Film My Latest Short film (Don't Move)

Dirty Schwein

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Hey guys, this is my latest short film, Don't Move. Made on a low budget (whilst I was moving house :lol: ) but it has massively punched above its weight being played in many festivals worldwide, claiming a few awards and also getting a BIFA accreditation, where it was the opener to the upcoming horror film 'The Moor'.

As usual, many problems in the making of this film (including one of the actors turning up 3 hours late :lol: but we persevered and got it all done.

Please give it a like or drop a comment if you enjoy it/have anything to say. As always, happy to listen to criticism.
 
Decent mate.

Good little reveal but could see it and the jumpscare coming a mile off but I guess that's to be expected. I thought her just placing the inhaler down to get the mummy's attention wasn't very dramatic. Maybe she could've literally started waving her arms around and leading it away?

I don't watch much horror but I tend to prefer it when the characters are clever and do smart things but are still in a lot of danger despite that, because it makes the threat feel so real. Even though a character is making all the choices the viewer would they're still likely to die.
 
I haven’t watched it but I agree with all of Solius’ harsh criticisms and none of his praise.
 
Solius said:
Decent mate.

Good little reveal but could see it and the jumpscare coming a mile off but I guess that's to be expected. I thought her just placing the inhaler down to get the mummy's attention wasn't very dramatic. Maybe she could've literally started waving her arms around and leading it away?

I don't watch much horror but I tend to prefer it when the characters are clever and do smart things but are still in a lot of danger despite that, because it makes the threat feel so real. Even though a character is making all the choices the viewer would they're still likely to die.
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Thanks mate. The jump scare was not meant to turn out that way but major feck ups on the set led to it :lol: Agree with the rest, the waving of the inhaler is something I regretted ever since post production!
 
Dirty Schwein said:
Thanks mate. The jump scare was not meant to turn out that way but major feck ups on the set led to it :lol: Agree with the rest, the waving of the inhaler is something I regretted ever since post production!
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What sort of feck ups?

I would also say the door they 'closed' look like it did not even latch properly but I'm guessing that's just likely because this is a very small budget amateur thing in one of the actor's actual houses. I liked the creature standing on the street initially and thought more tension could be made of it trying to get in (as it was just suddenly not only in their exact house on the street but coming into the room - no front door issues?), but again that probably doesn't lend itself to the short-form style. And I guess it suddenly coming in is the point because she has to freeze in place.
 
Solius said:
What sort of feck ups?

I would also say the door they 'closed' look like it did not even latch properly but I'm guessing that's just likely because this is a very small budget amateur thing in one of the actor's actual houses. I liked the creature standing on the street initially and thought more tension could be made of it trying to get in (as it was just suddenly not only in their exact house on the street but coming into the room - no front door issues?), but again that probably doesn't lend itself to the short-form style. And I guess it suddenly coming in is the point because she has to freeze in place.
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Yes about the bold.

What I mean about feck ups are with regards to the time (we started 3 hours late on a 9 hour shoot so had to combine a lot of shots) and also the space was far more limited than we though (we weren't able to check it out before filming apart from a few pictures).

The lessons learned here applied to our latest one that I am editing right now and it's made a huge difference, will post that when its done :)

Moby said:
Tell us how you really feel @Solius :lol:
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Nah, it's good! I'm not precious about stuff I make and know I'm learning so any feedback is currency.
 
Dirty Schwein said:
Yes about the bold.

What I mean about feck ups are with regards to the time (we started 3 hours late on a 9 hour shoot so had to combine a lot of shots)
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Matthew Nicholas needs to work on his time-keeping.
 
Thankfully @Solius never enters the original songwriters thread.

Although I do wish somebody did (I should contribute more myself)!
 
Feel like i need a back story now, proper intriguing as to the situation and they got there.

Liked that one a lot, well done mate.
 
That was cool, enjoyed it.

I had an idea, what if you made it so instead of the jump scare the kid starts having an asthma attack and almost dies causing the woman to reluctantly move and get murdered by the zombie

Kid wakes up later on and the fake mum is giving him an inhaler
 
Good work :cool:

I couldn’t help but notice the door not shutting properly at the beginning. Sorry :lol:

I very rarely watch horror films but my preferred ending would’ve been the kid walking out of the flat with fake Mum, and being none the wiser, then the camera slowly panning back to show dead Mum’s body hidden under the bed.

The background music/score, whatever the technical term is, worked well with building up the tension.
 
Champ said:
Feel like i need a back story now, proper intriguing as to the situation and they got there.

Liked that one a lot, well done mate.
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Yeah that was the intention. We didn't have the money to make it post apocalyptic so thought let's do a small container story in a larger world.
SuperiorXI said:
That was cool, enjoyed it.

I had an idea, what if you made it so instead of the jump scare the kid starts having an asthma attack and almost dies causing the woman to reluctantly move and get murdered by the zombie

Kid wakes up later on and the fake mum is giving him an inhaler
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I wish I thought of this :lol:
 
Cole9 said:
Good work :cool:

I couldn’t help but notice the door not shutting properly at the beginning. Sorry :lol:

I very rarely watch horror films but my preferred ending would’ve been the kid walking out of the flat with fake Mum, and being none the wiser, then the camera slowly panning back to show dead Mum’s body hidden under the bed.

The background music/score, whatever the technical term is, worked well with building up the tension.
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This was one of the ideas we thought about but decided against it in the end. But I do like this idea.
 
Dirty Schwein said:
Yeah that was the intention. We didn't have the money to make it post apocalyptic so thought let's do a small container story in a larger world.

I wish I thought of this :lol:
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Market research your next one with us. We'll have some cracking ideas.
 
Also what's the mummy's intentions? Tries to kill the boy until the mum moves, then kills the mum and 'becomes' her and now wants to take the kid somewhere?
 
I liked it, well done.

But how did the mummy turn into the mother? Or is that a bit of a play on mummy/mother? And why - what's the plan for the mummy now?
 
Schmiznurf said:
You work in film and haven't tried to cast me, thought we were friends.
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It's because we are friends that I don't cast you.
Solius said:
Also what's the mummy's intentions? Tries to kill the boy until the mum moves, then kills the mum and 'becomes' her and now wants to take the kid somewhere?
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BD said:
I liked it, well done.

But how did the mummy turn into the mother? Or is that a bit of a play on mummy/mother? And why - what's the plan for the mummy now?
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Left it open but would assume the creatures harvest kids. It can become an adult but they want children.
 
Dr. Dwayne said:
Technically good but a bit short to really develop itself story wise.
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Yeah these are usually proof of concepts and hence very short. Think of it like an EP to an LP.

I have one more short in the works but doing a feature starting next year.
 
Dirty Schwein said:
Yeah these are usually proof of concepts and hence very short. Think of it like an EP to an LP.

I have one more short in the works but doing a feature starting next year.
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I'm thinking a little more dialogue after the kid asks about the food run would have been useful to set things up before the alarm starts.
 
Cole9 said:
Con Air 2?
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Now that's a sequel worth making!

Cameron Poe went to jail again some 10 years after for accidentally killing a guy in a bar who molested his underaged daughter....and bang, he's being transported again by a fecking airplane!

They made top gun 2, they can make con air 2 as well.
 
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