Football phrases that grinds your gears

Yeah, that makes more sense, as it shows that something is being affected by a happening yet is not disturbed by it quite as much.

Thanks.
Resistance is rarely absolute, it's almost always relative. Try typing "relative resistance" into Google (the quotation marks ensure that it is an exact phrase match). My search a moment ago delivered over 770,000 matches.
 
There are clearly degrees of resistance, I'm sure we can all agree.
Indeed it is. That's why you can measure resistance. If the only definition of resistance was absolute, this wouldn't be the case.
 
Heard it last night and have never understood where it came from.

"He didn't get enough purchase on it?".
This is a good one imo. I know where it comes from, it's the Force imparted by using a lever to loosen something but why that has anything to do with the beautiful game.

Sounds like someone is just trying to absolutely lump it into orbit. Hardly tippy-tappy tiki-taka.
 
Resistance is rarely absolute, it's almost always relative. Try typing "relative resistance" into Google (the quotation marks ensure that it is an exact phrase match). My search a moment ago delivered over 770,000 matches.
It's absolute when used as such, like 'that player is press resistant'
That's an absolute.
'that player is press resilient ' is a far better option and means far more.
 
It's absolute when used as such, like 'that player is press resistant'
That's an absolute.
'that player is press resilient ' is a far better option and means far more.
You’re engaging in circular reasoning. The point being made by several people is that the phrase “press resistant” is not absolute because the word “resistant” is rarely absolute. You seem to be arguing that it is absolute… because it is.

Almost all references to resistance are relative. Heat resistance, air resistance, electrical resistance, toxin resistance. A thing can be more or less resistant than another thing. That’s the very definition of relative and the opposite of an absolute.

Humour me; Google “relative resistance”. Have a read of one of the thousands of papers and articles containing the phrase. I think you’ll find it interesting.
 
I'm sure it's come up somewhere in the 29 pages and I couldn't be arsed looking for it, but I despise the term "bragging rights".
 
You’re engaging in circular reasoning. The point being made by several people is that the phrase “press resistant” is not absolute because the word “resistant” is rarely absolute. You seem to be arguing that it is absolute… because it is.

Almost all references to resistance are relative. Heat resistance, air resistance, electrical resistance, toxin resistance. A thing can be more or less resistant than another thing. That’s the very definition of relative and the opposite of an absolute.

Humour me; Google “relative resistance”. Have a read of one of the thousands of papers and articles containing the phrase. I think you’ll find it interesting.
To use resistant implies that person is not affected by press.
Yet they are.
They have to amend their play, their outcomes and choices based on the press. Hence they are affected by it.
 
Another phrase I've seen today in here:

'First phase midfielder'

That is complete hogwash to me.
I can understand phases of play, but a 'first phase' player simply does not exist, if it did then that midfielder is only doing part of their job.
 
The use of "at the double" whenever someone scores two goals. It's so overused in football journalism but is almost never used in real life as it is so antiquated. Do young people even know what it refers to any more?
 
A lot of these cliches state the obvious and one that springs to mind is, 'he won't be happy when he watches that back in the dressing room...' Like first of all it's totally obvious that he 'won't be happy' and secondly do players ever watch themselves missing chances, getting sent off unless the coach forces them to in training? It's not exactly the first thing they'll do.
 
Last edited:
The use of "at the double" whenever someone scores two goals. It's so overused in football journalism but is almost never used in real life as it is so antiquated. Do young people even know what it refers to any more?

Tell us Grandad
 
The use of "at the double" whenever someone scores two goals. It's so overused in football journalism but is almost never used in real life as it is so antiquated. Do young people even know what it refers to any more?

Is that phrase ever used?
 
A "honest player" is a description that I don't really like.

In theory, it should be a huge compliment - implying the player has more scruples or ethics than others, and plays fairly by the rules unlike 'dishonest' ones.

In reality, what it's actually used for is to describe a player with limited abilities but whose main attribute is to run around a lot, or 'put themselves about' physically as a pretty rough player.

You're not going to hear it near the top of the list of attributes of many Ballon d'Or candidates, as you start with far more impressive ones before working down to that as almost a last resort. It's the equivalent of those trophies they give to pretty poor but enthusiastic players at club level like 'clubman of the year'.
 
Last edited:
When a commentator says “he needs to be putting that between the goals” or “he’s got his back to his own goals”.

Andy Townsend was a serial offender.
 
im sure its been mentioned already, but I cant stand describing a player as a "rolls royce". always seems to be about van dijk!
 
"Last goal win the game" said at the 90th+ minute with no team currently winning. Shut the feck up.
 
A "honest player" is a description that I don't really like.

In theory, it should be a huge compliment - implying the player has more scruples or ethics than others, and plays fairly by the rules unlike 'dishonest' ones.

In reality, what it's actually used for is to describe a player with limited abilities but whose main attribute is to run around a lot, or 'put themselves about' physically as a pretty rough player.

You're not going to hear it near the top of the list of attributes of many Ballon d'Or candidates, as you start with far more impressive ones before working down to that as almost a last resort. It's the equivalent of those trophies they give to pretty poor but enthusiastic players at club level like 'clubman of the year'.
I'm glad that's not just me. You get it in other sports too, say when someone is getting battered at snooker or darts but keeps trying their best, 'keeping their opponent honest'. Not sure why it's not 'honest' to beat an opponent who has capitulated because you've battered them into submission.

It's generally used by the same calibre of pundit who says 'stonewall' penalty, demonstrating they have a loose grasp of the definitions of words of more than one syllable.
 
It's not really a saying, but what annoys me is when you hear fans/pundits/commentators refer to players either 'lost his smile' or 'got his smile back'

Like who gives a flying feck. Roy Keane never smiled, most united players didn't smile in our dominant years.

Football is so cringy now with how it's talked about especially in the media
 
"Cute Pass" - Glen Hoddle
Pluralising of players especially in a Cockney accent on Talksport/Merson/Redknapp - "ya got ya Wooneys, Ferdinaaands etc
 
  • Like
Reactions: 711
"Cute Pass" - Glen Hoddle
Pluralising of players especially in a Cockney accent on Talksport/Merson/Redknapp - "ya got ya Wooneys, Ferdinaaands etc
And the indefinite article too, 'what you get with a Rooney is ..'

I suspect it may be where English is a second language but not sure. Or it could be cockneys, which amounts to the same thing.