poster origins

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fishfingers15 - you know the kid you went to school with? he'd be about 15. always said he got loads of action and lost his virginity at 7 to a swedish supermodel whilst he was holidaying there with his family? fishfinger had a sheltered upbringing. home by half 5 for din dins and tucked up in bed by 7 so he was bright and ready for his studies the next day. for a while his two friends tolerated his wild, fabricated tales of sex with the two twins who lived next door to him yet no one ever saw or the extreme amount of vag he regularly got on nights out despite spending all his spare time doing homework or watching soaps with his mum. this was until they both got girlfriends and spoke of the intimate moments they shared with them. over the next few weeks he gleaned various bits of information from them and slowly built up a library of things he could do to be more convincing with his stories. one such juicy bit of information lead him to tesco's. he brought a month’s supply of fresh fish and every night and for an hour before school he'd stroke it with one of his hands and prod into its body with his fingers. this helped him win over his doubters and made his story of fingering one of the teachers behind the bike sheds more creditable. he may be on the caf now yes. but you can guarantee he's thinking of more elaborate stories to convince people he's a stud yet always wondering just why it is girls don't like him.
 
rimaldo said:
fishfingers15 - you know the kid you went to school with? he'd be about 15. always said he got loads of action and lost his virginity at 7 to a swedish supermodel whilst he was holidaying there with his family? fishfinger had a sheltered upbringing. home by half 5 for din dins and tucked up in bed by 7 so he was bright and ready for his studies the next day. for a while his two friends tolerated his wild, fabricated tales of sex with the two twins who lived next door to him yet no one ever saw or the extreme amount of vag he regularly got on nights out despite spending all his spare time doing homework or watching soaps with his mum. this was until they both got girlfriends and spoke of the intimate moments they shared with them. over the next few weeks he gleaned various bits of information from them and slowly built up a library of things he could do to be more convincing with his stories. one such juicy bit of information lead him to tesco's. he brought a month’s supply of fresh fish and every night and for an hour before school he'd stroke it with one of his hands and prod into its body with his fingers. this helped him win over his doubters and made his story of fingering one of the teachers behind the bike sheds more creditable. he may be on the caf now yes. but you can guarantee he's thinking of more elaborate stories to convince people he's a stud yet always wondering just why it is girls don't like him.
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lol::lol::lol:
 
Spoony! said:
Good stuff, Rimmo - you sister loving human being you.
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well someone's got to love her. the fact she looks like me only with longer hair and smaller breasts means she doesn't exactly get the attention from the boys. well not ones willing to sleep with her anyway. that's where me and her differ.
 
rimaldo said:
my uncle only lets me out of the cage every so often then it's soon time to get back in there and present myself through the bars again :(
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your uncle lets me watch though, he has promised me a cage someday too, i cant wait for that moment!:D
 
that's me spent for the day. will add more soon.
 
Xander45 said:
I'm not surprised! Considering it is common knowledge that after each post you make you have a congratulatory wank, i'm surprised you haven't passed out.
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you just had to make me reply and attempt one more didn't you? it's red raw for crying out loud!
 
if anyone else wants one register your interest and i'll see what i can do at a later date. perhaps this evening, probably tomorrow.
 
:lol:

Where's mine rim? I hope the Institution is briefly mentioned!
 
Just checked your 'About me' page rim,

Demi-God - Co-Founder of The Institution Of Rot Revolution.

:lol:

I knew you wouldn't forget.
 
pierluigi_collina.jpg
 
rimaldo said:
decotron - a 35 year old american man with not much of a life. he sits on the internet all day long debating transformers and his personal belief that the newly made films let down the original cartoon. he lives in his mother's basement which of course, is transformer themed. duvet sets, posters, memorabilia, the lot. over the years and many cardboard boxes and spare parts from washing machines later he has built himself his own transformers costume. he is decotron. he wears it every day and never leave his computer chair, even though the cardboard is sodden with body fluids. he only ever leaves his chair when he believes he has found new evidence in the press that locates the all spark. he sits reading the first letter of every line of every story until he can get some kind of conceivable location to go and search for the all spark, that is unless he isn’t grounded by his mother or still has chores around the house that need doing. over the years he has perfected the sound of the transformation used in the films. unfortunately the women don’t seem to be as turned on by it as he does.
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:lol::lol::lol: im touched
 
godlovesunited - the son of a preacher man. born and raised in the deep south gld would attend the church his dad ranted on about religion in and frequently joined in the hallelujahs. some say he shouted this the loudest. with the word of god in his heart and united in his soul he set out to make a life of his own and to this day spreads peace and love throughout the world. or so he'd have us believe for gld actually lives a double life. by day he is the humble son of a preacher man. by night a sexual deviant. one so disturbed he pays homeless people in beer to watch him as he touches himself. one so depraved he'll have sex with any animal, vegetable or mineral. one so twisted that not even god himself could love him. if only his dad knew how much he had let him down.
 
adzzutd – narcoleptic with a passion for necrophilia. a dangerous combination and one he all too often gets in trouble for. asleep whilst hunched over a lifeless corpse in a morgue or in a graveyard is where you'll most likely find him, as do the police most mornings. they have given up prosecuting him for his crimes as it’s hard to make a dead person give evidence and even when they do manage to get to court they are usually too scared by the threats made by zzzz during his sleep affected humpings. some of them are just grateful for the attention and don’t mind it. one day he decided to search for “having sex with dead people” in google. the first 4 pages of hits led him straight to the profile of a certain espadaydaga on a site called redcafe. ever since this narcoleptic necrophilia has posted on this forum, forever wishing to find likeminded people with the same problem as him. he just wants to know how to stay awake whilst defiling dead people. he doesn’t think it’s much to ask.
 
collina - bald, italian referee and shining beacon of hope to rednome that a bald man can in fact still lead a normal life and be worthy of his existence and place in society. really simple yes? no. in reality it was not the bald headed, whistle blowing card loving italian that was being heralded when collina joined redcafe no. it was a heat magazine loving, cross dressing, dyslexic man who loved nothing more than rushing out to the shops the moment he woke up on thursdays to buy heat magazine and read up about the latest zany shopping escapades of her favourite wag, coleen rooney. unfortunately his crippling learning difficulties, dyslexia and raging homosexuality led him to make a rather ill-fated typo and ever since collina has claimed to be a fan of the bald ref to avoid mockery. in truth he sits at home wearing women’s clothes and dreaming that one day he’ll be as pretty as coleen.
 
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