Crap remakes of classic films

032Devil

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Oct 26, 2004
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So, with some trepidation, I went to watch the remake of one of my favourite sci-fi films "The Day the Earth Stood Still" this afternoon (just before the match vs Spurs) and it left me reflecting what other things I could have spent my £7.85p on...

I mean, why the hell do they bother?

I could understand if they genuinely thought they had a better script way better than the original, but did they - hell no! They never do. That's just like too much hard work and after all, you can't improve on the original idea.

No, all they thought was lets think of a few good set pieces involving special effects made with CGI and we could mint a few hundred million more than the cost of making the film.

It's a meaningless, messageless waste of celluloid that just gives CGI a bad name.
 
Hollywood has run out of ideas!
They're remaking Robocop, Romancing the stone, They Live, Near Dark, A Nightmare on Elm street, Friday the 13th and several others.
It's all wrong!
 
Robocop, feck me Hollywood really are going back to the 80's.
 
Not sure about crap, but perhaps the most pointless, was Gus Van Sant's shot-for-shot remake of Psycho. In colour. Why?
 
King Kong.

70 years of technological advances and the monkey looks more lifeless than the original. And that was stop-motion photography with a model.
 
The King Kong remake was fantastic i thought. Bit on the long side, which was it's only downfall.
 
Woodzy said:
The King Kong remake was fantastic i thought. Bit on the long side, which was it's only downfall.
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I loved the original but thought the remake was brilliant as well. One of the better remakes IMHO.

The utterly ghastly ones that spring to mind besides the ones already mentioned are - Planet of the Apes and War of the Worlds.
 
I hated I Am Legend, not that good of a film on its own, but they missed the entire point of the original film and book...ie, why the feck its called I Am Legend

Replaced the ending with religious BS

Charlie and the Chocolate Factory - Wilder's version was funny and entertaining, Depp's was creepy
 
redspoony said:
They're remaking Escape From New York. Bad times.
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Wha??! :nervous:

Who the feck are they getting to play Snake? Matthew Mcconaughey? Or are they just going to throw a nice holywood cheque at Kurt Russell to come out of his retirement home and juice up with some roids a la Stallone and Schwarzenegger.
 
RedKaos said:
Wha??! :nervous:

Who the feck are they getting to play Snake? Matthew Mcconaughey? Or are they just going to throw a nice holywood cheque at Kurt Russell to come out of his retirement home and juice up with some roids a la Stallone and Schwarzenegger.
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I love Snake (not the sort of thing I usually say out loud)
Kurt has made some crap films, but his performances as Snake and Jack Burton are two of my favourites of the 80's
 
EZee said:
on a seperate point though... italian job... why why why remake that...
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Not technically a remake, more a homeage. They don't do the job in Italy for a start and they're watching Alfie (for some reason) and say "let's do it like the Italian Job". For me it was a shite film but wasn't a proper remake, thank god.
 
RedKaos said:
Wha??! :nervous:

Who the feck are they getting to play Snake? Matthew Mcconaughey? Or are they just going to throw a nice holywood cheque at Kurt Russell to come out of his retirement home and juice up with some roids a la Stallone and Schwarzenegger.
Click to expand...

Gerard Butler apparently.

Heathens. There's only one Snake Plissken.
 
I think the new batman films have been brilliant, a lot better than the previous ones.

Superman was shite.

The new hulk was good, but the first one was bollocks really..
 
"I mean, why the hell do they bother? "

Because people born after 1985 don't want to watch "classics" with acting we think is poor, effects we think are shit, and generally of crappy video/sound quality.

We don't want to see times without "computers" and "mobile phones" as we'd generally sit about screaming "why not just use a mobile?" or other shit.

It's just an obvious route for film makers to go, aimed at same audience from a different generation.

Actors seem better these days, the spin they put on remakes to make characters different (the new batmans are darker than the clowny feck about originals)
 
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