Originally posted by Rory Fitz:
<strong>Dr Richardson from the General Manchester Hospital has become worried recently about facilities in the hospital.
Here is what he has to say:
With the commencement of the Premiership we have become increasingly worried about the resources at our disposal. Diego Forlan is the main point of concern. It is thought that he might score his first goal for Manchester United and that would put great strain on our staff and resources. We simply could not cope with 68,000 fans unconcious. The problem could become an epidemic. With the exposure that the current media provide, the problem could spread nation-wide."
It is thought that a Forlan goal could affect the Merseyside, London and Midlands region. The NHS has now implemented the FORLAN MANOUVRE. This constitues :
"Putting the patient in the recovery position and saying any of the following:
- It was disallowed for off-side
- It didnt actually hit him, it was Solskajaers goal
- It was diallowed as he pushed the whole back four over to get the chance
It is expected to cost the NHS £10 to implement this new training programme as most people are aware of the treatment"
- Sorry lads, couldnt help it
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no need to be sorry, thats just not funny...