Erling Haaland / signs for Dortmund

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I’ve heard that we were going to re-sign Michael Keane last summer but this was vetoed by Haaland Snr as he wouldn’t allow the possibility of a Haaland playing in the same team as a Keane as it brought back his PTSD.

This thread is laughable.
You forgot the part where Haaland Snr told United to loan Mike Smalling so He wouldn't be stealing Haaland's spots in penalty area during corners.
 
Are people still going on about when the English four-piece band Keane tied Alf Haaland to a dentist's chair and took baseball bats to his right knee, while wearing Man Utd shirts and making Erling watch? For god's sake get over it.
 
Are people still going on about when the English four-piece band Keane tied Alf Haaland to a dentist's chair and took baseball bats to his right knee, while wearing Man Utd shirts and making Erling watch? For god's sake get over it.
That’s a new theory.

I thought Keane were a bit limp to do that
 
That’s a new theory.

I thought Keane were a bit limp to do that

Keane have released a new album and are out touring again. I doubt you hear many of their tunes in Germany, which is still dominated by David Hasselhoff.

That’s a far safer place for the young Haaland to play. Every time Haaland Snr. hears Somewhere Only We Know, he falls to the floor clutching his knee, that cannot be good for his son to see week in/ week out.
 
Keane have released a new album and are out touring again. I doubt you hear many of their tunes in Germany, which is still dominated by David Hasselhoff.

That’s a far safer place for the young Haaland to play. Every time Haaland Snr. hears Somewhere Only We Know, he falls to the floor clutching his knee, that cannot be good for his son to see week in/ week out.
This is Eddie Izzard type comedy here :lol:
 
I’ve heard that we were going to re-sign Michael Keane last summer but this was vetoed by Haaland Snr as he wouldn’t allow the possibility of a Haaland playing in the same team as a Keane as it brought back his PTSD.

This thread is laughable.
No, no. This thread is dead serious. You shouldn’t be starting rumours, though.
 
I hope we stay away and give more chances to Greenwood. Martial is a good enough ST and Greenwood is the future. We don't need another striker conundrum. Get a RW, CAM, CM or DM.
 
I’m dubious about these foreign next big thing players. Depay still grates with me. All the promise but I the end he was average at best. Seen a couple of videos of the Alfie’s lad but who was he playing against? Certainly wouldn’t spend £70m and £200k a week on such a youngster. What would you think if you were Mason Greenwood and this lad turned up on much more money?
 
I hope we stay away and give more chances to Greenwood. Martial is a good enough ST and Greenwood is the future. We don't need another striker conundrum. Get a RW, CAM, CM or DM.

We should still go for him if he wants to come here because we need a squad & a good collection of different quality strikers - I reckon Ole is building towards a 352

Rashford/Martial - Haaland/Greenwood
--------------------Sancho/Martial--------------
Mcneil - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - James

I think that's manageable as a squad.
 
I hope we stay away and give more chances to Greenwood. Martial is a good enough ST and Greenwood is the future. We don't need another striker conundrum. Get a RW, CAM, CM or DM.

Do you not remember when Martial was injured? Greenwood is good but not ready for that kind of responsibility yet. And when we change Martial, the game dies.

We need another striker, whether it's Haaland or not. There's enough gametime to go around.
 
Need a new left back and a couple of CM's before we add to the front line. Greenwood is class anyway. He's a goal scoring prodigy. Only Sancho scored more goals this season out of any teenager.
 
Need a new left back and a couple of CM's before we add to the front line. Greenwood is class anyway. He's a goal scoring prodigy. Only Sancho scored more goals this season out of any teenager.
Haaland is still a teenager.
 
For me, he gets on the end of that McTominay cross in the first half.
 
I'm really struggling to understand the logic behind some of the arguments against signing Haaland. Just look at the state of the attackers we had on the pitch in the last 25-30 minutes. Absolutely shocking quality and real lack of depth. Haaland gives us a proper option and he adds much needed depth to the forward department. We can't compete just with the ones we have. That's asking for trouble with injuries, burnout, complacency etc.

Some people seem to think that forwards are like goalkeepers, that you only can use one at a time and the others have to rot on the bench. A club like United should be playing 55+ games every season. Assuming a best case scenario where we have double cover in every position and miraculously no injuries at all through the season, that still means 40+ appearances for even the bench attackers.
 
Yeah look at our midfield, we need some other bodies.

Rashford, James, Martial, Grenwood and Haaland would be ideal. They would compete for places and we would have cover for injuries. Then for the big games, the players playing best get the call.

Sees a good step forward to me. Now about the CM position during this window...
 
If we do bring him to the club then all well and good but a player that has scored a lot of goals in the Norwegian and Swiss leagues hardly gets my pulse racing and I think Mame Diouf was prolific in Norway before we brought him in and that did not really work out.
I am all for bringing in potential but when we talk upwards of 50mil that is just crazy. Surely Dembele from Lyon is a better option as the league is a decent standard and he was good in the second tier in England and did well for Celtic and would be cheaper if reports are to be believed.
 
If we do bring him to the club then all well and good but a player that has scored a lot of goals in the Norwegian and Swiss leagues hardly gets my pulse racing and I think Mame Diouf was prolific in Norway before we brought him in and that did not really work out.
I am all for bringing in potential but when we talk upwards of 50mil that is just crazy. Surely Dembele from Lyon is a better option as the league is a decent standard and he was good in the second tier in England and did well for Celtic and would be cheaper if reports are to be believed.

What an absolute trainwreck of a post. Swiss league....

This thread is a good indicator of whose opinions can be ignored. How anyone would say no to a talent like that is beyond me when we are one injury away from not scoring goals again.
 
Do you not remember when Martial was injured? Greenwood is good but not ready for that kind of responsibility yet. And when we change Martial, the game dies.

We need another striker, whether it's Haaland or not. There's enough gametime to go around.
A midfield actually nullifies all the issues we had with Martial being out because with proper creativity in midfield even Rashford would be able to play as a CF again and Greenwood would also have an easier task there.

Right now Martial role is elevated because he tends to drop deep in midfield thus helping our inept midfield creativity(Lingard and Perreira guilty of this) thus his role becoming even more essential because he's now tasked with making things happen for other forwards/attacking players.

But once you have a good and creative midfield we can play any type of striker there, not only one that can hold up play and drop deep to help create. Therfore Rashford becomes an option again as CF and Greenwood can also be trusted in there despite his young age.

Honestly, wanting a new striker shouldn't even be a topic when we technically have 3 strikers in the squad in Martial, Greenwood and Rashford. These talks have crept in only because our lack of creativity which led to lack of goals sometimes make it seems we don't have goalscorers which isn't actually the case. Creativity is what doing us in.
 
The reason I want Haaland here is because we have one left footed attacker in the whole squad & we desperately need another one. Nearly everyone bar Greenwood is right footed.
 
A midfield actually nullifies all the issues we had with Martial being out because with proper creativity in midfield even Rashford would be able to play as a CF again and Greenwood would also have an easier task there.

Right now Martial role is elevated because he tends to drop deep in midfield thus helping our inept midfield creativity(Lingard and Perreira guilty of this) thus his role becoming even more essential because he's now tasked with making things happen for other forwards/attacking players.

But once you have a good and creative midfield we can play any type of striker there, not only one that can hold up play and drop deep to help create. Therfore Rashford becomes an option again as CF and Greenwood can also be trusted in there despite his young age.

Honestly, wanting a new striker shouldn't even be a topic when we technically have 3 strikers in the squad in Martial, Greenwood and Rashford. These talks have crept in only because our lack of creativity which led to lack of goals sometimes make it seems we don't have goalscorers which isn't actually the case. Creativity is what doing us in.
Buying another striker ahead of a midfielders/RW will be so typical of Man Utd that I half expect it will happen.
 
Buying another striker ahead of a midfielders/RW will be so typical of Man Utd that I half expect it will happen.

Who to say that our targeted midfielders are available in this window? Based on your logic we should ignore and give up on other players simply because we HAVE to wait until the priority CM / RW are bought in?

And can you remind me when the last time we bought a striker and still play for us?
 
we had Pereira, Mata, Lingard yesterday playing against Newcastle and few think we shouldn't sign CF (who is available for around 20 million).
 
A midfield actually nullifies all the issues we had with Martial being out because with proper creativity in midfield even Rashford would be able to play as a CF again and Greenwood would also have an easier task there.

Right now Martial role is elevated because he tends to drop deep in midfield thus helping our inept midfield creativity(Lingard and Perreira guilty of this) thus his role becoming even more essential because he's now tasked with making things happen for other forwards/attacking players.

But once you have a good and creative midfield we can play any type of striker there, not only one that can hold up play and drop deep to help create. Therfore Rashford becomes an option again as CF and Greenwood can also be trusted in there despite his young age.

Honestly, wanting a new striker shouldn't even be a topic when we technically have 3 strikers in the squad in Martial, Greenwood and Rashford. These talks have crept in only because our lack of creativity which led to lack of goals sometimes make it seems we don't have goalscorers which isn't actually the case. Creativity is what doing us in.

I agree that midfield is our priority. The type of midfielder we need is not available in Jan, unless we throw silly money at Bruno (who seems like a great player, but the fact that he had no real interest from any teams in the summer should have alarm bells ringing).

I disagree that Rashford could do it, even with proper service. He just doesn't have the positioning, runs and consistent first touch to be a deadly CF. He's doing wonders out wide and has finally made that position his. No reason to move him.

At the rumoured release clause, Haaland is a no brain buy. Despite CF not being a priority, we will require additions there at some point soon and we'd be silly not to get him at such a low price whilst he's available.

I honestly think it'll be Haaland or nothing in Jan.
 
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