Ode to a Muppet Weekend

Mr Pigeon

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Like JFK, and Valyria Doom,
Or Neil Armstrong stood proud on the moon,
Like '99 or the first time you got spunky,
Where we you on Muppet Sunday?
Imagine it; a muppets dream,
A Lego designed football team,
As Woody added blocks on blocks,
And we all screamed out "Please don't stop!"

It started off with spying flights,
"He's landed folks! We've got our guy!"
A quiff of hair and sockless shoes,
We all agreed this was great news.
But this was just a mere foreplay,
We lay in bed, wank sock thrown away,
We tugged it slow till it was sore,
But Woody knew we wanted more.

"What next?" He said with affection.
"Oh, nothing. Just a German legend!"
We gripped on tight, we rubbed with glee,
We tugged until we couldn't see.
And as our wrinkly balls were spent,
Our peckers went in slow descent,
But as the moon danced in the sky,
We found out Frenchy snuck through in disguise.

So "grab it once more", we all said.
As sparks floated through our heads,
"This is too much work, I can't keep going"
We passed out from too many explosions.
So now we must end our Muppet Weekend,
With Bastian, Morgan and Darmian,
Our legs are weak, our giblets raw,
Something something Cina's maw.
 
Last edited:
Mr Pigeon said:
Like JFK, and Valyria Doom,
Or Neil Armstrong stood proud on the moon,
Like '99 or the first time you got spunky,
Where we you on Muppet Sunday?
Imagine it; a muppets dream,
A Lego designed football team,
As Woody added blocks on blocks,
And we all screamed out "Please don't stop!"

It started off with spying flights,
"He's landed folks! We've got our guy!"
A quiff of hair and sockless shoes,
We all agreed this was great news.
But this was just a mere foreplay,
We lay in bed, wank sock thrown away,
We tugged it slow till it was sore,
But Woody knew we wanted more.

"What next?" He said with affection.
"Oh, nothing. Just a German legend!"
We gripped on tight, we rubbed with glee,
We tugged until we couldn't see.
And as our wrinkly balls were spent,
Our adrenaline went into slow descent,
But as the moon danced in the sky,
We found out Frenchy snuck through in disguise.

So "grab it once more", we all said.
As sparks floated through our heads,
"This is too much work, I can't keep going"
We passed out from too many explosions.
So now we must end our Muppet Weekend,
With Bastian, Morgan and Darmian,
Our legs are weak, our giblets raw,
Something something Cina's maw.
Click to expand...

Ridiculous, and sublime.
 
You forgot to log out of the caf and log into your johhnowhite account.
 
I'd like to splash all over them too.

GettyImages-98924822.jpg
 
The Pij is awesome.
 
Hush, little Muppet, don't feel shy.
Woody's gonna buy you Memphis Depay

And if that Dutch forward won't fly
Woody's gonna buy you an Italian guy

And if that Darmian is not enough,
Woody's gonna buy you a German tough

And if that Pig Farmer gets broke,
Woody's gonna buy you a Southampton bloke

And if that Frenchman can't hit a pass,
Woody's gonna buy you Ramos & Navas

And if those two can't stop goals
Woody's gonna buy you a Belgian Andy Cole

And if that striker can't be a 9 or 10
Woody's gonna buy Ronaldo again

And if they all fall down,
You'll still have the fullest stadium in town.
 
... and the best part is that you know there's still one or two more arrows left in the quill
 
Pigeon. Good one, mate.

"And as our wrinkly balls were spent,
Our peckers went in slow descent,
But as the moon danced in the sky,
We found out Frenchy snuck through in disguise." :lol::lol::lol:

More of these, and you will be a legend.
 
Mr Pigeon said:
Like JFK, and Valyria Doom,
Or Neil Armstrong stood proud on the moon,
Like '99 or the first time you got spunky,
Where we you on Muppet Sunday?
Imagine it; a muppets dream,
A Lego designed football team,
As Woody added blocks on blocks,
And we all screamed out "Please don't stop!"

It started off with spying flights,
"He's landed folks! We've got our guy!"
A quiff of hair and sockless shoes,
We all agreed this was great news.
But this was just a mere foreplay,
We lay in bed, wank sock thrown away,
We tugged it slow till it was sore,
But Woody knew we wanted more.

"What next?" He said with affection.
"Oh, nothing. Just a German legend!"
We gripped on tight, we rubbed with glee,
We tugged until we couldn't see.
And as our wrinkly balls were spent,
Our peckers went in slow descent,
But as the moon danced in the sky,
We found out Frenchy snuck through in disguise.

So "grab it once more", we all said.
As sparks floated through our heads,
"This is too much work, I can't keep going"
We passed out from too many explosions.
So now we must end our Muppet Weekend,
With Bastian, Morgan and Darmian,
Our legs are weak, our giblets raw,
Something something Cina's maw.
Click to expand...
Super! :lol:

shabadu84 said:
Hush, little Muppet, don't feel shy.
Woody's gonna buy you Memphis Depay

And if that Dutch forward won't fly
Woody's gonna buy you an Italian guy

And if that Darmian is not enough,
Woody's gonna buy you a German tough

And if that Pig Farmer gets broke,
Woody's gonna buy you a Southampton bloke

And if that Frenchman can't hit a pass,
Woody's gonna buy you Ramos & Navas

And if those two can't stop goals
Woody's gonna buy you a Belgian Andy Cole

And if that striker can't be a 9 or 10
Woody's gonna buy Ronaldo again

And if they all fall down,
You'll still have the fullest stadium in town.
Click to expand...
Brilliant stuff. :lol:
 
Very good.

For those saying it's RAWKish - I always thought the masturbating transfer muppet was just a RedCafe thing. Could be wrong I guess.
 
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