Gaming The RedCafe NBA Simulation 30/31 | Conference Finals - 2031 NBA Final Up Next | Are the Phoenix Suns going to murder you? | BasketballGM

altodevil said:
When did the grizz get the #1 pick, for god sake sontodevil kills fatherdevil
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The Suns traded it to the Spurs in 2011 for Jackie Butler, and then the Spurs traded it to the Grizzlies the year after for their 2016 pick. Then Phoenix had the 4th worst record, but won the draft lottery.

Nobbers going to Spurs was also unlikely. They had the 8th worst record but got the 2nd pick with a 2.7% chance.
 
Does the game just generate players once we hit the future?
 
13/14 Season Preview - East
13/14 Season Preview East


@hobbers & @Skizzo - Boston Celtics (72-10, Conference Finals)
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The Celtics are worse than last year, let's get that straight. hobbers, Skizzo and most of the best players got a little bit worse. Well, let's be clear again: both hobbers and Skizzo got quite a bit worse, particularly athletically. They're still on the best team in the league, though, and their depth did get a little bit better. There's definitely still a chance for them to get their ring.


@reelworld - Milwaukee Bucks (37-45)
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reelworld II is having the season that everyone has had so far, where they've improved the previous seasons and suddenly get a little bit worse. If he was 35 I'd be worried for him, but at 20 he'll almost certainly get better still. The youngest peak so far has been at 22, so our man should easily be pushing the 70s in overall rating.


@sebsheep - Miami Heat (34-48)
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SebJr has yet to take that leap forward that we've been waiting for, though he's still actually playing quite well. He's also got plenty of time to improve. His team seems better than in a while, at least on papers. The Heat have built a very deep team, even if they don't quite have a superstar to lead them.


@weetee - Atlanta Hawks (39-43, 1st Round)
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weetee scraped into the playoffs last season with the Hawks, and I guess there's no reason he couldn't do the same this time. It would probably be another scrape job, however. weetee himself declined a bit over the summer, but only physically (and also dunking, which I reckon he wasn't doing too much of anyway).


@V.O. - Brooklyn Nets (58-24, 2nd Round)
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It's an epidemic. V.O. is another example of the looming specter of infirmity as players approach their mid 30s. Most of that is still in physicality, though, and those have never been the most important parts of his game. As long as he's an elite dribbler, shooter and passer, with high offensive IQ, he's going to be able to find assists and points. The Nets did get worse, but it's not like they were "the best" when they won their ring anyway.


@oneniltothearsenal - Toronto Raptors (37-45)
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Two Nil is doing the same thing as reelworld II, namely taking a break in improvement. In his case it's more like he hasn't started it yet, as he's only 18. He's got all the time in the world, essentially. He's found a spot on the Raptors, and it's not like they'll need him to be great right away, so that's... good?


@BenitoSTARR & @Stobzilla - New York Knicks (55-27, 1st Round)
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BenitoSTARR is into his 15th year with the New York Knicks now. It's been a while since he was winning MVPs and challenging for (and winning) championships, but you get the impression it could suddenly happen. He got a little bit worse over the summer, but he's still good. His teammate Stobzilla II seems to have settled as a very good - but not superstar - Center. Although I've noticed that particularly Centers can have quite the impact without ridiculous overall ratings.


@Samid - Charlotte Bobcats (19-63)
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Samid has been part of some truly awful teams so far this experiment. I mean really, truly horrible teams. And last season was no exception, as his Bobcats finished with a dismal 19-63 record. They didn't even have their own pick to profit off it. They've seem to have done some work over the summer, though, as most of the team got better. Even old man Samid improved his skills somewhat.
 
13/14 Season Preview - West
13/14 Season Preview West (Part 1+2 on the previous page)

@hobbers @altodevil @The Cat @Dr. Dwayne @P-Nut @Salt Bailly @Solius


altodevil - Los Angeles Lakers (51-31, 2nd Round)
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The slow-ish decline continues for altodevil, who has now entered his 18th year in the NBA. As before his physicality has been hit the hardest, though now his technical skills are starting to (very slightly) fade. He's still a defensive powerhouse, so he's not quite done yet. The same goes for the Lakers, who might even be overall better with the improvements for Kemba Walker.


The Cub - Oklahoma City Thunder (22-60)
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A bit of an off-year for The Cub, another one for the "young player who suddenly gets a tiny bit worse". I'd be surprised if he didn't make 75 rating or even more, but either way he's already a very good player. Probably not good enough to pull the Thunder into the playoffs though. It probably doesn't help that there are 3 out and out Centers in the top 4 in Oklahoma. At least two of them have expiring contracts.


Nobbers - San Antonio Spurs (34-48)
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As old man hobbers is entering the twilight of his career, his son Nobbers (it's going to bother me to no end that he's got a capital first letter unlike his father) has stepped into the NBA with a bang, immediately improving on his pre-draft abilities. I'd be surprised if it's enough for the Spurs to make the playoffs, but it's impossible to predict how the team is going to look next year with all those expiring contracts.


Dr. Dwayne - New Orleans Pelicans (32-50)
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Dr. Dwayne saw further decline since last season, like many of our other geriatric-y players. He's 36 now, and not much of a jumper, nor a runner. He's still a great shooter, though, and - as long as he doesn't have to jump for it - perfectly capable of catching a rebound. Quite impressive, really. So in that sense it's more worrying that this 36-year old is still the 2nd most important player on his team. The newly named Pelicans aren't making the playoffs. That's a nimic guarantee.


P-Nut & Salt Bailly - Sacramento Kings (36-46)
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If I see any more red I might have to alter the colour balance on my monitor. Salt Bailly has been an extremely solid player for a long, long time. And while he's taken a rather big step backwards, particularly in his athletic abilities, he's still more than good enough to form part of a good team. Unfortunately he's in Sacramento instead. Here too it's worrying that a 36-year old is the 2nd best player on the team. The best player is P-Nut, who isn't quite as old. 29 means it's probably more down than up for him from here on, but we'll see.


Solius & sontodevil - Memphis Grizzlies (42-40, Conference Finals)
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Solius is another one who started feeling the creaking in his bones this summer. In his case, though, it mostly impacted his speed and jumping abilities, leaving him elite in all the technical skills. He's still one of the best players in the league. And now he's been joined by the #1 pick the past draft, sontodevil, altodevil's own boy! He seems to have modelled his game on his father's, up to and including refusing to shoot the ball even under threat of imprisonment. Though clearly he's seen his old man fumble one too many pass, and the trauma has led him to sacrificing a little bit of physicality for the sake of actually being able to complete a pass.
 
Surely a cafite will end up on the Spurs with me with all that salary wiggle room
 
A „Caf-West vs Caf-East“ (or better handcrafted and balanced) event would be nice - assume sth spectacularly outta bounce like that isn‘t (easily) manufactured, nimic?
 
weetee said:
A „Caf-West vs Caf-East“ (or better handcrafted and balanced) event would be nice - assume sth spectacularly outta bounce like that isn‘t (easily) manufactured, nimic?
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I can pick the All Star Teams if I want. Or the playoff teams. Or edit the conferences. I could clone the league too, so we could run one-off events like that, but I'd have to figure out what that would look like.
 
nimic said:
I can pick the All Star Teams if I want. Or the playoff teams. Or edit the conferences. I could clone the league too, so we could run one-off events like that, but I'd have to figure out what that would look like.
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Clone the league and edit the all-star event (dunks, 3p and the match) sounds perfect :lol:

But since it‘d be a one-off event I think it it‘d be more interesting when everybody‘s rejuvenated.
 
13/14 25-Game Update
13/14 25-Game Update

(@BenitoSTARR @Dan @Dr. Dwayne @P-Nut @Salt Bailly @Samid @Skizzo @Solius @Stobzilla @The Cat @V.O. @altodevil @hobbers @oneniltothearsenal @reelworld @sebsheep @weetee)

I'm going to just start tagging everyone in these updates, let me know if it's too much for you.

@Dan you still haven't found a team, and you're probably not going to get any better at 36. If you want to I could retire you mid-season and you could jump in with a new 17-year old immediately. Or if you prefer to be in the draft, you could create your guy and you'll pop up next season.

Trades

Dr. Dwayne (Pelicans > Cavaliers) - lucky! Didn't have to stay on the worst team in the league for long.
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Nobbers (Spurs) - definitely seems like the Spurs won this trade.
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reelworld II (Bucks), Nobbers (Spurs)
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reelworld II (Bucks) - Bucks going big here! That's three decent players and two first round picks for John Wall. He better be worth it.
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Salt Bailly & P-Nut (Kings) - seems fair?
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Solius & sontodevil (Grizzlies), Samid (Bobcats) - huge trade by Charlotte. Memphis seem to be planning ahead, but it does make it less likely they will win immediately.
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weetee (Hawks)
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Conference Standings

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Oof! Only altodevil is currently in a playoff spot out of all our West Cafites. I thought Nobbers with the Spurs and Solius & sontodevil would definitely make the playoffs this season, but of course they're only one win behind in any case. The Cub has a chance, and I guess technically so do Salt Bailly & P-Nut - though I doubt it.

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The East is quite the reverse of the West. I think last season looked like this too, and then a few of you had bad second halves of the season and missed out on the playoffs after all. hobbers & Skizzo are dominating the league even more than last season, despite the supposed decline. BenitoSTARR & Stobzilla II are doing very well again, as is V.O. with the Nets. The Bobcats doing as well as they are must be quite a pleasant surprise for Samid, and the same for SebJr and Miami (though he may have suspected it from the season preview). Those two are equal with Dr. Dwayne's new Cavaliers, and only one ahead of Two Nil and the Raptors. Even reelworld II and weetee aren't out of reach.
 
Will hobo eventually make it this year? Or feck it up as usual? Stay tuned!
 
hobbers losing from here would be the funniest part of this experiment
 
25-0. Is that the best we've seen at this stage?
 
@nimic it looks like missing the draft and that first year boost might have slowed my development
 
@nimic for how many franchises did I play? Thought it were only three? My profile pic shows like six.
 
weetee said:
@nimic for how many franchises did I play? Thought it were only three? My profile pic shows like six.
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(every year is one season)

99-04 Seattle
05-06 Indiana
07-07 Cleveland
07-14 Atlanta

Cleveland signed you, then they traded you to Atlanta a third way through the season. You also have two different Seattle jerseys and two different Atlanta jerseys. I guess their design changed or something.
 
13/14 All-Star Update Part 1
13/14 All Star Update Part 1

(@BenitoSTARR @Dan @Dr. Dwayne @P-Nut @Salt Bailly @Samid @Skizzo @Solius @Stobzilla @The Cat @V.O. @altodevil @hobbers @oneniltothearsenal @reelworld @sebsheep @weetee)

Trades

Dan is still without a team.

Salt Bailly (Kings > Pistons), P-Nut (Kings) - yet another duo has been broken up by the cruel fates of saving salary money. The Kings are definitely looking to the future, and 36-year old Salt Bailly does not feature in it.
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weetee (Hawks > Timberwolves) - weetee has to buy a coat
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SebJr (Heat) - That's a lot of assets for Brandon Jennings, but it sure seems like the Heat are going to try to be good. But then they get two picks in another trade, so... I don't know.
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BenitoSTARR & Stobzilla II (Knicks), Dr. Dwayne (Cavaliers) - you tell me
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Samid (Bobcats) - The Bobcats must have not liked how well they were doing.
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For the benefit of weetee and Salt Bailly, here are their new teams:

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Conference Standings (and record since last update)

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altodevil and the Lakers are doing their thing, but other than that it's a struggle for playoff spots in the West. At this rate rookie Nobbers is going to overtake veteran weetee. Also at this rate Solius & sontodevil aren't going to be the force I thought they would be. Not yet, anyway. P-Nut and The Cub are nowhere to be seen. They're actually doing really well personally, but their teams are... shit.

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We've still got a plethora of Cafites in playoff spots in the East, but Two Nil and V.O. have to turn things around if they want to avoid being overtaken on the final lap. reelworld II seems far down, but his Bucks are actually only two wins down from the Raptors, so he's not out either. Salt Bailly is, however, completely out. He's just enjoying his twilight years, sitting on his porch in sunny Detroit.

On the other side, hobbers & Skizzo are still dominating, it's just that 25-8 somehow looks bad when you started 25-0. But there's no chance of anyone catching up, despite all of BenitoSTARR & Stobzilla's Knicks, Dr. Dwayne's Cavaliers, SebJr's Miami and Samid's Bobcats all having winning records.

All Star Weekend

Slam Dunk Contest

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I said he was doing alright, and The Cub went and proved me right by winning the slam dunk contest! Take that, Kevin Durant.

Here's the winning dunk (and also the only successful dunk in the final round)

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13/14 All Star Update Part 2
13/14 All Star Update Part 2

3 Point Contest

Contestants - "only" four Cafites this time, probably because Solius is out injured. But we've got 5x winner BenitoSTARR, reigning contest champion reelworld II, as well as two players who have been very close but never managed to win: P-Nut and Samid.

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1st Round - 4 advance

Kirk Hinrich: 21
Klay Thompson: 26
Kevin Durant: 20
Sasha Vujacic: 22

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Samid is already through with that.

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Ooh, uncharacteristically bad shooting by BenitoSTARR. It would take a miracle to keep him in it.
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P-Nut is through, and he also eliminates BenitoSTARR.
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reelworld II will have to shoot a tiebreak round.
Sasha Vujacic: 22

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One more tiebreak.
Sasha Vujacic: 20
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Not great shooting by reelworld II, but he is through to the 2nd Round, where he will join Samid, Klay Thompson and P-Nut.


2nd Round - 2 advance
Klay Thompson: 27

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We're going to have a new 3 Point Contest Champion: P-Nut and Samid will battle it out in one final round.




Final Round

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Okay, one more final round then. But I swear to god, that's the limit of my tolerance.

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I just checked with Michael Owen and he's told me 24 is more than 23, so we won't have to have another tiebreak!

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Congratulations to P-Nut, he's finally won it!

All Star Game

Teams

Solius barely misses out with an injury, but the West still has a strong Cafite contingent. The East still has the two best players (Durant and hobbers), but the West definitely seems to have more young stars (reelworld II notwithstanding)

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Game

The West strikes back, after 4 straight East wins (and 7 in 8).

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nimic said:
This thread gains lots of views during the night. It must be the Americans (or those viewbots I bought).
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Pretty funny how this thread is 3x more popular than the actual NBA on the caf.

I think it's getting to be time for my dude to die on the way back to his home planet... For a replacement, can we have versatile positions like a lot of the real players have (GF, F, G etc) or do we need to stick to one of the 5 specific positions?
 
V.O. said:
Pretty funny how this thread is 3x more popular than the actual NBA on the caf.

I think it's getting to be time for my dude to die on the way back to his home planet... For a replacement, can we have versatile positions like a lot of the real players have (GF, F, G etc) or do we need to stick to one of the 5 specific positions?
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You can pick a versatile position, or even auto if you want.
 
Playing with my son, brings a tear to your eye get fecked pedos
 
nimic said:
This thread gains lots of views during the night. It must be the Americans (or those viewbots I bought).
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Yep, South Americans love viewing news about weetee - 2x champ from Brazil they’ve never heard of.

@nimic as retirement nears, how many times did I make the play-offs? Around 50%? Decent career after all, always starting 5 too. All-Stars once would have been nice to have though.
 
weetee said:
Yep, South Americans love viewing news about weetee - 2x champ from Brazil they’ve never heard of.

@nimic as retirement nears, how many times did I make the play-offs? Around 50%? Decent career after all, always starting 5 too. All-Stars once would have been nice to have though.
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8 out of 15 so far, this is your 16th season. I'm actually surprised you didn't make All Star at least once yet. Though somehow your PER is increasing the last few years. With Minnesota so far you've got the highest PER of your career.
 
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