Can anyone recall a tie with 5 truly absurd goals against?

The first leg goals were just mistakes from players that can happen with any team.

The first and third tonight were just hilarious self sabotage. Maguire will probably get moat of the stick for the first nut De Gea was at it all game. He kept appearing onto the side of the TV camera view in situations where he definitely shouldn't have.

What was he even trying to do with the third one? Volley a ball first time to Maguire after it's come a mile out of the air? You wouldn't trust Paul Scholes to do that never mind a goalkeeper who's already in full circus mode
 
noodlehair said:
The first leg goals were just mistakes from players that can happen with any team.

The first and third tonight were just hilarious self sabotage. Maguire will probably get moat of the stick for the first nut De Gea was at it all game. He kept appearing onto the side of the TV camera view in situations where he definitely shouldn't have.

What was he even trying to do with the third one? Volley a ball first time to Maguire after it's come a mile out of the air? You wouldn't trust Paul Scholes to do that never mind a goalkeeper who's already in full circus mode
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De Gea is beyond repair in this regard. He’s been a great keeper for us but I expect nothing from except for an oscillation between great shot stopping and a disaster on the ball.

I really really hope ETH intends on replacing him this summer otherwise we’ll continue to be a team that teams know they can break with a decent press.
 
Winrar said:
Wasn't there a really ridiculously comical goal we conceded in the CL couple years ago against a Turkish team that eventually doomed us?

Repeat that 5 times and that was basically the entire tie... we properly shot ourselves in the foot... after being 2-0 up.
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Yes, when Ole was coach. We had everyone attack from a corner kick and they just hoofed it up to their striker who was all alone against our keeper.
 
PSG was at the other end of 3 absurd goals in that famous game in Paris against us.

Misplaced back pass. Buffon spilled a tame shot. A shot likely went off target ended up as a penalty due to handball
 
Sgreddevil said:
We have only ourselves to blame for self sabotaging. All thanks to the 2 clowns De Gea and Maguire.
I hope we don't see them for the rest of season and future.
Gonna be a bad week. Getting thrown out of europa league and fa cup consecutively. I just can't see how we can beat an impressive Brighton team with De Gea and Maguire on our side.
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It’s not just down to those two. It’s ingrained the culture at our club and has been for 10 years.

We are a journeyman club these days, we don’t win titles and keep players for 10 years like Martial for example.
 
The first and third goals yesterday were ridiculous mistakes, but the second goal was a weird freak. When does someone ever shoulder it in top corner like that?
 
Shane88 said:
1 is unlucky. 2 is freak-ish.

5 is staggering levels of incompetence.
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1st is Malacia's brainfart but also freakish - it required TWO deflections to get into the goal.
2nd is pure freakishness - the header was going miles off.
3rd is an idiotic feck up that actually didn't happen for a long time. It included at least one if not two brainfarts. Maguire was involved, naturally.
4th is a shoulder lob - pure freakishness.
5th is another idiotic feck up but also pretty freakish - you don't see that level of brainfarts every day.

Yes, yesterday's performance was unacceptable. Yes, we were complacent in the first leg - especially Ten Hag, which is unexpected.

However, what happened vs Sevilla - including injuries to our two first-choice CBs and Bruno's completely unjustifiable yellow card - points to some proper voodoo witchcraft on their side, and I'm not even joking. (Although I am)

It was obvious after the shoulder lob that it just wasn't meant to be.

It could not be further from the 7:0 drubbing. Almost all of Liverpool's goals - besides the last two - were excellent.

This was a circus.
 
VidaMata said:
1st is Malacia's brainfart but also freakish - it required TWO deflections to get into the goal.
2nd is pure freakishness - the header was going miles off.
3rd is an idiotic feck up that actually didn't happen for a long time. It included at least one if not two brainfarts. Maguire was involved, naturally.
4th is a shoulder lob - pure freakishness.
5th is another idiotic feck up but also pretty freakish - you don't see that level of brainfarts every day.

Yes, yesterday's performance was unacceptable. Yes, we were complacent in the first leg - especially Ten Hag, which is unexpected.

However, what happened vs Sevilla - including injuries to our two first-choice CBs and Bruno's completely unjustifiable yellow card - points to some proper voodoo witchcraft on their side, and I'm not even joking. (Although I am)

It was obvious after the shoulder lob that it just wasn't meant to be.

It could not be further from the 7:0 drubbing. Almost all of Liverpool's goals - besides the last two - were excellent.

This was a circus.
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I summarize it to 50 % freakishness and 50 % brainfartiness. The shoulder lob takes the prize for me. It takes a real pro to put it upper left corner "on purpose" with the shoulder.
 
There’s some voodoo at play when we play Sevilla

They’ll win the europa league purely to play us in the champions league next season and knock us out again with the first ever goal scored by the ball getting stuck up someone’s arse and then being farted forcibly out and into the goal
 
The moment Spurs did us 6-1 everyone knew that the Maguire, Lindelof and De Gea combination cannot work. Maguire has no pace and on the ball technique, Lindelof has no aerial ability or willingness to get stuck in, De Gea generally makes the wrong decision in everything he does if he has to think.

As the opponent, you just have to force the mistakes out from the first minute with high energy. Pressure them all day long through pressing and set pieces, and the cracks will appear and the complete collapse comes soon after.

This trio will give you unbelievable goals all day long and you don't even have to play fantastic football to earn it.
 
The two own goals last week were rotten luck but last night's were our own doing. All things considered Sevilla deserved to go through.
 
Annihilate Now! said:
Literally every single one has required some form of utter freak comical shitness from us or a huge slice of luck (or with the Malacia OG... both).

It's unbelievable really... I don't think I've ever seen anything like it.

I mean we've been total shit and deserve nothing... But Sevilla have some absolute crazy voodoo shit in their corner.
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You’re dead right. Anyone mentioning the Liverpool game is missing the point. I can’t ever think of a two leg tie with so many goals where every single one was either freakish (crazy own goals or scored with a long range shoulder) or an absolute howler of an individual error. Five goals conceded and not one down to quality opposition play.

The Karius horror show for Liverpool was similar but can’t think of anything else.
 
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