Player Ratings 2023/2024

RedDevilCanuck

Quite dreamy - blue eyes, blond hair, tanned skin
Joined
Feb 22, 2007
Messages
8,586
Location
The GTA
Goalkeepers
Altay Bayindir N/A
Tom Heaton N/A
Andre Onana 5

Defenders
Diogo Dalot 8
Jonny Evans* 7
Victor Lindelof 4
Harry Maguire* 7
Tyrell Malacia N/A
Lisandro Martinez N/A
Sergio Reguilon 6
Luke Shaw* 5
Raphael Varane 7
Aaron Wan-Bissaka* 5
Kambwala 5

Midfielders
Sofyan Amrabat 6
Casemiro 4
Christian Eriksen 4
Bruno Fernandes 6
Scott McTominay* 5
Mason Mount* N/A
Facundo Pellistri N/A
Donny van de Beek N/A
Mainoo 8

Forwards
Antony 3
Anthony Martial 4
Marcus Rashford* 4
Jadon Sancho* N/A
Hojland 6
Amad 6
Garnacho 7
Forson N/A

*Denotes player fulfils the Premier League’s homegrown criteria.
 
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RedDevilCanuck said:
Goalkeepers
Altay Bayindir N/A
Tom Heaton N/A
Andre Onana 5

Defenders
Diogo Dalot 8
Jonny Evans* 7
Victor Lindelof 4
Harry Maguire* 7
Tyrell Malacia N/A
Lisandro Martinez N/A
Sergio Reguilon 6
Luke Shaw* 5
Raphael Varane 7
Aaron Wan-Bissaka* 5
Kambwala 5

Midfielders
Sofyan Amrabat 6
Casemiro 4
Christian Eriksen 4
Bruno Fernandes 6
Scott McTominay* 5
Mason Mount* N/A
Facundo Pellistri N/A
Donny van de Beek N/A
Mainoo 8

Forwards
Antony 3
Anthony Martial 4
Marcus Rashford* 4
Jadon Sancho* N/A
Hojland 6
Amad 6
Garnacho 7
Forson N/A

*Denotes player fulfils the Premier League’s homegrown criteria.
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Sofyan Amrabat wasn't close to a 6 dude. The rest is fine though.
 
So Shaw gets a rating with 15 appearances, but Martinez doesn't with 14? :confused:
 
If we do league only

8: Mainoo
7: Dalot, Garnacho, Bruno
6: Onana, Maguire, Evans, Højlund, Varane, McTominay

The rest is 4, 5 or played too little to be graded
 
I'm only rating those with a 6.5 or higher. I also skipped those who have been injured for more than 20 games:

7.5 - Bruno
7.0 - Dalot
6.5 - Garnacho
6.5 - Mainoo

Score explanations:

10 = legendary
9 = great (PL POTY quality)
8 = core United player quality
7 = good enough to start
6 = absolute bare minimum (useful, but not good enough to start)
5 = not even good enough for a relegated team
4 or lower = how on earth did you even get a spot in the squad?
 
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Scandi Red said:
I'm only rating those with a 6 or higher. I also skipped those who have been injured for more than 20 games:

7.5 - Bruno
7.0 - Dalot
6.5 - Garnacho
6.5 - Mainoo

Score Explanations:

6 = absolute bare minimum (not good enough to start)
7 = good enough to start
8 = core player quality
9 = great (PL POTY quality)
10 = legendary
Click to expand...

You wouldn't give Maguire or Evans even a 6? Or Hojlund? Seems harsh
 
Altay Bayindir - Worst GK in the World
Tom Heaton - Best GK in the World
Andre Onana - Sometimes the best, sometimes the worst GK in the world - 5

Defenders
Diogo Dalot - Imagine if he wasn't thick - 8
Jonny Evans - Hero - 7.5
Victor Lindelof - Softer and crapper then even I was anticipating - 3.5
Harry Maguire - Not softer and not crapper then even I was anticipating - 6.5
Tyrell Malacia - Pregnant - 0
Lisandro Martinez - Great for the 5 minutes he played - 6
Sergio Reguilon - Was showing to be a hard-working, fine left-back, so we dropped him and played a right-back at left-back, 5
Luke Shaw - Dead - 4
Raphael Varane - Best individual performance of the season vs. Liverpool playing at Anfield - 7
Aaron Wan-Bissaka - Proper shit, until the final - 3
Kambwala - Fine - 5

Midfielders
Sofyan Amrabat - Nowhere near as bad as lots said, never got a proper chance in midfield, great cup final - 4.5
Casemiro - Sad face - 3
Christian Eriksen - Old face - 4
Bruno Fernandes - Would be a 7.5, but he disgracefully missed a game through injury, so 1.
Scott McTominay - Scored goals, was rubbish, scored goals, was rubbish - 5
Mason Mount - The greatest and most logical singing in football history - 3
Facundo Pellistri - Ran around - 4
Donny van de Beek - Who?
Mainoo - Lisan Al Gahib - 7.5

Forwards
Antony - Over Celebrated vs. Notts County, shittest footballer on the planet - 2.5
Anthony Martial - Dead 2.0 - 3
Marcus Rashford - On very rare occassions he reminded you he isn't shit, which made it all the more annoying that he's been mostly shit all season - 3.5
Jadon Sancho - Wanker - 1
Hojland - Threatened to be crap, then threatened to be great, then threatened to be crap, now looks to be good? - 6
Amad - Scored a great goal, saved the managers job, got dropped because of it - 5
Garnacho - Shit hair - 7.5
 
Annihilate Now! said:
Altay Bayindir - Worst GK in the World
Tom Heaton - Best GK in the World
Andre Onana - Sometimes the best, sometimes the worst GK in the world - 5

Defenders
Diogo Dalot - Imagine if he wasn't thick - 8
Jonny Evans - Hero - 7.5
Victor Lindelof - Softer and crapper then even I was anticipating - 3.5
Harry Maguire - Not softer and not crapper then even I was anticipating - 6.5
Tyrell Malacia - Pregnant - 0
Lisandro Martinez - Great for the 5 minutes he played - 6
Sergio Reguilon - Was showing to be a hard-working, fine left-back, so we dropped him and played a right-back at left-back, 5
Luke Shaw - Dead - 4
Raphael Varane - Best individual performance of the season vs. Liverpool playing at Anfield - 7
Aaron Wan-Bissaka - Proper shit, until the final - 3
Kambwala - Fine - 5

Midfielders
Sofyan Amrabat - Nowhere near as bad as lots said, never got a proper chance in midfield, great cup final - 4.5
Casemiro - Sad face - 3
Christian Eriksen - Old face - 4
Bruno Fernandes - Would be a 7.5, but he disgracefully missed a game through injury, so 1.
Scott McTominay - Scored goals, was rubbish, scored goals, was rubbish - 5
Mason Mount - The greatest and most logical singing in football history - 3
Facundo Pellistri - Ran around - 4
Donny van de Beek - Who?
Mainoo - Lisan Al Gahib - 7.5

Forwards
Antony - Over Celebrated vs. Notts County, shittest footballer on the planet - 2.5
Anthony Martial - Dead 2.0 - 3
Marcus Rashford - On very rare occassions he reminded you he isn't shit, which made it all the more annoying that he's been mostly shit all season - 3.5
Jadon Sancho - Wanker - 1
Hojland - Threatened to be crap, then threatened to be great, then threatened to be crap, now looks to be good? - 6
Amad - Scored a great goal, saved the managers job, got dropped because of it - 5
Garnacho - Shit hair - 7.5
Click to expand...

Every word.
 
4 for Rashford is very generous considering the difference between last season and this. He wasn’t even half as good this season.
 
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