Mental issues related to football and life in general. Today's topic: “How to control our human ego? And how to not get carried away by our success?"

LuckyScout78

Full Member
Joined
Sep 14, 2018
Messages
1,065
I am going to a create a thread about mental issues and topics related to football and life in general.

I got this idea. When 2 years back in time. When Ten Hag first took over and I read that Garnacho had some attitude’s problem in preseason. Reason why Garnacho didn’t got picked or the match day squad for some pre season matches.

And now, 2 years I starting to write first post about some topics relate to our minds/mental and ours human ego. And how to not get carry away by ours success we achieved in ours life. Special for young players like Garnacho and Kobbie Mainoo. Two young players that achieved success really early in theirs football career.

In other words. How to handle success? So we still keep our feet on the ground. How to stay grounded? And it relate of course to ours human ego’s mind. How we can control and be aware of ours human ego’s mind.

That was short about how I got the idea from. Not only for football youngster. But life in general. Where and when we achieved success really early and do not know how to control ours human ego mind.



1. First topic and issue to solve is. How to control ours human ego?

First to solve it. We have to understand what human ego mind is. How it thoughts and how it behave/react.

A short definition of egoic mind from Google :

“ Egoic simply means “pertaining to ego” or “pertaining to I.” Egoic thoughts, motives, emotions, and behaviors are reactions in which I, me, and mine take center stage. An egoic reaction is one in which I am centrally involved. “



Like examples:

+ “I did it by myself “. “I have achieved everything by myself “

+ “This is MY style, don’t steal it”

+ Situation when ours human ego appear :

  • Fighting with your teammates about taking penalaties
  • Your teammate is in a better position to score than your position you are at. And you don’t pass and instead you try to score. Which you failure.


Our human ego mind :

  • It is all about I,I,I, I and ME, ME, ME, ME. Always want to most of the credit. Or take the center stage like describe above.
  • Ours human ego is leading by a narrow perspective. Opposite of a wider and total picture perspective.


Now I will explain how our human ego is related and leading by ours narrow perspective. Egoics synonyms with a narrow perspective.



From the most and extreme narrow perspective ---> to widest and total picture perspective.



Most narrow perspective:

+ I can do everything by myself to achieve everything I want.

Only I/Me = success

+ Me + One another person = success

+ Me + Mine teammates = success

+ Me + Mine teammates + mine coaches + The kit man + Clubs chef/food + Physio = success



Me + MT + Mine coaches + all peoples relate to the club + The owner + the sponsorships = success



Me + Mt + Mine coaches + all peoples relate to the club + The owners + the sponsorships + your football boots + The level of your opponents/how good they are/the level of the competition = success or not



Now the Sun, this Earth, big leaders and the Universe are claiming theirs credit too, to ours success.


Total and widest perspective. Opposite or our narrow human perspective and ego :

Me + Mt + Mine coaches + all peoples relate to the club + The owners + the sponsorships + your football boots + The level of your opponents/how good they are/the level of the + This earth/space + The Sun keeps this earth alive + Big leaders in this world = our success temporary.



So from the analysis above :

+ Our human ego is leading by our narrow perspective. Our human doesn’t see things in this life and Universe. With a widely and more correct perspective. Then ours behaviours will lead by this narrow perspective. Which we thought we have always been see things right.



+ The wider and total perspective is more = We than I & Me

We perspective = I need others factors/ingredients to success = everyone on this Universe, include the sun. Do play theirs part on my success. In every field and areas of life.



Example:

+ A football pitch and stadium is a space on this earth. And the earth need the sun to exist. Keep the earth warm and electricity to the stadium.

+ Big leaders. Not starting wars around your country. Our your country didn’t get involve in war. So the football didn’t stop by it. So theirs decision do play big part.

+ Millions of peoples are creating food we are eating to survive and play the game

+ Boots, Kits and etc.



So to solve and control our human ego mind is :

From a narrow perspective/ego/ I <---------------- change to ----------> We, bigger, wider and total perspective.

If we change ours perspective. On how we looks at things in life. Take refugee in the bigger picture perspective and stay in it. We can over time, can reduce or control ours human ego and mind.

BUT it needs time. Like everything in this world. Because we have since growing up as a babies. We have been learn by society and peoples around us. Cheering our human ego up. Time by time. Our human ego just growing bigger and bigger. Like a gas ballon. Always ready to explode, at anytime. So it has became a habit and how we behaviour. It come our personality and identity.



And of course we can change ours perspective and behaviours. Because ours narrow perspective are just result of many reasons and ingredients that lead to a narrow perspective.

It is a result of relations between many units and factors. Things in this Universe doesn’t exist by themselves = narrow perspective.

But again. It needs time to change the narrow perspective. And even when we see and knows things right and wider. But we human have habit to switch back to our narrow perspective. It can happen. In heat of fighting example. Our the demon in us/our ego mind talking in our mind to do ego things and decision.

So it just normal to fall back to narrow perspective. But when we have realize and accept that right perspective is more “WE” thand “I only “. When those ego narrow thought pop up. We just pull it to the wider perspective.

“Everything in this Universe is interdependence on each others and everything are result of interdependence “

Result of many units, ingredients, components and reasons that merge into a temporary result. Like success or anything physical material.



Again sum up. If we stay in this wider and right perspective. We can control ours human ego and how to keeps ours feet on the ground.

And of course we can handle the success we achieve in ours life too.

Contra if we are seeing and leading by ours narrow perspective and ours human ego mind. Then at some point we will meet the wall. Just to remind us. We can’t do and achieve everything alone. We need teammates, the level of ours opponents and a lot more factors.

So it was it has been a cliché why players, actors and peoples that are winning individual awards. Having speeches thanking a lot of peoples. Being thankful and appreciate others efforts are signs that you have seen things right.



But in the end. Not all peoples have a wider perspective and still have a really narrow perspective. Because of how ours society are created. So it is no need to look down and fight with them. Help them, not fighting. Like : “ Why are you so ego? “ “Why are you thinking of yourself all the time? “

And a lot of peoples are that. It is not easy to change peoples’s perspective.

But we can change ourselves first. From a narrow perspective to a wider and more correct perspective.

Even it is hard to conquer our own ego and winning over ourselves. But like above. Everything can change. Everything is not permanent. Like ours perspective and ego.

Right perspective is the key



And the main reason why our human can be so big and high that we lost ours feet on the ground.
 
Important subject and fair play for bringing it up although I'm not reading all that.
 
Not going to take the piss with this one but I'm glad you're discussing it. I'll try to read it if I get time.
 
Mines opinion is that yours thread title is a feckin' abomination.

(I'm sure the content is grand, but do something about the title - unless it's a piss take of some kind that I don't get, which is entirely possible.)
 
The first mistake you made was using Google to explain what the ego is.

I've done a lot of work on this, trust me bro, do a deep dive into Buddhism if you want to know what the ego is all about. If you read it off Google, all you are doing is reading a, mainly, left wing, liberal viewpoint of what the ego is. It will be flawed, because someone with an 'ego' would have written it, so it will instantly be wrong and biased.

The true definition of ego is explained fully by Buddhists. Only then will you get a true picture and understanding of it, from a non political or biased view.

I spent years studying it and reading about it, its very complex.

Hope this helps.
 
I like the bit where you said you were going to create this thread, I hope it goes well
 
All good points, but how do you actually put the solution into practice? Understanding it theoretically is the (comparatively) easy part of the problem.
 
Chelsea Dubbing said:
The first mistake you made was using Google to explain what the ego is.

I've done a lot of work on this, trust me bro, do a deep dive into Buddhism if you want to know what the ego is all about. If you read it off Google, all you are doing is reading a, mainly, left wing, liberal viewpoint of what the ego is. It will be flawed, because someone with an 'ego' would have written it, so it will instantly be wrong and biased.

The true definition of ego is explained fully by Buddhists. Only then will you get a true picture and understanding of it, from a non political or biased view.

I spent years studying it and reading about it, its very complex.

Hope this helps.
Click to expand...

TIL that the definition of “ego” can be right wing or left wing. Nobody mentioned that during my psychodynamic psychotherapy training.
 
Chelsea Dubbing said:
The first mistake you made was using Google to explain what the ego is.

I've done a lot of work on this, trust me bro, do a deep dive into Buddhism if you want to know what the ego is all about. If you read it off Google, all you are doing is reading a, mainly, left wing, liberal viewpoint of what the ego is. It will be flawed, because someone with an 'ego' would have written it, so it will instantly be wrong and biased.

The true definition of ego is explained fully by Buddhists. Only then will you get a true picture and understanding of it, from a non political or biased view.

I spent years studying it and reading about it, its very complex.

Hope this helps.
Click to expand...

how would you define the ego given you learnings on the subject?
 
Obviously nobody reading all that.

But, our medical department is shit, so 100% our mental health/psychology dept, if we have one, will also be shit.
 
I love the fact that lucky scout create threads and then neither replies to anyone nor participate in any conversation regarding the topic:lol:
 
I (chatGPT) took the time to summarise this to help out.

The post is a discussion about managing ego, particularly in the context of football, but also in life in general. The writer reflects on how young footballers, like Garnacho and Kobbie Mainoo, who achieve success early, must learn to stay grounded and control their ego.

The key idea is that human ego tends to focus on "I" and "me," leading people to believe they achieve success alone. The writer argues for a shift from this narrow, self-centered perspective to a broader view that recognizes the contribution of others—teammates, coaches, staff, and even external factors like the sun, earth, and societal leaders. This wider perspective promotes humility and gratitude.

Controlling ego, the writer suggests, is a gradual process that requires time and effort. Society often reinforces ego, making it harder to change, but understanding that success is a result of many interdependent factors helps keep people grounded. The post ends by emphasizing that individuals can change themselves and their perspectives, even if others are stuck in ego-driven mindsets.
 
Phil said:
I (chatGPT) took the time to summarise this to help out.

The post is a discussion about managing ego, particularly in the context of football, but also in life in general. The writer reflects on how young footballers, like Garnacho and Kobbie Mainoo, who achieve success early, must learn to stay grounded and control their ego.

The key idea is that human ego tends to focus on "I" and "me," leading people to believe they achieve success alone. The writer argues for a shift from this narrow, self-centered perspective to a broader view that recognizes the contribution of others—teammates, coaches, staff, and even external factors like the sun, earth, and societal leaders. This wider perspective promotes humility and gratitude.

Controlling ego, the writer suggests, is a gradual process that requires time and effort. Society often reinforces ego, making it harder to change, but understanding that success is a result of many interdependent factors helps keep people grounded. The post ends by emphasizing that individuals can change themselves and their perspectives, even if others are stuck in ego-driven mindsets.
Click to expand...
Still too long, ask chattything to shorten it and bring some sex in to draw attention.
 
Chelsea Dubbing said:
The first mistake you made was using Google to explain what the ego is.

I've done a lot of work on this, trust me bro, do a deep dive into Buddhism if you want to know what the ego is all about. If you read it off Google, all you are doing is reading a, mainly, left wing, liberal viewpoint of what the ego is. It will be flawed, because someone with an 'ego' would have written it, so it will instantly be wrong and biased.

The true definition of ego is explained fully by Buddhists. Only then will you get a true picture and understanding of it, from a non political or biased view.

I spent years studying it and reading about it, its very complex.

Hope this helps.
Click to expand...
That's exactly why I wouldn't.

And that's exactly where I stopped reading.
 
I think a big part of the problem is something I heard Rio referring to in an interview a few years back which is the lack of discipline amongst young players. Rio was saying that in his days as a youth team player, they'd be expected to clean the boots of the senior team. Rio said that this sort of thing is just unheard of now.

Rio was also saying that a lot of young players these days expect to be treated like superstars from the get go. They are so pampered as it is, and when they are given these huge contracts, it creates an environment for ego and an attitude of entitlement to spiral out of control.

The reason Fergie's United were so successful is because Fergie wasn't afraid to discipline players. He had that warm, fatherly side to him as well of course, but his refusal to let any player think they are bigger than the club kept the egos in check. Discipline teaches accountability, responsibility, and consequences for one's actions.

One of the best examples (in my opinion anyway) is Ronaldo. He was always a twat from the beginning, but Fergie's discipline alongside his fatherly influence kept his ego under control and kept him more responsible. As soon as he left us for Madrid, he lost that fatherly influence and his ego began to spiral out of control. Hence the reason for his stratospheric ego when he returned to us in 2021.

I honestly believe that although leaving for Madrid was amazing for his career, it didn't do his mental health any good as he lost that fatherly influence from Fergie that kept him grounded.

To sum it up - there is too much entitlement in footballers these days, and not enough discipline. Jose said it best - "Footballers these days are not men - they're brats".
 
I think it's important the keep the 'I' without having to be a dickhead. Without the 'I' you'll be left with players with no motivation to be successful. Stuffs like 'I want to be successful so <<insert personal dreams here>> therefore I'd push my team mates to do more' is not wrong as long as it lifts the overall standards of the team (like what Ronaldo used to do under SAF). But if it's about 'I want to look good for myself without any reason whatsoever' then that's when it becomes problematic.
 
Last edited:
Chelsea Dubbing said:
The first mistake you made was using Google to explain what the ego is.

I've done a lot of work on this, trust me bro, do a deep dive into Buddhism if you want to know what the ego is all about. If you read it off Google, all you are doing is reading a, mainly, left wing, liberal viewpoint of what the ego is. It will be flawed, because someone with an 'ego' would have written it, so it will instantly be wrong and biased.

The true definition of ego is explained fully by Buddhists. Only then will you get a true picture and understanding of it, from a non political or biased view.

I spent years studying it and reading about it, its very complex.

Hope this helps.
Click to expand...
Wow ... can't tell if this is satire :lol:

(Which would be brilliant, mind)
 
You must log in or register to reply here.