Bring Me The Horizon

I was in the same class as Lee Malia and Curtis Ward, a little pseudo claim to fame! ;)
 
Lee was quiet, Curtis was a funny bastard...

EDIT - Curtis loved his porn, was the only 14 year old kid I knew who got his kicks out of S&M, the depraved individual :lol:
 
Curtis was the class clown, so people definately knew who he was. Had a warped sense of humour to go along with his depraved pervasions lol

Lee was really quiet, opened up a bit more when he got a bit older, but on the whole, really quiet...
 
Yep, I'd agree with that sentiment...

On an aside, he hasnt half lost weight, he used to be a right fodgy pucker!
 
Bring-Me-The-Horizon-There-Is-A-Hell-Believe-Me-Ive-Seen-It-There-Is-A-Heaven-Lets-Keep-It-A-Secret-2010.jpg
 
A review of the new "album" from my favourite metal site. They always spell "fecking", "fecken." I am sure there is a reason for it.

“THIS CD IS WATERMARKED AND IS MATCHED TO EACH RECIPIENT! We appreciate your support and interest in our artist and their music, please respect this artist’s work by keeping this CD safe and not allowing other people access to it either physically or digitally.”

Some time ago I started out a review pretty much exactly like that. It felt good so I decided to do it again. I love these silly little half-CDR’s that labels tend to send these days. Information consists of a xeroxed bullshit note with nothing but the band name, tracklisting, album title and most importantly: this shit about the CD being watermarked, meaning if I give it to someone – E.T. will return from space on his fecken bicycle, track me the feck down and ass-rape me with a caterpillar. Vaseline not included. Alien-style sex FTW!

Do not sweat it, dear record label. I wouldn’t give this disc to anyone. I will do my best to actually destroy it like Chuck Liddell used to destroy Tito “The Huntington Beach Cry Baby” Ortiz back in the day. Hell no, I won’t spread it. It’s my duty to keep all of this American Plague Metal away from the public. Yeah, I know – Bring Me The Whore Ass, Son is not from the US, they are a bunch of filthy carriers of bad teeth hailing from the U.K. It doesn’t fecken help them one bit though.

This is garbage.

I don’t think there’s one genre I despise more than this one (I lump it together with the New Wave Of American Plague Metal, just becoz I can). A band that is fecken non-metal, pretending to be metal without actually having the slightest idea about metal at all – that’s this band.

Absolutely repulsive.

And look at that fecken album title. What kind of bullshit is that, really? If you are trying to be pretentious, at least fecken try to come up with something worthwhile instead of this absolutely ridiculous crap. “There is a hell, believe me I’ve seen it. There is a heaven, let’s keep it a secret”. I mean, seriously… I can come up with at least three better titles in 2 seconds. Don’t believe me? Trust me, I’ve seen it, but let’s keep it a secret, ok? Just hear me out:

1. “Cock’n‘balls in all of yo’ mouths (believe me, you’ll see it)”

2. “Gargle this semen (but keep it a secret from your parents, they would go apeshit if they see it)”

3. “I can eat ass 24/7 (if you can believe it I will keep it a secret and then you will see it)”

There you go. 3 titles in less than 2 seconds, all of which pisses on the one these retards went for in the end. Guys, seriously… feck you. feck you for existing.

Yeah, so I won’t take up any more of your time – I know you give as little of a feck about this band as I do. If you even made it this far into the review I applaud you. You have given these idiots all the attention they deserve. You now know to stay away from this shit, and hopefully bands and labels around the world will understand that we are not really supporters of plague metal. This disease needs no cure. It needs to die and it needs to be erased from the map of metal.

Here’s to hoping we never get to hear another word about these feck-whistles ever again. Just look at the sorry bastards. Just fecken die already.

2/10

ONE OR TWO GOOD RIFFS, OR WHATEVER, ARE NOT ENOUGH TO ESCAPE THE NOOSE. DIE.
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Wow. What a terrible review. Irrespective of whether the album is good or not, he admits to hating the genre. Such an obvious agenda. I'd be surprised if the reviewer even listened to the album. He makes no reference to the actual music, just pokes fun at the album title and continually reiterates his hatred for the band and genre. Very gay.
 
They suck the shit out of a dead wino's bubbling asshole. Knock it off.
 
They've grown on me.

Basically since i saw 'em live and had a top gig.
 
I was pretty much the same. Had listened to them a bit, then saw them live are thought they were fecking well alright.
 
I've got something to say.

I killed a baby today.

But it doesn't mean that much to me.

As long as it is dead.

:cool:
 
While they're not that bad BMTH are still gay feckers.

So i introduced some Misfits to man it up.
 
BMTH and Architects new albums coupled with ADTR's piss poor effort (two in a row) and two members leaving Misery Signals earlier this month...Been a pretty shite year for metal all round.

Parkway Drive's album is the last shred of hope left.

That and Glassjaw still being fecking amazing.
 
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