15/16 Season Preview Part 3
@Samid @P-Nut @Solius @Dan @hobbers @Dr. Dwayne @Stobzilla @BenitoSTARR @reelworld @The Cat
Dan II - Detroit Pistons (45-37)
Dan II is... well, he's just
Dan II, innit? There's not a lot to say here, as it's the exact same situation as last season. The good news is that it's very unlikely that he'll miss the 3 Point Contest due to injury.
hobbers - Boston Celtics (66-16, Conference Finals)
That's the biggest stat decrease
hobbers has seen yet. Of course, that means he's 37 years old and still one of the 10 test players in the league.
Easily. The Celtics aren't quite the juggernauts they were last season, but then neither are the Wizards. They're still really, really good. Of course, suddenly the West is stronger than it has been in ages, so getting through the East might not be enough for a ring.
Dr. Junior - Cleveland Cavaliers (36-46)
I can only assume getting better endurance and basketball IQ is good for rookies, because so many of them do that their first year.
Dr. Junior is an immediately good player in any case, and his Cavaliers are
decent. They're lacking that one superstar that they probably need to make a good playoff run, but that might be
Dr. Junior in a few years.
Stobzilla II and BenitoSTARR - New York Knicks (34-48)
BenitoSTARR is not the
man hammer he once was. The handle is a bit cracked, and the head is getting rusty. He's still perfectly able to put up some stats, but he's not going to be dragging any team to the playoffs on his own. He didn't last year, in any case.
Stobzilla II might be picking up some of the slack, though, as he's turning into quite a strong player. Both will need to be good if the Knicks are to have any chance at all of making the playoffs.
reelworld II - Milwaukee Bucks (32-50)
I bet you all forgot about
reelworld II. He's still around, and he's improving. At 22 he's already basically a superstar. His challenge is that while the Bucks have an
okay starting 5, there's simply nothing else worth talking about in the entire team. The playoffs aren't quite out of the question, but they will need that superstar season from our man.
The Cub and Dr. Dwayne - Oklahoma City Thunder (18-64) - this is the entire squad. They have their own pick, at least.
Oh hey, it's the new worst team in the league. They were the old worst team in the league, and then they got even worse. They have one (1) very good player -
The Cub - and then a bunch of nothing. Well, and
Dr. Dwayne, but he's practically dead at this point. I think the game is telling us that he should retire, and he might just do it on his own. Of course, a lot of that decline is in speed and jumping, which means he can still score some points. Just don't save it for the playoffs.
Solius - New Orleans Pelicans (19-63)
Solius is just looking to enjoy his last few years, I'm assuming. He managed to convince the Pelicans to pay him massive wages through his 40th birthday. He's still a
very good player, mind, particularly considering his decline is largely physical as well. He
is going to score a lot of points. Could he score enough points to make the playoffs this year? No, don't be silly.
P-Nut - Denver Nuggets (31-51)
P-Nut is a bit like Solius, just not as old. He's still a very good player, but he's showing clear signs of decline. But he's also still a fantastic shooter in a shooting era, so he's bound to score
a lot of points. The Nuggets aren't terrible on paper, but they're lacking depth. It doesn't help that Joel Embiid is going to be out for the entire season. It would take a miracle for them to make the playoffs, but remember when The Cat managed to win that ring on his own? You just have to believe.
Samid - Minnesota Timberwolves (41-41, 1st Round)
Samid is still Samiding around the league. He actually got a bit better, incredibly. And while he didn't improve enough to see him play a lot of actual basketball, at this point I'm pretty sure he's sustaining his old body solely on the ambition to finally win that 3 Point Contest. I doubt those +3 points in rebounding are going to do much this season, but those +3 points in three pointers might...
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