Next time you do an experiment I am going to stalk your pages like an owl or a cheetah or something
Gaming The RedCafe NBA Simulation 30/31 | Season Review | NBA Final | BasketballGM
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Next time you do an experiment I am going to stalk your pages like an owl or a cheetah or something
3rd best player in the world 
I really love the Texas rivalry, with Houston on top of the power rankings. Too bad for Houston we are a team built for playoffs with our great defense. I kinda feel we are a bit like the Lebron-Wade-Bosh Heat team with nobbers our Lebron and we all have to sacrifice to play winning basketball.
nobbers going on visits to his pa and asking if he would like to see how a ring looks…
I really love the Texas rivalry, with Houston on top of the power rankings. Too bad for Houston we are a team built for playoffs with our great defense. I kinda feel we are a bit like the Lebron-Wade-Bosh Heat team with nobbers our Lebron and we all have to sacrifice to play winning basketball.
nobbers going on visits to his pa and asking if he would like to see how a ring looks…
3rd best player in the world
I really love the Texas rivalry, with Houston on top of the power rankings. Too bad for Houston we are a team built for playoffs with our great defense. I kinda feel we are a bit like the Lebron-Wade-Bosh Heat team with nobbers our Lebron and we all have to sacrifice to play winning basketball.
nobbers going on visits to his pa and asking if he would like to see how a ring looks…
altodevil is doing the same to his son, but then he in turn asks whether the old man would like to see what the MVP trophy looks like.
Some call him Alto, we call him Gramps. He failed to teach his son winning basketball, so we are his familiy now
Alto benched? Good news.
What an underwhelming move
18/19 Season Preview Part 2
18/19 Season Preview Part 2
@Skizzo @The Cat @BenitoSTARR @Dr. Dwayne @P-Nut @hobbers @V.O. @weetee @Dan
Skizzlet - Atlanta Hawks (29-53)
Skizzlet isn't one of those immediate superstars we've seen earlier, but he's steadily getting there. He's a grower, not a shower. Being on a team full of Centers and Forwards might get in the way of his playing time, but even so he'll no doubt be given plenty of chances to show what he's about. The Hawks aren't the best team, but they've got a fair amount of depth. Playoffs, maybe?
The Cub - Brooklyn Nets (36-46)
The Cub could have won a couple of titles so far, if he had been luckier (or smarter) with his team choice. The Brooklyn Nets aren't going to be particularly good this season, I suspect. The silver lining is that there are two other young and already pretty good players on the team. With a bit of luck they could make the playoffs this season already, but with even more luck they could be a good team already next season.
Dr. Junior & BenitoSTARR - Cleveland Cavaliers (52-30, 2nd Round)
The physicality of BenitoSTARR has taken a dive. He's still got very solid skills, but it remains to be seen whether his career playing style is possible for a 37-year old hammer. He's had a fantastic career, so anything he can add to the Cavs is a bonus at this point. Either way Dr. Junior is going to be the main man in Cleveland. They should aim for the playoffs, certainly considering they were the 3-seed last season, but there are no guarantees. Even in the East.
BenitwoSTARRLET & P-Nut - Denver Nuggets (41-41)
The Nuggets were quite unlucky to miss out on the playoffs last season, finishing with a completely even 41-41 record. While they've started this one poorly, the first week isn't a great indicator of bad teams (though it often is of really good teams; more on that later). There's no reason why Denver shouldn't be even better than last year. P-Nut has the same overall rating, but his technical skills all improved. He got a bit slower, but he should still be able to put up some great performances. The only thing holding him and BenitwoSTARRLET back might be that they're both incredible shooters. They can't both take all the shots.
weeweetee, Lil' V.O. & hobbers - Houston Rockets (68-14, Conference Finals)
Okay, so the Rockets didn't win the NBA last season. They did get back to the Conference Finals, though. And while they've got a fantastic team to contend with (the Spurs), every year makes it more likely that altodevil's defence is no longer so important. The only thing the Houston gang can do is keep improving. Well, hobbers won't improve at this point, but at 40 he's still a 62 overall rating player, a good starter on almost all teams. weeweetee and Lil' V.O. both got a bit better, though. And when your rating is in the mid 80s, any improvement (or decline) matters a lot more than lower down the scale.
Dan II - Los Angeles Lakers (43-39, 1st Round)
A couple of seasons ago Dan II was allowed to play 4 minutes on average, in under half of the Lakers' games, scoring 4 points per game. This season I wouldn't be surprised if he scores 25+. The challenge is that there are two other Point Guards who are technically better than him, though in reality I suspect he's the best player on the team. If he keeps getting a little bit better, he might average 30 next season. Or 35.
@Skizzo @The Cat @BenitoSTARR @Dr. Dwayne @P-Nut @hobbers @V.O. @weetee @Dan
Skizzlet - Atlanta Hawks (29-53)
Skizzlet isn't one of those immediate superstars we've seen earlier, but he's steadily getting there. He's a grower, not a shower. Being on a team full of Centers and Forwards might get in the way of his playing time, but even so he'll no doubt be given plenty of chances to show what he's about. The Hawks aren't the best team, but they've got a fair amount of depth. Playoffs, maybe?
The Cub - Brooklyn Nets (36-46)
The Cub could have won a couple of titles so far, if he had been luckier (or smarter) with his team choice. The Brooklyn Nets aren't going to be particularly good this season, I suspect. The silver lining is that there are two other young and already pretty good players on the team. With a bit of luck they could make the playoffs this season already, but with even more luck they could be a good team already next season.
Dr. Junior & BenitoSTARR - Cleveland Cavaliers (52-30, 2nd Round)
The physicality of BenitoSTARR has taken a dive. He's still got very solid skills, but it remains to be seen whether his career playing style is possible for a 37-year old hammer. He's had a fantastic career, so anything he can add to the Cavs is a bonus at this point. Either way Dr. Junior is going to be the main man in Cleveland. They should aim for the playoffs, certainly considering they were the 3-seed last season, but there are no guarantees. Even in the East.
BenitwoSTARRLET & P-Nut - Denver Nuggets (41-41)
The Nuggets were quite unlucky to miss out on the playoffs last season, finishing with a completely even 41-41 record. While they've started this one poorly, the first week isn't a great indicator of bad teams (though it often is of really good teams; more on that later). There's no reason why Denver shouldn't be even better than last year. P-Nut has the same overall rating, but his technical skills all improved. He got a bit slower, but he should still be able to put up some great performances. The only thing holding him and BenitwoSTARRLET back might be that they're both incredible shooters. They can't both take all the shots.
weeweetee, Lil' V.O. & hobbers - Houston Rockets (68-14, Conference Finals)
Okay, so the Rockets didn't win the NBA last season. They did get back to the Conference Finals, though. And while they've got a fantastic team to contend with (the Spurs), every year makes it more likely that altodevil's defence is no longer so important. The only thing the Houston gang can do is keep improving. Well, hobbers won't improve at this point, but at 40 he's still a 62 overall rating player, a good starter on almost all teams. weeweetee and Lil' V.O. both got a bit better, though. And when your rating is in the mid 80s, any improvement (or decline) matters a lot more than lower down the scale.
Dan II - Los Angeles Lakers (43-39, 1st Round)
A couple of seasons ago Dan II was allowed to play 4 minutes on average, in under half of the Lakers' games, scoring 4 points per game. This season I wouldn't be surprised if he scores 25+. The challenge is that there are two other Point Guards who are technically better than him, though in reality I suspect he's the best player on the team. If he keeps getting a little bit better, he might average 30 next season. Or 35.
They were right, 40 year old Namekians cant jump.
Is kemba the last laker standing from the dynasty?
Yep, though he joined the year after your last ring.
18/19 Season Preview Part 3
18/19 Season Preview Part 3
@altodevil @sebsheep @reelworld @Salt Bailly @Solius @Stobzilla @oneniltothearsenal @hobbers @Heine
Given I'm showing the whole 55+ rating squad, some of you are on pretty shallow teams.
sontodevil - Memphis Grizzlies (46-36, 1st Round)
Coming off his 1st MVP award and his 3rd DPOY award, sontodevil has something to prove this season. Is he really the best player in the league? If he is, he's got to try to get past the 1st Round of the playoffs. That's going to be easier said than done, given that the West is very, very strong - particularly at the top. Still, the Grizzlies have a very strong 6-man rotation, even if it gets rather weak beyond that. The first goal has to be to avoid the 6-8 seeds for once.
SebJr - Miami Heat (36-46)
SebJr is actually not on one of those shallow teams I mentioned at the top. In fact, it's rather the opposite. Granted, a lot of that depth isn't of the very highest quality, but a decent player is better than a bad player. I double-checked that with Michael Owen, and he agreed. Now, does it matter that 6 of the 10 best players on the team are Point Guards, including the top 3? Why yes. Yes it does. All I know is that if SebJr wants to secure that Hall of Fame spot that eluded his father, he's going to have to have a good final third of his career.
reelworld II - Milwaukee Bucks (39-43, 1st Round)
And now for something completely different. Where the Heat were the opposite of a good example of shallow depth, the Bucks are the opposite of that again. It honestly doesn't help that the entire squad is 11 players, where 2 of those are damn near unplayable and one, Michael Porter, is literally unplayable - for the next 80+ games probably. reelworld II is still realistically a top 10 player, but he needs to prove it by dragging the Bucks to the playoffs. Again.
Pepper Bailly - Minnesota Timberwolves (40-42)
The only reason the Timberwolves don't have as bad depth as the Bucks is that Wendell Carter Jr. went from 42 (unplayable) to 56 (pretty good) over the off season. With the continued improvements to Pepper Bailly, and Michael Kidd-Gilchrist to take off some of the load, Minnesota actually have a rather good starting 5. If they don't make the playoffs it'll be solely due to the fact that every player below Carter is 50 or below. There's still time for trades, so maybe something can be done?
Solius - New Orleans Pelicans (17-65)
At what point will this 39 year old man stop scoring 20+ points per game? It doesn't look like it's this season. Last season he ended at precisely 20.0, but the addition of Luka Doncic might just make it easier for him to score. It's not like there's any pressure to make the playoffs or anything. Not being last is probably a good enough goal. He's got his MVP award, his rings, his All NBA Teams, all defensive, All Star appearances all star MVP, etc, etc. At this point it's all gravy, which I'm nearly positive is some kind of expression.
Two Nil & Stobzilla II - New York Knicks (36-46)
Are the Knicks good again? They've flattered to deceive before, but I think this might be the season they return to the playoffs. The last time was in 2014, when BenitoSTARR was the best player on the team. Since then Stobzilla II has gotten even better, despite only getting older (one year at a time). They've also added Two Nil since then, and he's turning into quite the player. He was already a triple double machine last season, and I suspect I won't even bother screenshotting his statistical feats this season. I don't think they're winning any rings this season, but we've seen upsets in the Final before. Let's get to the playoffs before worrying about that, though.
Nobbers, Heine, Sonius & altodevil (61-21, NBA Champions)
It's the champions! They're actually one of those shallow teams I mentioned, though how much does that actually matter when their entire starting 5 is 66 or higher rating? There are teams without a single player at 66 - and surprisingly many of them are in the West. The youngsters all got better too, though Sonius had one of those in-between off-seasons. Nobbers solidified himself as the best player in the league, while Heine took a leap up the rankings. Honestly, you can't not have these guys as the prohibitive favourites to repeat their championship run. Whether or not it happens might actually hinge on altodevil's contributions. I think the Spurs can thank their lucky stars that altodevil has aged that gracefully. That said, at some point that physical decline is going to impact his usefulness in the playoffs. If it isn't this season, they're winning again. If they can avoid injuries.
@altodevil @sebsheep @reelworld @Salt Bailly @Solius @Stobzilla @oneniltothearsenal @hobbers @Heine
Given I'm showing the whole 55+ rating squad, some of you are on pretty shallow teams.
sontodevil - Memphis Grizzlies (46-36, 1st Round)
Coming off his 1st MVP award and his 3rd DPOY award, sontodevil has something to prove this season. Is he really the best player in the league? If he is, he's got to try to get past the 1st Round of the playoffs. That's going to be easier said than done, given that the West is very, very strong - particularly at the top. Still, the Grizzlies have a very strong 6-man rotation, even if it gets rather weak beyond that. The first goal has to be to avoid the 6-8 seeds for once.
SebJr - Miami Heat (36-46)
SebJr is actually not on one of those shallow teams I mentioned at the top. In fact, it's rather the opposite. Granted, a lot of that depth isn't of the very highest quality, but a decent player is better than a bad player. I double-checked that with Michael Owen, and he agreed. Now, does it matter that 6 of the 10 best players on the team are Point Guards, including the top 3? Why yes. Yes it does. All I know is that if SebJr wants to secure that Hall of Fame spot that eluded his father, he's going to have to have a good final third of his career.
reelworld II - Milwaukee Bucks (39-43, 1st Round)
And now for something completely different. Where the Heat were the opposite of a good example of shallow depth, the Bucks are the opposite of that again. It honestly doesn't help that the entire squad is 11 players, where 2 of those are damn near unplayable and one, Michael Porter, is literally unplayable - for the next 80+ games probably. reelworld II is still realistically a top 10 player, but he needs to prove it by dragging the Bucks to the playoffs. Again.
Pepper Bailly - Minnesota Timberwolves (40-42)
The only reason the Timberwolves don't have as bad depth as the Bucks is that Wendell Carter Jr. went from 42 (unplayable) to 56 (pretty good) over the off season. With the continued improvements to Pepper Bailly, and Michael Kidd-Gilchrist to take off some of the load, Minnesota actually have a rather good starting 5. If they don't make the playoffs it'll be solely due to the fact that every player below Carter is 50 or below. There's still time for trades, so maybe something can be done?
Solius - New Orleans Pelicans (17-65)
At what point will this 39 year old man stop scoring 20+ points per game? It doesn't look like it's this season. Last season he ended at precisely 20.0, but the addition of Luka Doncic might just make it easier for him to score. It's not like there's any pressure to make the playoffs or anything. Not being last is probably a good enough goal. He's got his MVP award, his rings, his All NBA Teams, all defensive, All Star appearances all star MVP, etc, etc. At this point it's all gravy, which I'm nearly positive is some kind of expression.
Two Nil & Stobzilla II - New York Knicks (36-46)
Are the Knicks good again? They've flattered to deceive before, but I think this might be the season they return to the playoffs. The last time was in 2014, when BenitoSTARR was the best player on the team. Since then Stobzilla II has gotten even better, despite only getting older (one year at a time). They've also added Two Nil since then, and he's turning into quite the player. He was already a triple double machine last season, and I suspect I won't even bother screenshotting his statistical feats this season. I don't think they're winning any rings this season, but we've seen upsets in the Final before. Let's get to the playoffs before worrying about that, though.
Nobbers, Heine, Sonius & altodevil (61-21, NBA Champions)
It's the champions! They're actually one of those shallow teams I mentioned, though how much does that actually matter when their entire starting 5 is 66 or higher rating? There are teams without a single player at 66 - and surprisingly many of them are in the West. The youngsters all got better too, though Sonius had one of those in-between off-seasons. Nobbers solidified himself as the best player in the league, while Heine took a leap up the rankings. Honestly, you can't not have these guys as the prohibitive favourites to repeat their championship run. Whether or not it happens might actually hinge on altodevil's contributions. I think the Spurs can thank their lucky stars that altodevil has aged that gracefully. That said, at some point that physical decline is going to impact his usefulness in the playoffs. If it isn't this season, they're winning again. If they can avoid injuries.
I hope I break 40.
Where’s my fecking bump nimic
Trust me it's there
Also I can't supersize you just like that, one year, you'll die like that guy who made the film.
fecking hell, serves me right for signing that contract
Still usable. Have a funny feeling I'll retire at this season's end given contract is up. But I'd love to rot on the bench and pick up rings.
18/19 30-Game Update
18/19 30-Game Update
@BenitoSTARR @Dan @Dr. Dwayne @P-Nut @Salt Bailly @Skizzo @Solius @Stobzilla @The Cat @V.O. @altodevil @hobbers @oneniltothearsenal @reelworld @sebsheep @weetee @Heine
Trades
hobbers (Rockets > Warriors), weeweetee & Lil' V.O. (Rockets) - this is a clear case of age discrimination. Ultimately this does make the Rockets slightly worse, probably, but it also means they have a PG who is 14 years younger than hobbers.
Dan II (Lakers > 76ers) - not a bad move for Dan II, on the face of it
Dan II (76ers), hobbers (Warriors)
sontodevil (Grizzlies) - say what you will about the Grizzlies, but at least they're going for it.
reelworld II (Bucks) - Yeah okay I guess?
Pepper Bailly (Timberwolves) - seems like a position trade
Solius (Pelicans) - ¯\_(ツ)_/¯
Standings
Stats
Finally, a look at the new teams of hobbers and Dan II
@BenitoSTARR @Dan @Dr. Dwayne @P-Nut @Salt Bailly @Skizzo @Solius @Stobzilla @The Cat @V.O. @altodevil @hobbers @oneniltothearsenal @reelworld @sebsheep @weetee @Heine
Trades
hobbers (Rockets > Warriors), weeweetee & Lil' V.O. (Rockets) - this is a clear case of age discrimination. Ultimately this does make the Rockets slightly worse, probably, but it also means they have a PG who is 14 years younger than hobbers.
Dan II (Lakers > 76ers) - not a bad move for Dan II, on the face of it
Dan II (76ers), hobbers (Warriors)
sontodevil (Grizzlies) - say what you will about the Grizzlies, but at least they're going for it.
reelworld II (Bucks) - Yeah okay I guess?
Pepper Bailly (Timberwolves) - seems like a position trade
Solius (Pelicans) - ¯\_(ツ)_/¯
Standings
Stats
Finally, a look at the new teams of hobbers and Dan II
That sontodevil statline is a big one no?
It's his highest GameScore yet.
Poor Cub
Poor Cub
He's simultaneously having a much better and much worse career than his dad.
Playing the long game. All is well.
Feels like my team do nothing with drafts and trades each year, then weirdly get worse...
New game rule
Every player gets one broken contract. You can only use it at the end of a season, and you'll be up for free agency. Rookie contracts don't apply.
For the lulz.
Every player gets one broken contract. You can only use it at the end of a season, and you'll be up for free agency. Rookie contracts don't apply.
For the lulz.
@nimic am I eligible for a son now?
Yep.
Feels weird and dystopian that we need @nimic's permission to procreate.
Does anyone want to try teaming up with sontodevil?
I'm tempted, Grizzlies have an average team but a horrendous ownership
Yeah, if I'm missing the playoffs this season, sayonara Bucks.
btw, @nimic, did anyone here ever got 50-40-90 season ?
I’d like to see where I go from the Pelicans. Unless my contract there is nearly up?
Done, let's see if we can do something more balanced
You've got one more year on it (after this).
Only @Dan II! He shot (FG/3P/FT) 54%/48%/94% in 2017 (on low minutes played)
If we round up, then also weeweetee in 2018, since he shot 49.9%/43%/91%.
Lil' V.O. has 5 out of the top 6 field goal shooting seasons, if you include the current one. But he doesn't really shoot threes.
Oh yeah, and BenitoSTARR had a very stupid 56%/48%/47% in 2000. Meaning his worst shot was the free throw.
Alright tear up my Pelicans contract and let’s see if I end up riding some coattails.
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Sometimes being special isn’t a good thing
The Cub would like to roll the dice again please at the end of the season.