Predict when we next have a normal game

At this point, I firmly believe if we somehow went 4-0 in the first 15 minutes, an asteroid will strike Earth at minute 20, end all life on Earth, just to deny us the satisfaction of having a 4 goal lead against someone.
 
I think we all need to adopt a different mindset and stop chasing something that isn't there anymore. Take a step back, catch our breath and build something new. Something dynamic, built around our youth players with a blend of experience.

*Gary Neville voice* "But this is MANCHESTER UNITED, we HAVE to be challenging for titles and in the Champions League. It's unthinkable to have a few years in the shadows"

No it's not, we are already in the shadows. And we need to stop living off that name and past glories and start putting the work in that other clubs have so clearly adopted.

We are chasing the likes of Brighton because we are trying to stay at the top by buying in 30 year olds and paying them 300k per week. This is not sustainable. You need to have a conveyor belt of young and hungry players coming through. Players who have been developed to slot into a defined system and style of play. Players who are so well drilled that they can replace any of the starting 11 without any drop off in performance.

Newcastle did this last week and beat us on our own ground. With 7 first teamers out.

Teams who rely on individuals don't win anything anymore. We are proof of this. We need to move on from this cycle and go back to what we used to do really well. Find good young players, develop them and become successful.

I'm willing to give it time, because this current bunch is going nowhere. We all need to accept that.
 
That wolves "penalty" will haunt us until boxing day. Then it will be normal again.
 
At this rate, it'll something totally against the norm like Bayern at home or something.
That actually wouldn't be all that surprising - Bayern is through in first place so they will probably just play a fully rotated squad.
 
This season really gives me paranoid over some decisions. Would be okay if there was a sense of consistency but there isn't...
 
That actually wouldn't be all that surprising - Bayern is through in first place so they will probably just play a fully rotated squad.
From previous season, I wouldn't trust Bayern to show us mercy. I meant last year was not the first time Barcelona crashed down to EL. Bayern destroyed Barcelona in last match day despite already guaranteed top of the group after 5 victories! Same thing happened last season where they won all their group games again.
 
Normal is boring.

We all wanted Erik for excitement, not for boredom!
 
The team is struggling to be functional so I don't think we'll see one for a long time. Our only route to winning is battling and scrapping a result.

I've watched Luton a bit this season and I have a feeling they are going to cause us problems. Morris is the sort of striker Evans will struggle against. People will be expecting us to attack all game and blow them away which is something this team isn't capable of without leaving giant holes at the back.
 
That actually wouldn't be all that surprising - Bayern is through in first place so they will probably just play a fully rotated squad.
You nearly gave me hope but then @ti vu swept in to make sure we don't count our chickens before they hatch :D
 
I actually thought we played really well against Spurs for about 25-30 minutes, looked fluid, maintained attacks, just didn't take any chances.
Luton I reckon will finally be a comfortable win.
 
To have a normal game, we need to have extended control/possession of the ball. Players like Bruno, Dalot, McT, Rashford, etc. do not allow for that, as risk taking is a nature of their game (Bruno, Rashford) or they are s*** (Dalot or McT).

It seems this is how ETH wants us to play, high risk quick transitions. Problem is we lose the ball too often, cannot win it quick enough like a Liverpool, cannot defend well when teams come at us and lose composure under any adversity.

So the answer to your question, we can have a normal game when we play a team like Palace's second team that can't be bothered as overcoming the issues above will take a lot of time, possibly more than a season.
 
From previous season, I wouldn't trust Bayern to show us mercy. I meant last year was not the first time Barcelona crashed down to EL. Bayern destroyed Barcelona in last match day despite already guaranteed top of the group after 5 victories! Same thing happened last season where they won all their group games again.

Yeah City were last team to beat them in the Champions League group stages
 
It really is crazy isn’t it. The Burnley game was the closest to a routine win and they are barely a PL team.

Even at our worst under previous managers we still found a way to sneak in a decent win in between the rot.
 
You know whats the definion of a normal game? For me I guess its a normal 2 0 win against midtable opposition controling the game and us fans not stressing about it after say 70 minutes of a dominant display. And its not coming anytime soon.
 
Maybe next time!

Hmm, I thought that was fairly comfortable in terms of overall play even if the final score was 1-0.

Our players are still donkeys in or around the box though, which makes the games unnecessarily tight.
 
Anything but normal :lol:
They had loads of pot shots, maybe one or two clear cuts. We were clinical enough, did enough, tough to beat. Id say thats one of the most routine 3-0 wins you'll ever get against a side as good as everton.
 
So revising this since we did score one of the greatest Premier League goals of all time it wasn’t that normal. Then the Gala game absolutely batshit as usual. Still waiting for a normal one.
 
At this rate, it'll something totally against the norm like Bayern at home or something.
I'm still sticking with this ^^

Just because we're so damn unpredictable, I feel like it'll happen in the one game you wouldn't expect it to.
 
OP should be updated with our results to date.
 
Wigan was perfectly normal.

The complete overanalysis of a straightforward cup game has been bizarre.
 
I wouldn't count Wigan as it's a rare strike from a defender. We made it very hard work to overcome a league one side.

It was a normal game for current United facing a lower team, a defender/midfielder scoring to salvage a poor attacking display. We're desperate for goals in the PL and really struggled here. We need to be facing 9 players and a keeper on crutches to score freely.
 
Surely by now it's obvious that what you mean by "normal" is anything but that, this season. It's all the exceptions you note that is normal, and they all tell essentially the same story: We're a mid-table team. The sort of team that consistently lose against good teams, and that normally have to work hard to beat lower half sides. And only get workmanlike, safe wins when facing opponents worse than that again, such as the second-string version of Palace at Trafford in the Carabao Cup, or Wigan.

The only big exception from that overall picture this season is the win against Villa.
 
I wouldn't count Wigan as it's a rare strike from a defender. We made it very hard work to overcome a league one side.

It was a normal game for current United facing a lower team, a defender/midfielder scoring to salvage a poor attacking display. We're desperate for goals in the PL and really struggled here. We need to be facing 9 players and a keeper on crutches to score freely.
Dalot scoring a curler is as much of a "standard" goal as it can get when it comes to current United side really. It's his second of the season so it might be our second most effective attacking "pattern of play", just behind McTominay thriving in chaos in the box.