How many goals could YOU score up front for United in a season?

[harms]

Playing like that would ruin the build-up and your team would be constantly under pressure essentially playing with 10 men all match long. That strategy would be a sure fire way to score 0.

It absolutely would and in a real world you’d get benched (or, rather, thrown out). But if your goal is to score the most without any regard for team’s results, you’d probably be able to score a couple. If your goal is to help the team the most then I’d say 1-2 is my absolute maximum (with 0 goals being my most realistic result).

The difference between your goals scored and goals you’re going to cost a team is going to be brutal though.

 

[tomaldinho1]

We recently played 60 minutes with 10 men at Old Trafford against the 20th in the table. We looked dreadful and never looked like scoring.

Unless by 'ok level' you mean full professional, then no, you'd barely get a sniff, let alone multiple chances every game. We only scored 41 goals this season in the league, and that's without some semi-pro chancer holding us back (insert Weghorst joke here). Meaning our actual professional top level forwards struggled to get chances.

Ok but that’s one game. In this scenario I’m assuming you’re always starting and playing like 60games, plus we were in Europa this year so you got games versus Tiraspol and Nicosia. I think you could take someone who played semi pro is still fit and is under 35 and they could get a single goal. Striker is quite a unique position for this question in that you can just hang around the box, you might not be man marked and there’s a higher degree of luck for things like deflections from a freekicks or a corner gets knocked down and then if you get only a few of those half chances, usually all it takes it getting a good connection.

If this question was being a CB could you keep a single clean sheet I’d genuinely think it was impossible because the opposition would target you and any striker would have you for breakfast literally every time they tried.

 

[MackRobinson]

It absolutely would and in a real world you’d get benched (or, rather, thrown out). But if your goal is to score the most without any regard for team’s results, you’d probably be able to score a couple. If your goal is to help the team the most then I’d say 1-2 is my absolute maximum (with 0 goals being my most realistic result).

The difference between your goals scored and goals you’re going to cost a team is going to be brutal though.

My point is even if you did play the entire match you would be so starved of chances, and if you include the fact that a non-professional player wouldn't have the physical or technical attributes to take advantage of those opportunities, anything more than a flukey goal seems like a stretch. If WW looks this bad the average person would look considerable work in the PL.

 

[OrcaFat]

Never noticed this brilliant thread. Assuming I play every available minute, I think we’d get a few corners and one time I’d get some kind of flukey tap in.

Otherwise I tend to agree with the skeptics. I wouldn’t get many chances and my being on the pitch would condemn us to defeat every week. (Similar to, but even worse than, our current form.)