Know the opposition : Citizens del Bellend were founded in 2007 after a bunch of edgy teenagers that stole NikNaks from a nearby shop went on to play 5-a-side which was interrupted by Interpol due to violation of NikNaks rights. The incident inspired the previous owner, Thaksin Tsubasa Something Something to form a football club for the fathers of those teenagers to cheer them up while their kids were in jail by watching Brazilian footwork of Robinho. A few years later Thaksin sold his soul, including the club to Mansour Whatshisname from UAE. It was reported that Thaksin ran up to Mansour while he was buying petrol in containers and got an offer he couldnt refuse involving doubling the size of containers which he used to store the petrol.
From that point on, Citizens del Bellend became one of the most dangerous clubs in the world for its ability to turn petrol into money at any time they like, in order to purchase whatever they need. During this period, they managed to buy several world class players like Gabriel Jesus who is not holy at all and Vincent Widehead Kompany who is now turned into a statue despite being alive, well and middle aged.