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TLDR: I’m the best
Gaming The RedCafe NBA Simulation 30/31 | Draft and Free Agency | People are starting to retire - the age of Caf is coming to an end | BasketballGM
- Thread starter nimic
- Start date
This is by far the most insane stat out of them all. Dennis Rodman was 17% for his career, which is the highest all-time. 23% is a cheat code.
@nimic, no idea about the salary cap but would you assume ai broke up our super team from seattle when we were on top of our game because of financial issues or because they thought they could build an even stronger team (historically bad decision then, probably worse than Hobbers loving it in Charlotte).
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If you‘d work on your turnovers you might win a title again I‘d say.
It's definitely possible they were hoping to spend a bit less money. They could probably have kept going with the three of you and still won some stuff, if they were smart.
Kiss my rings.
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Ok but will you clean them this time because it was like the Bruce Bogtrotter scene from Matilda last time.
Get to Minnesota we'd win every year.
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My boss works in New York mainly when he’s on earth. He’s started hanging around with a bunch of dudes and a Scottish widow or something?
So I’m pretty much contractually obliged to appear in a whole bunch of spin off and sequel movies.
Yeah, might be time to call it a day of this guy. We can make kids right?
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@nimic now there’s a proposition.
Willing to do what's needed.
Entering the draft with 100 in every stat.
Am I the only one to play in LA?
Space Jam would have been such a banger starring a charismatic hammer instead of MJ!
Samid spent a season on the Lakers I think.
Yeah, you basically make sebsheep Jr or sebsheep II.
2007 Draft and Free Agency
2007 Draft and Free Agency (and free agency window trades)
Draft:
@Stobzilla has left the Memphis Grizzlies and signed with the San Antonio Spurs for $9.65M/yr through 2011
@Skizzo has re-signed with the Orlando Magic for $6.55M/yr through 2012
@reelworld has left the Phoenix Suns and signed for the Orlando Magic for $8.76M/yr through 2012. Yes, that means the Magic now have three Cafites in the same position (PG), but I wouldn't be too worried for... reasons.
@BenitoSTARR has predictably chosen to sign a new contract with the New York Knicks for $18.55M/yr through 2012
Trades:
First a few straightforward ones.
@Stobzilla @sebsheep - Not sure what to make of this one one way or the other.
@Salt Bailly @sebsheep - This seems like a bad trade for Detroit. I guess that New Orleans pick might be good.
Hold on to your hats
@Solius @Skizzo - Remember how Chicago just won the league? This is Orlando casually just giving them a good player and a potentially good player for a single pick. And then...
They trade the pick, another pick, Skizzo and another decent player for a slightly younger version of Skizzo
This must have convinced the Seattle Supersonics that they are absolute geniuses, because they immediately do this move. That's a single 59 rating player for two 62 rating players, a 59 rating player, a 57 rating player and a 56 rating player. Admittedly they are all older and more expensive. But don't worry, we're not done yet.
Miami immediately trade Malik Allen (plus two players and two picks) back to Seattle for @oneniltothearsenal. One of those other players is Amar'e Stoudemire, who only 2 years ago was part of a huge package to get oneniltothearsenal from Miami in the first place.
To summarize: Skizzo is now in Seattle and oneniltothearsenal is now in Miami.
Oh, and then Miami immediately trade Mike Dunleavy to @Dr. Dwayne's Pacers.
Draft:
- Kevin Durant (GF 62/81) to Washington Wizards
- Thaddeus Young (PF (53/68) to Memphis Grizzlies
- Greg Oden (C 47/71) to New Jersey Nets
- Yi Jianlian (PF 49/69) to Boston Celtics
- Corey Brewer (GF 52/67) to Memphis Grizzlies
- Joakim Noah (C 55/66) to Philadelphia 76ers
- Spencer Hawes (FC 40/70) to Houston Rockets
- Javaris Crittenton (G 44/65) to New Jersey Nets
- Julian Wright (SF 48/66) to Milwaukee Bucks
- Rodney Stuckey (G 51/64) to Toronto Raptors
@Stobzilla has left the Memphis Grizzlies and signed with the San Antonio Spurs for $9.65M/yr through 2011
@Skizzo has re-signed with the Orlando Magic for $6.55M/yr through 2012
@reelworld has left the Phoenix Suns and signed for the Orlando Magic for $8.76M/yr through 2012. Yes, that means the Magic now have three Cafites in the same position (PG), but I wouldn't be too worried for... reasons.
@BenitoSTARR has predictably chosen to sign a new contract with the New York Knicks for $18.55M/yr through 2012
Trades:
First a few straightforward ones.
@Stobzilla @sebsheep - Not sure what to make of this one one way or the other.
@Salt Bailly @sebsheep - This seems like a bad trade for Detroit. I guess that New Orleans pick might be good.
Hold on to your hats
@Solius @Skizzo - Remember how Chicago just won the league? This is Orlando casually just giving them a good player and a potentially good player for a single pick. And then...
They trade the pick, another pick, Skizzo and another decent player for a slightly younger version of Skizzo
This must have convinced the Seattle Supersonics that they are absolute geniuses, because they immediately do this move. That's a single 59 rating player for two 62 rating players, a 59 rating player, a 57 rating player and a 56 rating player. Admittedly they are all older and more expensive. But don't worry, we're not done yet.
Miami immediately trade Malik Allen (plus two players and two picks) back to Seattle for @oneniltothearsenal. One of those other players is Amar'e Stoudemire, who only 2 years ago was part of a huge package to get oneniltothearsenal from Miami in the first place.
To summarize: Skizzo is now in Seattle and oneniltothearsenal is now in Miami.
Oh, and then Miami immediately trade Mike Dunleavy to @Dr. Dwayne's Pacers.
For the record.
Seattle Supersonics starting 5:
Miami Heat entire team:
Seattle Supersonics starting 5:
Miami Heat entire team:
Seattle in shambles. There would be riots in real life.
All happening elsewhere and I'm just losing my buddy.
Bosh in
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fecking hellFor the record.
Seattle Supersonics starting 5:
Miami Heat entire team:
Is Riley already the GM there? That definitely look like his movesI'm cursed!
Season Preview coming up later today, and it's interesting how no one is really declining too much, despite you guys getting into your late 20s and even 30s now. There's probably more red than green, but not by that much. We've still got the 4 best players in the league, and more in the top 40-50. I expect the small declines to continue, though ironically that might make you more likely to win stuff. The better you are, the more expensive you are, and the less the AI manages to build around you. If it even tries (FAO: hobbers).
Reminder that you have to be below 60 rating to ask for early retirement. You shouldn't be asking for it before then anyway, as even at 60 you can be a starter for a great team.
Edit: I'll let the game run a week into the season before I take screenshots of the teams, as that sorts out player order better. As a consequence there might be a couple of trades, and one of you might even switch teams.
Reminder that you have to be below 60 rating to ask for early retirement. You shouldn't be asking for it before then anyway, as even at 60 you can be a starter for a great team.
Edit: I'll let the game run a week into the season before I take screenshots of the teams, as that sorts out player order better. As a consequence there might be a couple of trades, and one of you might even switch teams.
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07/08 Season Preview (Part 1)
07/08 Season Preview Part 1
(@BenitoSTARR @Dan @Dr. Dwayne @P-Nut @Salt Bailly @Samid @Skizzo @Solius @Stobzilla @The Cat @V.O. @altodevil @hobbers @oneniltothearsenal @reelworld @sebsheep @weetee)
Conferences are probably coming tomorrow.
Let's start with this. Is this a new Cafite holy trinity? The last one won a couple of rings. What can this one do?
Power Rankings (the numbers are off because some players are injured, and the numbers reflect that exact moment in time).
A lot of Cafites in the East, and coincidentally the East seems significantly stronger than the West (though the West has the alto-Lakers). The East actually has fully 12 out of the Top 15 teams. We might see a lot of good Cafites on good teams miss the playoffs.
Team Finances and Strategy
Predictions (eagle-eyed readers will notice this gives away some rating developments)
(@BenitoSTARR @Dan @Dr. Dwayne @P-Nut @Salt Bailly @Samid @Skizzo @Solius @Stobzilla @The Cat @V.O. @altodevil @hobbers @oneniltothearsenal @reelworld @sebsheep @weetee)
Conferences are probably coming tomorrow.
Let's start with this. Is this a new Cafite holy trinity? The last one won a couple of rings. What can this one do?
Power Rankings (the numbers are off because some players are injured, and the numbers reflect that exact moment in time).
A lot of Cafites in the East, and coincidentally the East seems significantly stronger than the West (though the West has the alto-Lakers). The East actually has fully 12 out of the Top 15 teams. We might see a lot of good Cafites on good teams miss the playoffs.
Team Finances and Strategy
Predictions (eagle-eyed readers will notice this gives away some rating developments)
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Welcome to New York @sebsheep
Hmmm hopefully this doesn't mess with my playoff plans
I’m carrying this team.
hobbers and I need to team up when our contracts expire. Go somewhere with a ton of cap room.
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You carry me into training so you’re technically correct.
Still improving while stuck in Charlotte shithole.
2 more seasons.
2 more seasons.
It‘ll be that more epic if you eventually win the title with the Bobcats. Commissioner @nimic will probably rig it that way anyway.Still improving while stuck in Charlotte shithole.
2 more seasons.
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I think it would be more interesting to see him unfulfilled and see if his offspring can atone for the sins of the father.
Season 2: The Hoblet of Fire
07/08 Season Preview (Part 2)
07/08 Season Preview Part 2 - West
@altodevil on the Los Angeles Lakers (61-21, Conference Finals)
altodevil didn't change much since last season, but his Lakers got quite a bit better. This is certainly a good enough to squad to win the title, though he will have some very strong teams in the East to contend with (if he can get past The Cat's Minnesota Timberwolves this time).
@The Cat on the Minnesota Timberwolves (51-31, Runner-up)
Speaking of The Cat and the Minnesota Timberwolves... they're still here! They're still not an incredible team, but they weren't when they won the championship or when they got to the NBA Finals either. They have a borderline superstar in Monta Ellis now, and a lot of quite good players. Is it another finals run? The West isn't very strong, but they will have to beat an even stronger Lakers again to do it.
@P-Nut on the Memphis Grizzlies (42-40, 1st Round)
P-Nut is the second youngest Cafite, so he's still getting better and better. The Grizzlies definitely have the chance to get further than the 1st round in the playoffs, but it's hard to say how good they really are. Ideally those mid-high 50s would be low 60s instead. Right now it might just be a bit too much on P-Nut to make anything happen.
@Salt Bailly on the Denver Nuggets (48-34, 2nd Round)
It's no longer quite the same Denver Nuggets that Salt Bailly led to the 2nd round of the playoffs last season. There are clear signs that they are more interested in building for the future than actually winning right now.
@Stobzilla II on the San Antonio Spurs (33-49)
Stobzilla II is improving, as one would expect of a this young Cafite. Luckily (?) he's also on a team with a weak enough starting 5 that he is easily going to get lots of minutes. The Spurs haven't been good since hobbers left, and even in a weak West there's no way a starting 5 exclusively consisting of 50s is going to make the playoffs. Stobzilla II has a lot of time, though.
@Skizzo on the Seattle Supersonics (37-45, 1st Round)
Skizzo had a difficult summer, taking a small step back in every attribute. He's still a pretty good player, and certainly not too old to get even better. It's a bit worrying that at 61 rating he's the best player on the Supersonics, though. I guess that's what happens when you replace literally your entire squad in one season. I don't think it's necessary to point out that Seattle aren't playing to win this season. Skizzo has a long enough contract that he might just be there to see them slowly get good again, like they did when the Solius, The Cat and weetee took them to two championships.
East coming later today.
@altodevil on the Los Angeles Lakers (61-21, Conference Finals)
altodevil didn't change much since last season, but his Lakers got quite a bit better. This is certainly a good enough to squad to win the title, though he will have some very strong teams in the East to contend with (if he can get past The Cat's Minnesota Timberwolves this time).
@The Cat on the Minnesota Timberwolves (51-31, Runner-up)
Speaking of The Cat and the Minnesota Timberwolves... they're still here! They're still not an incredible team, but they weren't when they won the championship or when they got to the NBA Finals either. They have a borderline superstar in Monta Ellis now, and a lot of quite good players. Is it another finals run? The West isn't very strong, but they will have to beat an even stronger Lakers again to do it.
@P-Nut on the Memphis Grizzlies (42-40, 1st Round)
P-Nut is the second youngest Cafite, so he's still getting better and better. The Grizzlies definitely have the chance to get further than the 1st round in the playoffs, but it's hard to say how good they really are. Ideally those mid-high 50s would be low 60s instead. Right now it might just be a bit too much on P-Nut to make anything happen.
@Salt Bailly on the Denver Nuggets (48-34, 2nd Round)
It's no longer quite the same Denver Nuggets that Salt Bailly led to the 2nd round of the playoffs last season. There are clear signs that they are more interested in building for the future than actually winning right now.
@Stobzilla II on the San Antonio Spurs (33-49)
Stobzilla II is improving, as one would expect of a this young Cafite. Luckily (?) he's also on a team with a weak enough starting 5 that he is easily going to get lots of minutes. The Spurs haven't been good since hobbers left, and even in a weak West there's no way a starting 5 exclusively consisting of 50s is going to make the playoffs. Stobzilla II has a lot of time, though.
@Skizzo on the Seattle Supersonics (37-45, 1st Round)
Skizzo had a difficult summer, taking a small step back in every attribute. He's still a pretty good player, and certainly not too old to get even better. It's a bit worrying that at 61 rating he's the best player on the Supersonics, though. I guess that's what happens when you replace literally your entire squad in one season. I don't think it's necessary to point out that Seattle aren't playing to win this season. Skizzo has a long enough contract that he might just be there to see them slowly get good again, like they did when the Solius, The Cat and weetee took them to two championships.
East coming later today.
What a fall from grace for Seattle. Totally botched dynasty.
07/08 Season Preview (Part 3)
07/08 Season Preview Part 3 - East
@BenitoSTARR, @Dan & @sebsheep on the New York Knicks (54-28, Conference Final)
How will the new Cafite trio manage? Expectations are high, but they may have to be tempered with the knowledge that the Knicks leadership apparently considers their team to be "rebuilding" this season. On the face of it there don't seem to be too many reasons why they would do any worse than last season, so what gives? We'll have to wait and see if the strategy has any tangible consequences.
@hobbers and the (good???) Charlotte Bobcats (42-40, 1st Round)
hobbers has been very, very slowly declining the last couple of years, but 1) that only took him to "still best player in the world", and 2) he seems to be trying to reverse it. Surprisingly the rest of the Charlotte Bobcats seem to have gone along for the ride. There are no huge changes (except maybe the signing of the pretty good Sebastian Telfair), but somehow the team just seems... better. It's possible for an 89 rating player to take a decent team to the finals, where anything can happen. He'll just have to take on a historically strong Eastern Conference to do it, and then probably deal with a very strong Lakers. Is it possible? Maybe.
@V.O. is on the New Jersey Nets (42-40)
V.O. cursed himself for ending up on the New Jersey Nets, but they aren't terrible this season, are they? V.O. is their superstar, and they've got a very solid group after him. Mind you, the members of that group are nearly universally on the last year of their contract, so it might be now or never. The Nets are also "rebuilding", mind.
@Samid is on the Cleveland Cavaliers (25-57)
A very minor decline for Samid this off-season, but it's unlikely to matter at all. His Cavaliers aren't half bad. They aren't half good either. They're just... half? It's like a very solid core to build around a superstar, except they forgot to get the superstar. Samid has two years left on his contract, but then that's never stopped him from moving teams before.
@weetee on the Atlanta Hawks (37-45)
Just looking at their squad, the Atlanta Hakws should be good. weetee forms part of a starting five that seems to have two great players, one very good player and two good-enough (?) players. He's also locked into several years left together with Tim Thomas and LeBron James, though the potential worry could be that those three combined take up a very (un)healthy part of the Atlanta salary cap.
@Dr. Dwayne on the Indiana Pacers (37-45)
Dr. Dwayne is on another one of those "superstar support staff sans superstar" squads. 67 isn't too far off, but the worry is that he'll have to do a lot of the heavy lifting on his own. He's getting too old for this shit.
@Solius & @reelworld on the Orlando Magic (44-38, 2nd Round)
"nimic", I hear you asking, "why did you decide to arbitrarily include so many bad players in the screenshot for the Magic? The answer is that there's nothing arbitrary about it; it's just the squad. The whole squad. All of it. You don't need to scroll up to the Finances screenshot to identify that the Orlando Magic are in "rebuilding" mode, they just forgot the building part of it. As a consequence, Solius and reelworld have to share the court with some very bad players. It probably doesn't help that the 4 best players on the team - the only 4 players above 42 in rating - are Guards.
Good luck.
@oneniltothearsenal and the Miami Heat (31-51)
oneniltothearsenal wished to be delivered from the dire Seattle Supersonics, and his wish was granted. He's now back on the dire Miami Heat. I think it's worth remembering that he's still among the better players in the league, and has quietly been collecting stats and awards all these years, including a lot of Double Doubles and Quadruple Doubles. Just not a lot of wins. Will that change this year, maybe?
No, it will not.
@BenitoSTARR, @Dan & @sebsheep on the New York Knicks (54-28, Conference Final)
How will the new Cafite trio manage? Expectations are high, but they may have to be tempered with the knowledge that the Knicks leadership apparently considers their team to be "rebuilding" this season. On the face of it there don't seem to be too many reasons why they would do any worse than last season, so what gives? We'll have to wait and see if the strategy has any tangible consequences.
@hobbers and the (good???) Charlotte Bobcats (42-40, 1st Round)
hobbers has been very, very slowly declining the last couple of years, but 1) that only took him to "still best player in the world", and 2) he seems to be trying to reverse it. Surprisingly the rest of the Charlotte Bobcats seem to have gone along for the ride. There are no huge changes (except maybe the signing of the pretty good Sebastian Telfair), but somehow the team just seems... better. It's possible for an 89 rating player to take a decent team to the finals, where anything can happen. He'll just have to take on a historically strong Eastern Conference to do it, and then probably deal with a very strong Lakers. Is it possible? Maybe.
@V.O. is on the New Jersey Nets (42-40)
V.O. cursed himself for ending up on the New Jersey Nets, but they aren't terrible this season, are they? V.O. is their superstar, and they've got a very solid group after him. Mind you, the members of that group are nearly universally on the last year of their contract, so it might be now or never. The Nets are also "rebuilding", mind.
@Samid is on the Cleveland Cavaliers (25-57)
A very minor decline for Samid this off-season, but it's unlikely to matter at all. His Cavaliers aren't half bad. They aren't half good either. They're just... half? It's like a very solid core to build around a superstar, except they forgot to get the superstar. Samid has two years left on his contract, but then that's never stopped him from moving teams before.
@weetee on the Atlanta Hawks (37-45)
Just looking at their squad, the Atlanta Hakws should be good. weetee forms part of a starting five that seems to have two great players, one very good player and two good-enough (?) players. He's also locked into several years left together with Tim Thomas and LeBron James, though the potential worry could be that those three combined take up a very (un)healthy part of the Atlanta salary cap.
@Dr. Dwayne on the Indiana Pacers (37-45)
Dr. Dwayne is on another one of those "superstar support staff sans superstar" squads. 67 isn't too far off, but the worry is that he'll have to do a lot of the heavy lifting on his own. He's getting too old for this shit.
@Solius & @reelworld on the Orlando Magic (44-38, 2nd Round)
"nimic", I hear you asking, "why did you decide to arbitrarily include so many bad players in the screenshot for the Magic? The answer is that there's nothing arbitrary about it; it's just the squad. The whole squad. All of it. You don't need to scroll up to the Finances screenshot to identify that the Orlando Magic are in "rebuilding" mode, they just forgot the building part of it. As a consequence, Solius and reelworld have to share the court with some very bad players. It probably doesn't help that the 4 best players on the team - the only 4 players above 42 in rating - are Guards.
Good luck.
@oneniltothearsenal and the Miami Heat (31-51)
oneniltothearsenal wished to be delivered from the dire Seattle Supersonics, and his wish was granted. He's now back on the dire Miami Heat. I think it's worth remembering that he's still among the better players in the league, and has quietly been collecting stats and awards all these years, including a lot of Double Doubles and Quadruple Doubles. Just not a lot of wins. Will that change this year, maybe?
No, it will not.
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Whoops I forgot hobbers again
@hobbers and the (good???) Charlotte Bobcats (42-40, 1st Round)
hobbers has been very, very slowly declining the last couple of years, but 1) that only took him to "still best player in the world", and 2) he seems to be trying to reverse it. Surprisingly the rest of the Charlotte Bobcats seem to have gone along for the ride. There are no huge changes (except maybe the signing of the pretty good Sebastian Telfair), but somehow the team just seems... better. It's possible for an 89 rating player to take a decent team to the finals, where anything can happen. He'll just have to take on a historically strong Eastern Conference to do it, and then probably deal with a very strong Lakers. Is it possible? Maybe.
hobbers has been very, very slowly declining the last couple of years, but 1) that only took him to "still best player in the world", and 2) he seems to be trying to reverse it. Surprisingly the rest of the Charlotte Bobcats seem to have gone along for the ride. There are no huge changes (except maybe the signing of the pretty good Sebastian Telfair), but somehow the team just seems... better. It's possible for an 89 rating player to take a decent team to the finals, where anything can happen. He'll just have to take on a historically strong Eastern Conference to do it, and then probably deal with a very strong Lakers. Is it possible? Maybe.