How to fall in love with the club again?

Think you're just getting older and your priorities are elsewhere, I used to spend my Saturday mornings watching the youth games and be glued to MUTV most of the time, into my early 20's I started to watch less and less football in general as priorities shifted, and life of an adult took over!

I still love United, but I rarely find myself compelled to set a date to watch our games now, and that started before SAF retired, obviously still look out for results, and if I know I'm doing nothing that day I'll pop the game on (only United games really) but bad results don't put me in a bad mood until the next game like they used to! Don't think I'll ever get back to the days of having to watch United no matter what, unless I won the lottery and had an extra 10hrs a day to myself.
This is exactly how I feel.
 
Even in that Moyes winter I never stopped supporting or ever missed a game because I didn't feel great about the state of things. If you ever really did support a team I don't see how you could stop.
 
Definitely am struggling to post as much on the club as I used to. Feeling of apathy at the moment.. club just seems to come across as badly run and it can get pretty frustrating to watch especially during transfer windows etc.. very hard to be excited.

Once the season starts, I am as engaged as ever but I just don't get excited over transfer windows anymore as our club more often than not, gets it wrong - last year was an exception but still nowhere near good enough for what this team needs to bring it back to the elite.
 
Stability, youth, and daring, exciting football are the answers for me. But ultimately Moyes and LVG were just bad appointments.

LVG wasn't bought in to win titles for us. He was bought in to move us away from the shadows of SAF that could end up hanging over us for a long time.

His emphasis on strict structure gave us a new foundation to work on with some of the most basic things such as possession and defending done more than adequately.

I guess some people will not ever understand it and this isn't target specifically towards you - but I hate the fact that anyone who sees positives in LVG's tenure in this forum is deemed as a troll?!

There's people then talking about United possibly changing formations back to 352, described as the formation of the premier league. United did this for a whole season amongst the top end of the table until nearly every team in the league caught up to it. Even after Lvg has gone, the squad even with Jose's signings look more than capable of pulling off a 352.

Anyway, I just had to get that off my chest.
 
I haven't 'lost my love' for the club but I think if you are criticising the OP then you are only doing so to try and prove you are some kind of Uber-fan superior to him/her in some way

I am 27 so have never known Utd as anything other than a side competing at the very top of European football. I have to admit, I do find it hard to get excited about PL matches these days when the season has been virtually over from a title-challenge perspective by November.

For example, I didn't go to the Chelsea game last year because it was slightly inconvenient. In previous years, I would have moved heaven and earth. People said to me afterwards "ooo bet you are gutted now since we won" - they are missing the point. It's not the winning or losing, its rhe context. I don't get excited about seeing us beat Chelsea to consolidate 6th position. Isn't that the kind of small time mentality we criticise other teams for?

At the same time, I dont think I have ever been as nervous about a football match as I was for the Europa League final because I knew what was at stake for my club, even if I have sat calmly through 4 CL finals
 
go to away games - if that doesn't work then I'm not sure
 
Fergie leaving had the opposite effect on me. I began to follow United more religiously day to day, and as tough as some of the garbage on the pitch has been to swallow, I definetely gained a greater appreciation for the glory years.

I'd also argue that success is a relative thing. The Europa league and league cup may not be the most prestigious of doubles, but in the context of getting off the canvas (after a moyes headbutt and LVG lowblow) and back in to the fight again - it may get reflected on as the turning point.

Saying all that, it is a bit shit to have to numb one's self to disappointing performances tbh. The second half of LVG's final season was a killer.
 
There was this old Van Der Sar quote which said that ' You see people joining and leaving clubs regularly but you never see that with Man United'. I think this sums it up pretty fairly to be honest. Under Sir Alex, the club had become a family. Players like Anderson would stick around for the longest time despite weighing the same as mother Earth. We identified with the players a lot more. Because simply put, they were here longer.

Another thing that has happened to me is that I've grown up. As a kid of 12-13, I looked "up" to Rooney,Ronaldo (and Rio). I had their posters up on my walls with dreams of maybe becoming a player like them. But I'm 22 now, and every half decent talent is younger to me. It's the same with the club. A 20 year old Rooney meant so much more to me than a 20 year old Martial.

But I refuse to believe that my love for the club has lessened. It has simply (for lack of a better word) evolved.
 
Woah relax guys, OP there is feeling worried and concern, he still is in love with the club mind (and he clarified he did) but it seems his love is less passionate than before, hence the thread and all the posted expressions of his worries. His pains and concerns post-SAF (under Moyes, LVG and Mourinho) reflect his love with the club.

However, to me, it sounds like OP's love with the club is largely influenced by Sir Alex Ferguson and his magical management, OP's relationship with players under SAF, pure entertainment SAF with his teams brought to us, and also results including titles/cups won. Like many I suppose. Each of us fans fall/fell in love with the club differently as a whole.

Anyhow, he's just asking for our opinions.

Thus..
Watching United after Ferguson's retirement hasn't been the same and there was a time when you realised that. You didn't feel the magic, you felt that it's not your team.

How to get rid of that feeling? How to fall in love with the club again?

Under Moyes watching United was simply hoping that those guys could still play just like they had done under Ferguson, we all wanted to see the change and to see them getting the results they had got under Sir Alex. It didn't happen. It was pure frustration.

Under van Gaal it was painful, really painful. I just couldn't stand watching United, even though we sometimes got some nice results. Tactics, philosophy and some strange idea for that group of players didn't help.

Mourinho is different, but it was his first season. Obviously, we can't rate him after just one season. He got his results, he gambled with UCL qualification, but he got us three trophies. Watching United is still a bit painful sometimes, but it's not like under LvG. And Mourinho has proved many times that his second seasons are better.

There are many new players, bought by Ferguson's successors, which doesn't help. When I see Pogba and Lingard, I feel as old as Pogue sometimes is when he talks about people nowadays. Is it just me? Do I moan too much? I just can't feel the relationship between me and the players anymore.

I know that I can't expect this club to be exactly the same as it was under Ferguson, but I wanted to ask how you got rid of the feeling that it's not your club and how you fell in love again.
Nope, for me that love with Manchester United is still there, and it just won't go away :D weird but knowing myself, highly doubt it will.

Of course, admittedly under Moyes and LVG, watching United felt worse and dreadful, but then again, the pain actually started in few of SAF's final seasons. Some games under SAF then are not that pretty (seasons before are full of ecstasy), but even still, I still support and follow the club, SAF and the players, and see the games as much as I can, and under Moyes and LVG, as much as I can self-resisting suddenly doze off to sleep. Under Mourinho, a lot better. The excitement is finally back for me. Somehow, there is this vibe we're going to see the real Red D. squad again, right manager and evolving squad of players. The process and plan are now more proper and exciting. Also, it's applaudable Jose shows care and concern of the club's history and philosophy.

Personally, my love with the club started yes because of SAF and some of his players, but then eventually the club's history and philosophy (heart and soul) are more resonating, sounds like fantasy yet it happened and happening, plus amazing mission and intent ~ winning, entertaining, high working effort, promoting, academy, charity, family, etc. Other than those, I feel strongly with some of the club managers, some coaches and many of the players who've played and still playing, and also the fans/supporters (somehow there's something different with this club's fans/supporters in general). Successes and the impressive trophy cabinet are awesome but those are more the usual/given results adhering to our philosophy. It's highly dependent on managers and players (and supporters) to reflect that heart and soul of the club, and for me those are inherited strongly by the likes of Valencia, Herrera, Rashford, Mourinho, Young, and Carrick among others currently performing for the club.

Eventually, I'm excited and confident :devil: we'll see true Red D. squad of Manchester United again in contemporary form, started by Sir Matt Busby twice(?), then several times by Sir Alex Ferguson. Different era, different manager, different players, different direct tactics, yet the same heart and soul. Mourinho still yet to prove that though, but very promising so far. Thankful. It's like a journey this one.
 
I can relate to the OP somewhat, but maybe differently. I'm starting to realise that it might not have been the club as a whole I was in love with, but rather the atmosphere and aura of the club under Fergie and this is besides the success, because even in the barren periods under Fergie, I was still very passionate. Maybe it was the idea that United were "special" having this manager for eons while other clubs rotated.

I just do not feel the same way or care anymore starting from Moyes. I used to have an attachment to everyone and everything about the club, right down to random U-18 players, now I just can't be bothered about much, from the manager right down to the club's current players (I don't even like anyone of them, I mean as inane as it sounds, I probably liked Darron Gibson who barely did anything for the club, than I like anyone who currently plays for United that wasn't a Fergie player). If it was success, then I'd have been overjoyed at last season, considering I've actually been wanting United to complete the euro trophy collection, but meh. I obviously knew that Fergie wouldn't manage the club forever, and I used to think that post-Fergie would be exciting, as United would be facing unknowns rather than being (almost) guaranteed success every season, but when it did happen, it felt empty. There are a few other sports I follow, which I don't follow as religiously either, so it might just be that I don't care about much anymore.
 
LVG wasn't bought in to win titles for us. He was bought in to move us away from the shadows of SAF that could end up hanging over us for a long time.

His emphasis on strict structure gave us a new foundation to work on with some of the most basic things such as possession and defending done more than adequately.

I guess some people will not ever understand it and this isn't target specifically towards you - but I hate the fact that anyone who sees positives in LVG's tenure in this forum is deemed as a troll?!

There's people then talking about United possibly changing formations back to 352, described as the formation of the premier league. United did this for a whole season amongst the top end of the table until nearly every team in the league caught up to it. Even after Lvg has gone, the squad even with Jose's signings look more than capable of pulling off a 352.

Anyway, I just had to get that off my chest.
My issue with Moyes and LVG is they stripped away the stability and winning infrastructure of our team, in removing key backroom staff and players. Some of them needed replacing but the likes of Hernandez, RVP, Rafael, Nani, Evra still had a lot to offer plus had a winning mentality and we removed that from our squad in 3 years leaving only Rooney and Carrick. I think these are subconsciously reasons some have 'fallen out of love' with the club.

LVG just seemed to drain the confidence out of our squad and surpressed any imagination in our play, which I think we are still suffering from, and his methods seemed outdated. He got us top 4 (with no european commitments), and the FA cup which we needed and also gave debuts to the likes of rashford (some say he stumbled upon him but I dont buy that) and signed martial as positives. I think most just felt dissappointed by LVG, I certainly was.
 
I cant say I’ve fallen out if love with United. The emotions may have changed slightly over the last couple of years post-fergie. It hasn’t really got much to do with success, but more to do with the personnel.

I grew up during the Fergie era. Ferguson’s United was the only United i knew. He joined them before i was born, so obviously for people around my age, when he left it was a huge shock to the system and was obviously going to change the emotional attachment you had for the club to a certain extent. Like i said, i still love the club (always will), but it’s certainly different.

For all the talk of the club being bigger than any individual (it is), you can’t deny the impact that the great man has had on this club, especially to the fans who only know United under Fergie. He was Mr. Man Utd.

We’ve had three managers since, and i haven’t really had a connection to any of them. Moyes was just a charisma vacuum, and LVG just came across as the village idiot to me. That’s not to belittle him as a coach, as he’s obviously been very successful, but i just found myself laughing AT him for most of the time. And the less said about his football, the better. As for Jose…he’s a hard guy to get behind. Obviously my main concern is the club, so i will continue to support him.

I will aim to watch every United game of the season, as i always do, and will always love the club for as long as i live, but it does feel very different.
 
"happened to 90% of us " :lol:

nah. United is embedded in me
 
I think our constant idiocy in the transfer market has been a large contributory factor. We were bad in the last few years under Fergie but his sheer brilliance negated that. We've literally been awful since then.
 
@Maciek I understand where you're coming from. LVG's second season almost made me want to stop watching our games altogether. And some parts of Jose's season weren't much better. Other parts were much better though, when the players managed to raise the performance towards the end of a game and get a result rather than going through the motions as under LVG.

The manager turnaround, the amount of squad comings and goings, and the lack of players who consistently put in great performances and play their hearts out like the game means everything to them (Herrera one of the few), all this plays a part in the amount of passion one might feel for the club.

Exciting football and great players who stay for a long time so that you get to know them, helps with making games something to really look forward to, rather than something I do out of habit.

Hoping next season will be better (ironically this depends on new players being brought in again)
 
I do miss us winning away, playing great stuff with serious heart and the advertising and showboating and money was secondary. It seems like the last few years we are just the champions of wasting money and showing off how rich and well supported we are and not much else. The internet and all the extra money in football is as much to blame I suppose. The gulf between the fans and big clubs and even the average players is bigger than ever too. The players are just selling a lifestyle most of us fans can only dream of and their personal celebrity is bigger than ever. Most of these guys aren't particularly smart or interesting or even that successful (in footballing terms)at the end of the day. they are given all of this while achieving very little on the pitch and in all probability caring very little about whichever club they are playing for. That can be frustrating. The old guard would come back ready to win year after year with only the really important stories making the news, there so much news now and most of it is nothing. Football is changing a lot and I'm fine with us pushing the market in the way that we are, it's smart. nearly every other club wishes they could do the same. Ill always support United but I want players who love the club to be spine of the team. I want to see a plan put into place for the next few years with some genuinely exciting young players pushing for first team spots instead of having to sign them for 50 million when they've half developed at another club. Having a steady manager or general manager should go some way towards rectifying that.
 
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(...) I think if you are criticising the OP then you are only doing so to try and prove you are some kind of Uber-fan superior to him/her in some way.
With every post in this "discussion", I began to think it's true indeed.

"United are embedded in me", Christ.
 
My issue with Moyes and LVG is they stripped away the stability and winning infrastructure of our team, in removing key backroom staff and players. Some of them needed replacing but the likes of Hernandez, RVP, Rafael, Nani, Evra still had a lot to offer plus had a winning mentality and we removed that from our squad in 3 years leaving only Rooney and Carrick. I think these are subconsciously reasons some have 'fallen out of love' with the club.

LVG just seemed to drain the confidence out of our squad and surpressed any imagination in our play, which I think we are still suffering from, and his methods seemed outdated. He got us top 4 (with no european commitments), and the FA cup which we needed and also gave debuts to the likes of rashford (some say he stumbled upon him but I dont buy that) and signed martial as positives. I think most just felt dissappointed by LVG, I certainly was.

I get that buddy. The thing is the club can have all the winning structure it wants from SAF's tenure but ultimately it won't guarantee anybody success especially since the main man left. We needed to get back to basics and LVG has proven to be the best manager in the world at getting the biggest clubs in the world to getting teams back to basics. Though this can be hard to see - can you imagine if we hired Jose after SAF or Moyes? We would go through a period of guaranteed success before having to restart at square one again when things get bad.

By getting LVG we had a manger who built us purely around the basics of possesion and defending and This correlates with the draining of confidence. Jose has now come in and can add all the attacking flair/ winning mentality we need; ultimately after he has gone - I believe we will still have a squad that is able to hold possesion and defend well due to the basics LVG would have instilled from the ground up ( he was regarded as trying to fully van gaalise Bayern Munich).

With regards to the 'love of the club' - united fans have always been called glory hunters and whether we like it or not; part of that is true to some level. I am telling you we are on an upward winning trajectory due to Jose and we have an ounce of stability due to the basic way LVG forced us to play football. In this new era - LVG was just the man to teach us how to ride a bike again, Jose and future managers will get us doing all the bycicle tricks to get us back to the top of the world again.

Final thing I want to say is - Bayern and Barcelona have chopped and changed managers from guardiola(great) to Enrique(average imo) to ancelotti(proven); from managers that just started their careers to proven winners, they consistently have an ounce of stability and success at these clubs. It is that consistency that makes these clubs terrifying in my eyes - I believe that this stability is something we have now and we just need to focus on getting stronger and stronger every year.
 
The tough times are the times you realize if you really love the club or not. If you withstand these years and certain enthusiastic to watch every game whatever painful it's, then you really love the team.
 
The opposite of how to make friends which is where you tell a girl you love her and she just wants to be friends. Tell the club you only see it as a friend and nothing will ever happen between you two, it will move on and leave you alone, then when you see what fun it has without you, you will fall in love again.
 
We've won 4 trophies in 14 months, if you still don't love them, it's going to take a boob job and a face lift
 
I presume you didn't lost emotional connection entirely despite difficulties but hard times in relationship, stagnations, disappointment - it will all pass in time and passion will return.

The club doing quite a lot these days to change, it's hard not to appreciate the will and work behind the scenes.
 
Dunno why OP is getting grief. Results aside, it's not easy to get used to supporting the club through a procession of different managers when you've spent over two decades supporting a club whose identity was so wrapped up in the personality of the man in charge. Favourite players could come and go but Fergie was always there, doing his thing. It's only natural for such a radical change to affect our relationship with the club. I define feel a lot less emotionally engaged than I did when SAF was still in charge.

The relentless turnover of players hasn't helped. It's hard to get used to when you spent so long watching a team where a bunch of first team regulars have come through the ranks and you followed their career since they were kids. Again, it's only natural that this will weaken the connection between the club and the fans.

So yeah, I absolutely feel less passion for the club than I did a few years ago. It would be nice to get that back. Mind you, I'm starting to accept that might never happen. We should appreciate being part of such a unique and special era and start getting used to being "normal" football fans supporting a "normal" club. That's just the way it is now and will be for the forseeable future. Ho hum.
Brilliantly put. I started supporting Utd when I was 11 in 2002 and from that time there were things that were always constant. Many of the players we had at that time, like Scholes, Giggs, Neville, Ferdinand, Brown all stayed for long periods at the club. The young players we brought, the likes of Rooney and Ronaldo also were there for a long period of time. SAF of course was there. You had a connection with every player at the club. The likes of Park, Evra, Vidic were all our players. We made them what they were. Utd was like a family to me,where everyone was there for each other. We played entertaining stuff, those thrilling comebacks,even when they didn't occur, you knew the team was fighting for it. They were fighting for the spirit and family SAF created.

Now when I see us I often wonder what is this team fighting for? Every transfer window we buy 4-5 players and there is no gurantee they will be here for long, heck there is no gurantee even our manager will be here for long. It raises the question of what do you become attached to? People talk about being attached to the club but the club itself is made up of people who constitute it. How is it possible to be attached to the club if you are not attached to the people in it?

During the Moyes season even though we were inept I never felt the lack of that thrill. This was still our Utd. But then came LVG and he sold half our squad and replaced them with expensive acquisitions, who could never be totally Utd through and through (with a few exceptions like Herrera and Shaw). Why would Di Maria, Schweinsteiger, Falcao feel any special playing for us? They had already played for other massive clubs first and would always hold them in higher regard than they would do us. And that's exactly how it transpired.

I can never stop loving Utd. My day still begins and ends with reading or watching about Utd, but I no longer feel that sense of togetherness and unity we used to have earlier. As Pogue says we became from a special club to a normal club and it has nothing to with trophies, it has everything to do with the spirit of the people who constitute the club.
 
@Maciek

I agree with the OP to an extent. The past 3-4 years have taken it out of me as well. The next bit is quite pretentious:

I have been supporting Utd for just over 27 years and was used to Utd not being very successful. The prime SAF years felt like I had won the lottery. Now all the lottery money has been spent and I am an emotional pauper once more. I still love the club but it is difficult adjusting to a lesser life, knowing what you had before.
 
Dunno why OP is getting grief. Results aside, it's not easy to get used to supporting the club through a procession of different managers when you've spent over two decades supporting a club whose identity was so wrapped up in the personality of the man in charge. Favourite players could come and go but Fergie was always there, doing his thing. It's only natural for such a radical change to affect our relationship with the club. I define feel a lot less emotionally engaged than I did when SAF was still in charge.

The relentless turnover of players hasn't helped. It's hard to get used to when you spent so long watching a team where a bunch of first team regulars have come through the ranks and you followed their career since they were kids. Again, it's only natural that this will weaken the connection between the club and the fans.

So yeah, I absolutely feel less passion for the club than I did a few years ago. It would be nice to get that back. Mind you, I'm starting to accept that might never happen. We should appreciate being part of such a unique and special era and start getting used to being "normal" football fans supporting a "normal" club. That's just the way it is now and will be for the forseeable future. Ho hum.

This post echoes my feelings entirely and one that we can all relate to.

@OP
The fact that you posted your feelings on the matter shows you care to some extent, probably a lot more than you realise. That said, do not despair, your feelings can and very likely will change given time. How much time is impossible to say, but you could expediate the process by accepting the situation for how it is, rather than how you would prefer it to be.

Things will never be the same as they were under Fergie.
 
I never fell out of love with the club but the Moyes era was really really bad.
I was intrigued with the LVG era, only really being bored and annoyed from December 15 - May 2016.

Really happy with the Mourinho era, we've played some good football and created loads of chances. Lets not forget we started to play worse off when top 4 was out of reach but that is acceptable as we were focusing on Europa and we got that and are in CL altogether.
 
Okay, that's something which (has) happened to, I guess, about 90% of us.

No. Your guess is way off. We won an FA cup with LvG and a cup and EL with Jose. I am surprised that you didn't enjoy the campaign. Yes, it would be nice to have a PL challenge, but it would take time and patience.
Last season, we did play some good football and if it were not for our performances in the goal scoring department, we would have been awesome. I don't remember a season where so many opposition goalkeepers turned on their best mode or the ball hit posts and bounced out so often.
 
This.

We suck but I still love United.

Defeats still ruin my weekends, I still spend days on end following transfer news and wake up at wee hours of the morning to watch pre-season friendlies against weak teams.


And I absolutely love it all.

This is how I feel as well. Even though I started supporting Toronto FC (I mean proper support, not just following them casually), United always take the top priority in my heart. When we won the FA Cup, League Cup, and Europa League in the past couple of years, I felt elated, and my days were rosy. Whenever we lost/got a bad result, my days felt gloomier. The fact that I still go through an emotional roller coaster with Man. Utd. even after strongly supporting Toronto FC says it all for me.

@Maciek Why don't you try supporting a local team in Poland for a bit? Maybe give them some more time, and see if that reignites your interest in United.
 
I've been very frustrated after SAF left but that's because I love the club but I'm always looking forward to a new season with great expectation. Maybe You've been frustrated not lost your love for the club?
 
No. Your guess is way off. We won an FA cup with LvG and a cup and EL with Jose. I am surprised that you didn't enjoy the campaign. Yes, it would be nice to have a PL challenge, but it would take time and patience.
Last season, we did play some good football and if it were not for our performances in the goal scoring department, we would have been awesome. I don't remember a season where so many opposition goalkeepers turned on their best mode or the ball hit posts and bounced out so often.

Not everyone assoiciates winning trophies with their love for the club.

Far from it in fact.
 
Not everyone assoiciates winning trophies with their love for the club.

Far from it in fact.
And it is not like people who love the club do not love winning trophies. Anyways, I was talking about the campaign which eventually ended in lifting the trophy. Not asking people to love the club because we won a trophy.
 
And it is not like people who love the club do not love winning trophies. Anyways, I was talking about the campaign which eventually ended in lifting the trophy. Not asking people to love the club because we won a trophy.

Apologies if I misinterpreted your post, but it kind of came across as if you were associating winning with your support of the club, like they are universally linked in some way. Needless to say that view would be false.

no offense intended.
 
Dunno why OP is getting grief. Results aside, it's not easy to get used to supporting the club through a procession of different managers when you've spent over two decades supporting a club whose identity was so wrapped up in the personality of the man in charge. Favourite players could come and go but Fergie was always there, doing his thing. It's only natural for such a radical change to affect our relationship with the club. I define feel a lot less emotionally engaged than I did when SAF was still in charge.

The relentless turnover of players hasn't helped. It's hard to get used to when you spent so long watching a team where a bunch of first team regulars have come through the ranks and you followed their career since they were kids. Again, it's only natural that this will weaken the connection between the club and the fans.

So yeah, I absolutely feel less passion for the club than I did a few years ago. It would be nice to get that back. Mind you, I'm starting to accept that might never happen. We should appreciate being part of such a unique and special era and start getting used to being "normal" football fans supporting a "normal" club. That's just the way it is now and will be for the forseeable future. Ho hum.

Agree with this.

I was around in the pre-SAF era but didn't support Man Utd or any other football club. What surprised me was the discovery that my feelings for United were strongly influenced by Fergie's personality. After his departure I didn't feel the same way about a club whose public emblem was David Moyes.