English media mate. If the Mancs wore Klu-Klux-Klan stuff then the media on Sunday would report it as the Liverpool fans wearing it. They'd probably edit on Liverpool shirts as well - remember Sky editing the flag when Hodgson took over and digitially adding his face?
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:lol::lol:

What a comparison!
 
That'sHernandez said:
Yep, in modern terms he'd probably be a wing forward or in a Messi type role. I've only seen highlights but I don't think he really had a great game in the '68 final either. John Aston on the other hand was taking them apart. I really must watch it in its entirety one day.
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Yes you must!

And that's what's struck me on both my viewings too... Aston was running past them for fun.

Was also great to see whenever Eusebio woke up for a 15 sec spell of brilliance the odd couple of times as well.
 
It's incredible how they feel the need to create these stories about "fans who clearly aren't fans".

That fictional exchange must have taken the guy an age to construct and for what?

I do like the fact he's created a story to highlight another group of supporters' lack of footballing knowledge whilst dropping a bollock on the fact Leeds have never won the Premiership. Ironic.
 
Sorry, but did that fictional United supporter justoutwit the scouse gimp who made him up in the first place? This is really unbelievable stuff.
 
Today, the scousers further embarrassed themselves in full view of the world. Good job, boys.
 
Have King Kenny made Slur alex drink 'til his nose turns red now? Tactically outsmarted by the King himself, Slur didnt realise the genious plan to allow themselves to be outplayed during the entire game, only to wait for Evra to mess up which now means that Suarez was right all along. #Justice
 
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