Who wins in a fight…?

TheReligion

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United managers since SAF;

Moyes
LvG
Mourinho
Ole
Rangnick
Ten Hag

Rate then hardest to softest (@rimaldo keep your mind from the gutter please)
 
Moyes would destroy everyone on the list.

Mourinho would fight dirty and resort to biting and hair pulling (plus eye gouging) almost immediately. Also the most likely to run away.

Ole and Ten Hag would have age on their side vs LvG and Rangnick. I reckon Ten Hag would take Ole.

Assumed fighting ability (from best to worst):

Moyes
Ten Hag
Ole
Mourinho
Rangnick
LvG
 
Solskjaer surely would be bottom in a fight? I think if you physically provoked him into a fist fight, he’d probably start crying.
 
Ole would cower behind the biggest man, van Gaal.

van Gaal would target Mourinho as the manager who succeeded him behind his back.

Rangnick would use van Gaal's blind fury as an opportunity to take him out.

Mourinho would be flinging sand from his pocket into eyes and biting and eye gouging anyone within reach.

Moyes would be headbutting left, right, and centre.

Ten Hag would study from afar.

My guess, Moyes and Mourinho the final two with Mourinho the victor.
 
I think Ole wins because he used to be a wrestler, I think most of the rest of them tw*t Jose who’s a bit of a coward I think. Ragnick is more of a lover and a thinker though. He’d probably beat them at scrabble.
 
Mourinho with the Ric Flair antics, dirty player and blaming the other managers for things he did making them fight each other
 
Jeppers7 said:
I think Ole wins because he used to be a wrestler, I think most of the rest of them tw*t Jose who’s a bit of a coward I think. Rangnick is more of a lover and a thinker though. He’d probably beat them at scrabble.
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Ole would win at scrabble.. he would just add an Y to every word everyone else places. Rashy, Carricky, Jonesey.
 
Calls for a Summer Slam six man hell in a cell showdown. With Giggs as a special guest referee.
 
Moyes would win easily.

He would have to target Ole first because if Moyes concentrated on the others then Ole would have a mile head start and it would take a unnecessary extra 30 minutes to track him down.
 
Jose easily.

Jose would fight dirty, horse shoe inside his glove ….or hiding an AK47 behind his back in a pistol duel :devil:
 
I think LvG thumps them all.

Rest of them would probably roll over and cry in the face of an actual physical confrontation.
 
I'd plumb for Van Gaal.
He is a proper fruit loop, you don't muck about with fruit loops.
 
Those managers are either fairly old or fairly fragile.
I don't think there would actually be a winner in a royal rumble type event, they'd all be on the floor knackered.
 
it’s a tricky one. moyes would have no problems throwing a combination of uno, dos, tres, cuatro punches.

lvg was always a great proponent of ‘horny fighting’ which is basically form of krav maga where he clings on and dry humps the limbs of opponents.

mourinho prefers to throw sand in people’s eyes and scream like a cat in their ears.

ole invites people to join his fight cloob, where he spends all of his time fighting himself and coming up with rules like “first rule of fight cloob is you can turn up late.”

rangnick just talks about how great he is at fighting but never actually shows off any moves.

ten hag just turns up and throws a basic couple of jabs into a punch bag and fan’s cream themselves.
 
Moyes (but only while possessing the one ring)
Ole (viking blood must count for something)
Rangnick (burly German, would rank higher if he wasn't that old)
LVG / Mourinho (Neither would be able to ever accept defeat, but are too weak to beat most of their opponents)
Ten Hag (poundland Arne Slot and everyone knows Ajax people have no panache or fighting spirit)
 
Van Gaal if he was a bit younger. Comes across as someone who'd be a bit scary when angry.

People are saying Mourinho but even Wenger shoved him a couple of times without batting an eye lid.
 
Moyes, he is scottish which means that he doesn't run on water.
 
Moyes. He's a hard feker that one.
Jose, as it was said, would fight dirty and count on that.
LVG is crazy, dont know what to expect from him, he'd try a few punches and if that wouldnt go he'd try something crazy.
Ole would try to hug anyone who'd want to fight him.
Ragnick would cry and run away probably and jury is still out on Ten Hag. He'd probably give a fight to anyone.
 
Ole wins hands down. He's the youngest and was the most recent professional athlete out of all of them.
 
I think Ole trained as a wrestler when he was a kid, same as his father, before he realized he was too scrawny for that sport. He might have a few takedowns in memory.
 
Anyone not saying Van Gaal must've forgotten what a crazy old bastard he is. He'd use vey underhanded trick in the book. Feign injury, groin kicks, dirt in the eyes, pulling the suit jacket up over the head while sweeping the legs out from underneath. All you got to do is look at their eyes. Van Gaal's are the craziest.
 
All the youngsters going for the younger guys have not experienced old man strength.
 
If it was years ago Van gaal would batter the lot.
 
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